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Sex, Intimacy & Arthritis
Sex and the Married Gimp-A Woman's Point of View
Sex and the Married Gimp-A Woman's
Point of View
You are a pain killer. Upon achieving orgasm, the male and female brain releases endorphins, which are opiate-like chemicals that provide pain relief and cause the 'afterglow' of love-making.
Married arthritics worry about causing their spouse pain or discomfort during marital relations. But a married couple enjoys advantages in their relationship that ease the way around obstacles to a mutually satisfying love life. You married your partner to share the rest of your life with him or her, and that's the number one advantage.
Comfortable intimacy is a boon to great sex. Combine not being worried about your little pot belly or being seen in your bathrobe, with communication, shared schedules, and leisure time and you have all the ingredients needed for great loving.
Couples married for more than a few years have dealt with such things as menstrual cycles, occasional bouts of impotence, abstinence after the birth of children and other coping issues. Arthritis is just another one like those!
Talk with your mate. If you're too tired or too hurting, say so! Chances are you haven't wasted time or money on a fancy dinner and a movie; so waiting a night won't hurt. A special note to ladies, though...it is a very loving and kind thing to treat your hubby to your manual and oral skills if you're not up to the full intercourse desired. If it's the husband who is arthritic, it's a great idea to be open to alternatives to intercourse when he needs them.
Couples need pillows, pillows and some more pillows! Pillows under her hips may make the angle of stimulation greater, thereby achieving orgasm in less time with less strain. A pillow under each knee of his can help avoid the painful shocks that osteoarthritis of the knee can give. And lying your man on his back on pillows as the wife takes 'top' can save much back strain for him.
Shower chairs are a boon for arthritics. Having the husband seated first with the wife atop in the classical Tantric postions is easier on both mates. And perhaps arthritics were in mind when adjustable heights for the chairs were fashioned? Getting the chair to just the right height with one partner seated on the chair and the other in the tub facilitates wonderful oral explorations.
A partially inflated air mattress in the tub, combned with warm water, can be a relaxing and inviting love-making option. Bubbles are fun, too!
We respond sexually through our senses, and our main sex organ is our brain. Inventiveness and variety help keep the sexual relations interesting and attractive; and keep couples intimate and close.
The biologic drugs used for arthritis are very helpful. Scheduling is important. If you or your partner are due for an infusion shortly, the 'fade' of the drug may make sex uncomfortable or lead to soreness. Married couples can take time for cuddle nights or soft massage nights instead of more active choices for sexual relations at those times. Scheduled sex can avoid the complications of pain from trying to please your partner sexually at the wrong time for you. Clear and loving communicating is key.
I'm disabled from arthritis, but far from shy. If any reader has questions or suggestions for this lay-person (pun intended); please post a note to Rosie at
post147@strato.net I'll get right on it.
Thanks...and enjoy yourself and your life mate, too.
P.S. from Norm: I have arthritis as does Rosie. I wish for all the arthritics reading these articles a warm, loving, close and fun life of intimacy, such as she and I have come to know.
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