I don't even know where to begin. Many of you remember the U of M debacle....well, after that I saw my regular rheumy who was a bit unconvincing but I think she realized how upset I was and just told me to stay on the humira and pred, she did add a low dose of lycria to see if that would help.
I saw my regular internist yesterday, she is my primary care dr. I have been seeing her for about 7 years, well before I got sick. She has always listened and has always been one of my favorite doctors because of her compassion.
I know the U of M dr called her because he told me he did and wanted me to follow up with her, thus the appt yesterday. I had all my paper work in a binder folder, a list of current symptoms and medications and a list of questions. I even printed out some of the info Pip has provided on ap therapy and some other info regarding POTS syndrome and thyroid issues.
She wanted nothing to do with it. I handed her my 2 page list of symptoms and current medications and she didn't even read it. She than asked me what drugs I was on and I told her I just handed it to her and she said she wanted me to tell her, umm, I write it down because I forget things easily.
She wouldn't even read the other stuff I brought or look at my lab tests. She said ALL my problems are from long term pred use and that I am overweight and depressed. PERIOD.
I tried to explain that when I got sick, I weighted 136 pounds, she even has it in her file, didn't matter. Told her I have been sick for 3 years and only have been on pred and a low dose at that, for just over a year. Wouldn't listen. When I showed her my hands, she said thats not swelling, they are just fat, exact words. I asked her if they are just fat than why do they hurt so bad, because I am depressed. Told her I wasn't depressed until I got sick, wouldn't believe me.
When I asked her about my 99.9 temperature, she blew it off. When I asked why my blood pressure has been so high, it was 180/130 when she herself took it, because of the predisone. Pulse, 120, because I was upset. My cholsterol thats over 300, because I a fat. The unrelenting pain and fatigue, because I am depressed. Round and round for over an hour.
I left there feeling violated, let down and yes, more depressed than ever. My husband last night didn't understand why I was so upset and asked how many drs have to tell me that I am fat and depressed before I listen? Very helpful indeed.
So, all my pills went into a bag. I am only taking my bc pills, not because my husband is ever getting laid again but because I get migraines from the estrogen withdrawal. I took my pain pill and my provigil so I wouldn't fall asleep at work today since I have not slept. I did take my lexapro since my only problem is depression. I haven't eaten anything. I figure if I am anorexic and collapse of drug withdrawal, maybe someone will actually help me. I have not decided about the lycria yet, I am supposed to go from the 25 mg to the 50 in two days.
I KNOW this is a stupid thing to do but I see no other options right now. If one more person tells me I am just fat and depressed, I will be pushed over the edge. I am mid meltdown at the moment and just trying to get through my day at work.
I don't really expect many comments here as I know what I am doing is wrong but I just had to tell someone who might possibly see why I am so upset. I figure one of two things is going to happen,my body will shut down from the lack of drugs, including prednisone and than maybe someone will listen to me or I will get better because I am really just depressed and fat.
Here's my two cents - you may well be "fat and depressed" but someone needs to look beyond that and see that those are the result of whatever has been causing you the pain and other difficulties you've had. I'm so sorry this has happened!
I've seen the shows on "The Learning Channel" where someone has a mysterious disease and doctor after doctor tells them it's all in their head, or it's nothing... and well, you know, these doctors are not god. Oftentimes there is something that the doctors are simply missing. Keep searching till you get an answer.
You know what they call a someone who skated through med school with a "C" average?
DOCTOR.
Anyone can go to med school with enough time and money.
Hey - I know I'm new here - BUT - hang in there!!!!! I was told the same thing 30 years ago. I still don't test positive for anything! I too, Kept telling the drs ( yes, I made a round of them) it wasn't depression - I was depressed because I couldn't get up by myself or cook or anything!!! Remember depression does make you hurt - been there done that - stress also adds to it - also the extra weight makes everything worse - I too have been at the same place. Try reading carbohydrates addicts diet - you can get it from the library - it helped me alot - it really works!!! I'll try and watch for your name - I'll be your personal cheering squad!!!!
Michele,
I just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear how poorly and unprofessionally you were treated. I do not care if a person is 500 lbs there is a thing called tack. My heart goes out to you and I can relate I was about 150 until diagnosed and medicated???
I can do nothing more than offer support. Please take care of yourself and if you feel depressed you have reason to look at your life of late. STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I am so sorry that this U of M doc seems to have "infected" your PCP and you have now been through the ringer not once, but three times if we include your hubby, who is probably trying to just do the best he can with the info he has, not realizing how hurtful one little comment can be from the people we love.
It is so sad that in our culture you have to be in an emergency situation to get appropriate care. I understand why you are going off your meds, but this appointment just happened yesterday and I believe you need some time to think about this, and then if you want to go forward, taper, taper, taper. Especially the pred and the Lyrica. And please eat something. If for no other reason than to get through your day at work (I know what that's like). Eating nothing is worse for you than eating too much.
Please be careful and don't jeopardize your health more than these two doc's are already doing. And while I hate what your hubby said, maybe he needs some other information to balance out what he's hearing from these docs and some time to process it. Sadly, it's less scary to have a fat, depressed wife than one who has serious illnesses requiring serious medications. Unfortunately that means that he's not there for you right now in the way that you need him. But we're here for you.
Please take some time, think this through, and do what you need to do, but in as healthy a way as you can.
Edited to clarify that I believe depression is a serious illness that can require serious medications (didn't realize how that sounded until I re-read it), but perhaps it doesn't have the same kind of scary, long-term damage and consequences as RA and other diseases.
oh dear Michele, you are suffering. nothing hurts more than not being listened to even if the doc rejected your suggestions he/she could have comforted you and said 'this is what I'd like you to do to get to feeling better'. Please oh please remember this pain messes with your brain as well as your (our) bodies, so it is harder to think about what to do next. I hope you can make it through one day at a time and not over-react to one doctor. There are other physicians out there and I hope you can find one that understands how we all feel about 'taking these powerful drugs' , none of us want to take them and are anxious to 'get off of them' as quickly as possible. (I got into a mess last month when I cancelled my appointment for remicade, thinking I could make it for 6 weeks as I was feeling sooooo good, even wanted to reduce the mtx!! and prednisone. WRONG! I had a heck of a time 'getting in for the 4 week infusion' , but just kept bugging them! I got it and feel much better this week, now trying to get off the pred...again. It's always something new.
I know how you feel and I'm glad you wrote to the forum. You know we are always here. Lynda
Michelle, I am deeply troubled by your post. How dare a physician leave you with such despair. I am so sorry that this is the best diagnosis that they can come up with. I feel your frustration!!!! Please don't risk your health by cutting of your meds too quickly and as for your husband ... do you have a doghouse
Connie
Thank you everyone. Yes, I do agree that I am over weight, I am 5foot 8 inches and just under 200 pounds and that I am depressed but as someone mentioned above, it is because I hurt and can barely function.Michelle,
I too am deeply troubled by your treatment. I don’t blame you for being upset, and to be honest, I would probably be tempted to do what you are doing (put all my pills in a bag). However, please do not do yourself more harm because of the incompetence of those two doctors.
Like JasmineRain, I watch those mystery disease shows too. The one I watch is “Mystery Diagnosis.” Some of those people get the same treatment you just had and they visit many doctors before someone finally listens to them. You should do the same.
I don’t know how many doctors you have visited, but let me encourage you to visit another one. Don’t let the doctors you have already visited push you into that pit of despair they already think you are in. You know your own body better than they do!
Michelle, sorry to hear the incompetence with which you've been treated today and especially that the dr you felt you had a connection with has let you down. I dont know what I'd do if my doctor stopped believing me when I went in and said I'm ill.
Very gently, though can I ask (and answer PM if you'd like), are you 'heavy'? Despite your ills could loosing some weight help? I just ask because having been light and gone heavy and gone normal (ish) its amazing how much difference the loss of some wobbly stuff can help, especially the joints.
I agree with all the other girls and boys that you shouldnt just stop your meds in a oner, you could go into some awful shock and that wont help anything/anyone.
Cross on your behalf for an insensitive dr.
Yes and I am heavy at just under 200 pounds and 5'8. I do know that losing some weight will help. However, when all this started I was working out everyday, 6 miles on an elliptical trainer and doing light weight lifting and I was down to 126 pounds. After the first few iscarriages, I was up to right around 140 pounds and thats when things got really bad health wise. I do not discount the fact that I AM overweight and yes, would probably feel a little better if I lost some weight but I just can not believe that all my problems are weight related since i was not fat when all this started. I am not offened at all by your comments but I can't help but to think that there are a LOT of people out there much heavier than me that don't have the health issues that I do.
Everyone always assumes it is your weight and depression. I was told that a couple 5 or 6 times. ok I know I am overweight But I have been heavy all my life and wasnt depressed till I couldnt function at 100 % or even 50%. I too went through bouts of swollen hands (they would xray and find nothing and say "what do you want us to do??"I went to emergency room once because my legs had given out and I couldnt walk. Spent 8 hrs to leave with no help again them saying nothing was wrong. My first rhuematologist tested me and said arthritis and put me on plaquiunil and celebrex the celebrex was a joke it did no good ended up using naprosyn rh level was 93 then after 6 months I started flaring really bad and he changed nothing and would do nothing for the pain either would just sit and cry or in shower so no one would see me.Finially went to see a great pulminologist because was having problems upper respirtory and he was a godsend. He didnot see the the fat he saw a person who had feelings. His bedside manner was more then anyone could ask for. He ran tests no one had to see what was and was not healthy and could not really find much except my back and neck ((degenerative disk disease) Sent me to a rhumatologist he had heards of and I dont know if he is going to work out but will see as have only had 1 apt. but he never m3entioned my weight except to say I knew what I needed to do but till I can he would help.How do u exercise when IT HURTS JUST TO STAND FOR LONGER THWEN 3 MINUTES. and then when u clean house u r in bed for the next 24 hours
So micheleb I do know where you are coming from luckly my hubby doesnt believe its my weight He evn got us kicked out of a doctors office because the doctor was really rude to me and made me cry. lol your hubby probably just doesnt know what to do. give him time and knowledge. and keep trying to find a good doctor they are out there some doctors just feel threatened by someone who is so forward in their treatment its like stepping on their toes. You will succeed
also sorry at last test my rh levels had risen to 408Hi Michele - I was wondering how you were but after reading your post I am horrified by the way you have been treated. We all know that carrying extra weight can make us feel ill and depression can come with lots of other symptoms but you seem to have the weight gain and depression from being ill in the first place.Your doctor was very insensitive to your needs and sometimes I think doctors do this when they are at a loss and cant find an explanation to whats happening to you. Your best bet is to prove them wrong and lose weight ( sensible eating plan) boost your self esteem with life coaching courses and then go back and say to them "now what"? I have had some bad times with doctors but I saw a new rheumy today after trying to get in to see this doc for a long time as I wasnt too sure that RA was my problem and my old rheumy wouldnt listen. This new rhemy agrees that my problems could stem from lymes disease as i was bitten by a tick 12 years ago. I am off all meds apart from antibiotics over the last 7 weeks and I am walking without aid and have no pain and limited inflamation. So all along the docs could have been barking up the wrong tree.
I hope you get some help as well and focus on proving these doctors wrong.You know your own body better than anyone else so keep fighting for some help
Take care
MIchelle.
please please go over to the about thyroid board and post your story. Even if it is not the thyroid there are so many women with similar stories to yours that you will be given some ideas and possibly a doctor recommendation
Here is the link...I truly believe that these ladies (and men) can help you
http://thyroid.about.com/mpboards.htm
Maybe if you do go off the meds the doctors can then see what is wrong. Pred can mask a lot of things. AS bad as it seems to make yourself feel worse by purposly going off meds, at least your mind may be put at ease and you can begin to recieve proper treatment? I'm sorry you are being treated so unfairly and I hope you get more help/relief.I have two friends who are overweight and everytime they go in for the smallest of things the dr.s treat them like crap and blame it all on being overweight. Makes them feel even worse than they did going in. Some dr.s don't have the sensitivity God gave em. [QUOTE=SarahP]Maybe if you do go off the meds the doctors can then see what is wrong. Pred can mask a lot of things. AS bad as it seems to make yourself feel worse by purposly going off meds, at least your mind may be put at ease and you can begin to recieve proper treatment? I'm sorry you are being treated so unfairly and I hope you get more help/relief.[/QUOTE]
I've suffered from depression since my teens, had my weight go up to 270 lbs. on a 5'5" frame, and none of my docs ever said such cruel things to me. If you see a shrink for the depression, he might be able to find an RD or PCP who could actually help you. I'm sorry you're going through this, and will keep you in my prayers.
Please tell your hubby that you are not the first RA patient to be dismissed like this.
Oh Michelle...you were treated terribly...made me so angry when I read your post. Nothing much more to add to what's already been said...just please be careful with your meds (although I certainly do understand why you would want to stop like that) Please taper properly with the pred.
Michelle,
I am outraged at the treatment that you're receiving from all these doctors. I think the only one worth their weight is the pain management one. At least he is willing to admit there's a problem and be honest enough to say he doesn't know what it is. Possibly asking him for a recommendation for a new doc may give you someone in the medical profession who at least willing to help. If it does turn out that the other doctors were right, then fine. But if not, maybe someone new with more professionalism can find what's wrong and treat it. Fat and depressed are only the symptoms here. These docs aren't willing to look past them to find out what's truly going on. It's outrageous that your primary who has known you for 7 years can be swayed so easily by the opinion of the doc at U Of M.
I can understand why you're bagging up the meds and feel the way you do. I would want to bop one of these docs in the nose. There's something wrong and you know it. If there isn't anything wrong, why are they giving you all these meds? I'm sure these are questions you have also. Others have given you good advice. Don't just stop because doing so may put you in a worse position than you are now. You don't want to do that yourself regardless of these docs making you feel that this is the only way someone if going to listen to you. As someone else said, taper. I would even call the docs that have put you on this medication and tell them "considering the problem is me being fat and depressed, what purpose is this medication you have me on serving?"
None of these fools who call themselves doctor are willing to admit there's something wrong because they don't know what it is. The problem is not you, sweetheart, it's them, their incompetence and lack of compassion for their patients.
Hugs,
Steph
I know many plus-size people who get around quite well and are not depressed; I am still beyond pissed off that your doctors would dismiss all of your problems on your weight, instead of the other way around. GRRRRR!!!I agree with Suzanne: If they don't think you have RA why would they leave you on medications that can be so dangerous? That alone is neglect in my opinion. I hate the way you were treated sweetie. I'm so sorry that's happened. If the doctor's truely believe that the weight is contributing to so many different problems why on earth aren't they taking steps to help you get the weight off? If it is so out of control they should be making suggestions that can be helpful to you instead of beating you up further and contributing to an already depressing situation.
I think if I was you in your situation I think I would slowly but surely get off any medications that relate to all illnesses that they claim you now do not have despite the fact that they originally prescribed these medications to treat these illnesses. Sometimes these medications do more harm than good. Give it a try. It might take a little while; but it's worth a shot.
Try to refocus your energy on getting healthy through diet and any physical fittness that you can manage at this point. Maybe in a few months if you've been able to loss some weight you can go back to a doctor (I think I'd go to someone new-again) and let them know the steps you've taken to change the things they claim are causing your problems. I know weight loss isn't easy. I've been chipping away at these 20 extra lbs I don't want for a while now and I can surely feel for your struggle. It won't be easy but it might be worth it in the long run if for no other reason than to be able to say "See; I'm thin......now what smart ass!?"
Can you see someone about the depression? Not just someone that prescribes more medications that may or may not help; but someone that you can talk to? Bless your heart. You are dealing with so much. You need someone to talk. Someone that you feel is listening and not judging.....someone that you feel you don't have to be defensive around. It's obviously not your husband. I'm sorry but the way he talks to you is never helpful. You've mentioned his comments before and if he thinks he's being helpful he's so wrong. He is in no way supportive of you he should be ashamed of the way he speaks to you.
Hang in there Sweetie. I know we always say that......but we always mean it too. Don't give up. Stay strong.
Now I can't believe the things your boss has said to you!!!
What an asswipe!!! Is there anyone above him in the chain of command? That SOB has alot to learn about being a human being!
Completely agree with Janice re: your boss. That's out of line. Go over his head! He has no right to make the comments he has. [QUOTE=sgordon69]Completely agree with Janice re: your boss. That's out of line. Go over his head! He has no right to make the comments he has.[/QUOTE]I am not condoning going off pred so abruptly since you might already have something wrong with your adrenalin glands. But please do taper.
I would too stop taking meds and just seeing how it pans out. Pred does mask symptoms. I know for a fact that they do. Even when on just 5mg of pred will mask a lot of symptoms. You just do not realize it until you start to taper off that you have "new" symptoms.
I know just how you feel. I have been on predisone for 10 years and I feel i look like a freak. I am so swollen and I feel people are always staring at me. I am in a wheelchair and I am alot of trouble to go places so I feel my family rather not go with me anywhere. The doctor has tried all kind of drugs but nothing works so its more predisone. I get very depressed but I have a good husband and he helps pull me through. I can be very bitchy sometimes and I feel bad about that but I feel the medicine is driving me crazy. Doctos don't care they only want your money and insurance. Please be careful about just stopping your meds. I know that can be very dangerous.
I will pray for you and please pray for me. I feel only God my husban(poor thing) and my love for my grandchildren can get me through. My husband has seizures and has had a stroke so we are a weird pair just trying to get buy. Talk later
The same thing happened to a woman who lived next door to me. She was
Hi Michele, I am just in shock after reading your posts. I don't know of anything else to say that hasn't been said but I want you to know how sorry I am. The nerve of Dr's, who can't find the physical problem, resort to rudeness and name calling is reprehensible!. Your boss included!
So many times we've said hang in there dear and you have done great in dealing with this...please keep going and do the right things with your meds. As far as hubby goes he only knows what the Dr is saying and is probably frustrated, no excuse for his behaviour, and doesn't know how to deal! Heck women are nearly always the ones who has to deal with things, no offence guys guys but it's a generalized truth
Please know that you are in my prayers and we are all here for you. You have many friends here that know and love you just the way you are
Michele since we in europe became a union they (Brussels) are very big on 'human rights'. Your boss' behaviour is shocking and he is definitely breaching your human rights. You should be able to go to work without fear of his comments/intimidation. He is not allowed to behave this way.
You should not let him speak to you like this.... America is big on this sort of thing isnt it? You must go right up the chain of command to get this nipped in the bud. Keep a diary of dates, comments and witnesses.
At least your family here is thinking of you.Michele, Ok, so she tells you all of this, and she is all knowing and has
probably walked many miles in your shoes and she is also the one that
put you on all these meds.....Did she have a plan for you? I mean
certainly she had some sort of an idea of what you should do to maybe
wean off most of the meds, because I think some of your symptoms are
the meds they have you on. I agree with gimpy, you should find a good
osteo who will sort it all out and get you on the right road to recovery.
You need to have all systems looked at, not just your symptoms. gramma
and I looked at all your meds a while back and were a bit taken back by
all the interactions that could be taking place with all that you are on.
Please please please find another doctor, and please do not go off your
meds without some supervision. You will feel more crappy if you do and
like others have posted, could get you into some serious medical trouble
if you do. I also agree that doctors tend to blame the obesity asl the
major contributor to the problem. Obesity does cause a lot of systemic
inflammation so losing the weight will help you feel better but it is easier
said than done especially when you don't feel up to exercising.
Swimming may help and it is also very relaxing and may help take some
of the stress away. Please find a osteopathic doctor that will help you to
get you off the meds. The pred is not your friend, but you cannot go off
it cold turkey either. Please keep us posted. Thank you everyone, this board is the only thing that keeps me at least partly sane! My boss is an ass, he just is not a nice person. He is an optometrist and owns the practice, no one to complain to and jobs are hard to come buy in this economy, especially when you are not well for whatever reason! I have worked for him for almost 9 years and have learned to ignore most of his crap but sometimes its really hard to ignore.
Hubby is definitely less than supportive when it comes to the emotional stuff. He has been good about helping keep the house clean and cooking but he just doesn't get it, at all.
Anyone know how long before the fallout of stopping the pred and other drugs will take? I left my blood pressure patch with the dr yesterday and boy, I can feel that for sure. But, since its was only the pred making my bp goes up....her exact words "nothing you are on (medications) sustains life so you can stop them."
Its hard to tell right now what is medication withdrawal and what is from being so upset, not sleeping and not eating anything except for a weight watchers bar. I posted my picture in the picture thread, am I really THAT fat????? Overweight, definitely but really THAT FAT????
OMG you are risking malignant hypertension!
A friend of mine was on Vioxx, and it had caused him to have high blood pressure. He stopped taking Vioxx when it was withdrawn from the market and his doctor told him he could stop taking the blood pressure meds at the same time. BIG MISTAKE - he almost had a stroke. His blood pressure went through the roof and he was in the hospital for 3 days. Get a blood pressure monitor or if you can't afford one go to a pharmacy where they have the in-store blood pressure machines. And talk to your pharmacist! He/she can be a valuable member of your medical team.
No Michele. You are not that FAT. You do not looks to be too over weight. I am 5' 2" and fluctuate between 157 - 164. None of the dr's I have been to this time around told I was fat. I had one RD to tell me I was "mushy and flubby" her exact words. And she was talking about my tights and at that time I was weighting 133. I tried to tell that RD that my tights had always been like that since I was a kid, and no matter what exercise I done did nothing to tone them. She told me to walk a mile a day. Yeah... right!!! I tried to tell her I could not even walk a mile when I was in high school for gym. She said I was "not following doctor orders." SO, I quit going to her.
Much much Hugs!
Michele, you are not that fat. Yes, overweight, but you are tall so you canMichele, my dear friend, I am really sorry you have such a pack of stupid doctors. I don't think highly of your boss or husband or his family. How did you manage to get yourself surrounded by such a bunch of folks with no empathy?
By the way 5'8" and under 200 is not all that fat, it is just overweight like the rest of America. I might understand the stupid docs if you were at 350 lbs, but I'll never condone their attitude toward you even if you were morbidly obese.
At least your rhuemy knows you are not just fat and depressed. She would never have told you to stay on the humira and pred.
I would stay on the humira no matter what..until it is proven you do not have RA. But like you I think it might be a good idea to dump the pred. You do have to taper it. You can't just quit. It really both masks trouble and it certainly causes trouble both physically and emotionally.
Did you make an appt with a regular endocronologist (sp)? Since our hormones really run our bodies, it is a good bet something is out of kilter with you.
Anti depressants can really raise hell with your emotions especially if you are not on the right one. They can also cause a whole load of physical symptoms as well as emotional messes. Serzone made my joints so much worse (slowly over time) that I thought a miracle happened when I switched to Effexor because of insurance issues. Wellbutrin caused panic attacks (never had those before or since). Zoloft adversely affected my vision, kept having giant blue blind spots like when a flash bulb goes off in your face.
Don't let these clowns tell you you have an mental problem. There is way more to your misery than a bad attitude. Depression is a serious medical condition and your docs who believe that it is your major problem, have handled you so badly that it borders on mal practice.
Hang in and keep on trucking....continue to search for the truth. Hugs Michele.
There does happen to be an osteopath nearish you.......mine! I'd just encourage you to get one more opinion before you do something as drastic as what you're planning.Hi Michelle,
As for your boss, if he continues the way he is and you get sick of it, approach him and tell him it's offensive. If he doesn't stop, write him an email outlining the dates and offensive behavior. Make copies of email and dates/times of conversations regarding his behavior towards you. If he continues, you can take that information to the Labor Board. There is always someone to report this type of behavior to. Don't feel like you have to take it.
I didn't see what your boss said to you until after I saw someone mention it. OMG! I would freak out. My husband would come down there and freak out as well! And just because he's the boss doesn't mean you can't do anything about it.
I do however understand your desire not to rock the boat; but I would keep notes on his comments in case you ever need them in the future. You don't deserve that Sweetie. That's horrible.
Oh my god I wish I had more to say michele. :( I'm really sorry hun. I just want you to know that I'm thinking about you. And you are not crazy, I understand how your feeling. I can't say that I would feel any other way, after a doctor treats you like that!! *hugs*Hi Michelle, I'm not going to respond to how the doctor treated you or in this case not treated you....everyone before expressed my thoughts.
I will respond to your decisions re: meds.
My dear, you are going to be in big trouble in less than a week. This is not the way to get the medical attention you need and want. I don't think you realize that what you've done is life threatening. Bottom line is you could die.
Adrenal insufficiency can be very serious with side effects that are debilitating. I know I've been there. If it's not too late it can be reversed.
You know about the effects of severe hypertension. I don't need to offer you advice about hypertension.
Go back on the Pred. and wean 1 mg. each week till you're off it. There is always the possiblity that you have adrenal insuff. now. If you go below 5mg. and your adrenals don't kick in then you can develop many of the symptoms that you're now displaying.
Go back on your BP meds.
Find an osteopath or DO and get an appt. ASAP.
Make an appt. with your counselor if they're still in the picture or find a counselor who will see you ASAP.
EAT.
Like Lori, I think many of your symptoms are from the meds. But going off them cold turkey will only mask those symptoms by adding additional health problems to an already stressed body. Keep us posted. You have some work to do. Lindy.
Hi again, Michelle. That's good advice about documenting all that he says, dates, and times. One other thing that's important - include names of anyone else present. Good luck. Just to emphasize again what Lin said...Grrrrr. Michele, I'm so sorry. It makes me so mad I could spit. I don't have anything better to say than anyone else, they all have good advice. Just please know that you are loved and you do not deserve this kind of treatment.
And I wish I knew why some men are so insensitive.
A thousand hugs from me.
Michelle no matter how bad you're feeling right now you need to know this.What you say matters and what you are feeling is REAL! Don't let anyone tell you it's your imagination. Keep plugging away and don't give up. I can't say I know what you're feeling but I have had dozens of docs blow me off and tell me it was all in my head!!!THEY WERE WRONG!Michelle,
I read your post earlier today, and even with all of my own problems to occupy my time, I haven't been able to get the way you have been treated out of my mind. It's really horrific.
And yes, lots of doctors could potentially be wrong. Don't let the numbers deter you. As others have said here already, only you really know your body and if something is wrong.
As an example, just this very afternoon, I finally got "medical confirmation" that something is indeed wrong with my shoulder. Apparently the results of an MRI that I had to absolutely BEG to have done show that I have a torn rotator cuff. I've been dealing with this "shoulder thing" for a full year, during which time I have seen countless docs of varying specialties while in the process of being diagnosed with RA and Fibromyalgia. Each and every one of these Docs has told me that there was nothing wrong with my shoulder though. And now they want to talk about surgery?
My point here, is that as much as it sucks, you do need to keep searching for the right Dr / right test if you are experiencing these symptoms. And I can totally relate to feeling/being judged for weight, depression etc. causing your "problems" as opposed to it being the other way around". I actually went so far as to bring a picture (date stamped June 2006) of myself in a bikini (no joking) to my last RD appt along with a ribbon from a 10k in an effort to just put to bed the issue of what was causing what with me.
Best of luck to you in getting through this tough time and I am really sorry that you have had to endure such rotten treatment at the hands of enough jerks to cause you to question your own judgement.
Michelle. I dont know if you have any one like this near you, but could you find a volunteer medical ombudsman? most hospitals have one, so do nursing homes etc. someone who can act as a go between for you and your dr who has no vested interest except assuring proper and appropriate treatment?
Call your local hospital, the county dept of health, dept of the aging, or the state insurance board may be able to give you information. You have got to find a way to make someone listen.
I agree with who ever said to ask your dr.. "well if you feel I dont have RA, then why am I on Humira".. also make someone write down a treatment plan.
and I agree please dont just stop taking your meds.. taper, and eat.
I hope you print out this entire thread and mail it to that doctor.
Michelle,
I am sorry that you have not gotten the support of your doctor to partner with you to find symptomatic relief. We almost don't care if they label our conditions just so long as they treat us.
Don't give up on getting help for yourself. You deserve better treatment than you've been given.
Hope things get better for you soon. Don't give up on meds that are helping.
Michelle,
I am so upset over how you are being treated by the drs. I do not think your weight is that bad for your height. I have gained 25 lbs in the last 2 years, putting me at nearly 160 and I am only 5'3" and petite (or was, anyway) and my drs have told me I shouldn't be worried about it right now. I have had almost nothing for them to go on diagnostically, and was blown off by a number of drs before I finally found one that would take me seriously. Then it took another year before anything was found in bloodwork. Before this I felt just like you, I would cry and stop taking my meds and just get sicker and have to start again. I am just telling you this because it feels utterly hopeless right now but you really can't give up. Rest and take your meds and try to let it go for now. You need time to work through these emotions before you make any decisions. You are in my prayers. Let us know how you are doing.
Laker
Please don't give up! My aunt has been going through something similar to this and just found out that there was something seriously wrong with her. She is overweight and the RD she was refered to told her that the weakness and swelling she had was just because she was fat. Her primary care listened to that recommendation. Finally it got so bad she ended up in the ER, only to find she has a tumor on her spine. They did surgery last week to see if it is cancerous. The ER doc also says he believes she has RA like we first suspected. It was at her insistance that something was wrong that they did a MRI and found the tumor. You know your body best! Loose weight, but keep searching for someone who will listen!Dear Michele - I read the photo thread first and when I saw yours, I thought "what a beautiful young woman", and then I remembered all the problems you have had and I was even more impressed. If your internist has diagnosed you as "fat and depressed", what is her treatment plan? Or was she just labelling you to cover up her inability to help in any way? What do docs expect after putting someone on pred? If you are indeed overweight, how can they pass off the blame? And of course you are depressed, depression goes hand in hand with these diseases, and deepens with each encounter with an unfeeling MD. I wish you only the best, please keep us posted as to how you are doing. I so hope you can find a doc who can help. Pat
I am truly touched by all the support everyone has shown me here. I so much needed that, thank you everyone.
Oh Michelle, I'm so nervous and scared for you right now. I understand that you're feeling this will show them but honey, My God, please at least eat something. Starving yourself to death will only show them that they were all right and it is a mental issue. I can feel that you're at the end of your rope. I can even understand why you would be. Please reconsider this route.
Love and hugs,
Steph
Michele , you definetly are Not fat or obese. You really have lot going for you. Your boss is an ass and you really dont have to tolerate his behaviour towards you. I know what you are saying about needing the job but being spoken to like that isnt in the job description. Please dont let him do it.Who the hell does he think he is?
I have just got off the telephone to my friend and she is having a lot of problems with her joints and swelling also hurting bad. She has seen lots of Doctors and the last one told her Lose weight you are too fat. She has recently lost 3 stone and had a hysterectomy too.Her joints are worse than ever.She is leaking milk but is definetly not pregnant and tonight she was in tears with swelling in her hands and feet. Her Dr told her its not RA ( THAT WAS A DIAGNOSIS WITH OUT BLOOD TESTS OR XRAYS) She is to see another dr next week and a rheumatologist the week after. Drs dont know everything.
You really need to eat more than cereal and cottage cheese. That wont help you loose weight properly and a low fat balanced diet would be better.
Take care
Michele, if you don't eat as many calories in a day as you burn, you will NOT lose weight. Trust me, I have been down that path. Why don't you wander over to www.sparkpeople.com and set up an account. You don't have to use the site, but it will give you a good idea of how many calories you need to eat, to still function, and lose weight at a healthy rate. Once you have that number, you can work out whatever system you'd like for losing weight. Don't eat about 2 hours before you go to bed, too. That'll help you lose weight. If you don't already, drink water, LOTS AND LOTS of water. Not only is it good for you, it'll help flush out impurities, and speed up losing weight. Hunny I can give a hundred good easy tips to lose weight the healthy way, I don't want to see you any sicker than you already are!!
Everyone here cares about you very much as you can see from our posting. I know you feel like you've hit the bottom, and girl, in some ways you have. But we are here to help pull you out of that hole and get back on track. Regardless of what your doctor says one day to the next (we can tell shes nuts) we do NOT think you're crazy, or fat, or it's all in your head. AT ALL. But we do care very much about you and do not want to see you fall further into this hole.
KWIM? We love you girlie, take some time and think about it, kay?
Okay, I'm just getting caught up on this thread. And this is a topic that really frustrates me. By calling you fat and dismissing your symptoms as being related to your weight, doctors are basically telling you it's all your fault and shame on you for letting this happen! Sure gets them off the hook. Well shame on them for not carrying about the person inside. They no longer care about anything we say, they can't see beyond the fat. I have had the same things happen to me over the years, and it really angers me! Here's one, just one example:
I would v