I have posted a few times before and everyone has been so wonderful! So, I really need to speak to people that understand. I just got married in June. The month after I got married my husband (who is just 22 yrs old) got laid off from his job. Okay, I can deal with that, we are able to get through this. Well, the first of Aug. I had to go the the ER with my shoulder...that's the major joint affected. My Rheumy was out of town that week, so they had to send me to a new MD for a shot in my shoulder joint. The bill from the hospital visit was 7.00 and after my 0.00 payment to the other MD and a bill just came and I owe him 7.00 more. If you haven't already guessed, I don't have any insurance. So, now my new husband is in debt for the first time in his life. Now don't get me wrong....He is a wonderful man and very understanding. He really takes great care of me, doesn't get upset when I am bitchy or can't do things because of the RA. I just feel so much guilt! He knew I had RA before we got married (dated for 2 years first) but I feel horrible. He doesn't deserve this. This last few weeks have been hell for me. Super short handed @ work and I have been totally stressed & wiped out from this. Plus, I haven't been sleeping worrying about all these bills. I think Tuesday night I slept a total of 45 minutes and had to work on Wednesday because there was no one else to do it. I feel like I am flaring up but don't feel like I can go to the Rheumy because of $ and work. But it's just not that. As most of you know, this sh*ty disease isn't going to just go away anytime soon. And even though I told him prior to us getting married I don't think people really understand without first hand knowledge. RA SUCKS! I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. I don't really have anyone to talk to about all this without feeling more guilty about making my family feel bad. Especially my husband who is having such a hard time without a job, with us just getting married and feeling like he is responsible to take care of his family.
Anyone else have these kind of thoughts or problems. Just a word or to would help. I feel so helpless right now. Thank you for taking the time to read my sob story.
Elda
Dear Elda, I'm so sorry you must go through such a trial at your young age. You can talk to the hospital and explain your situation, they will reduce your debt, also if you talk to your doctor he may help you more with 'free' meds and samples. People on here have great info for you on how to get some temporary help with medications. I'm sure that they will post.
Of course you feel awful, and that he didn't know what this disease does to people, but honestly NO one knows what's around the corner. You both sound like lovely people.
I'm sure he will get a job soon (no one wants to be in debt, but you need medical attention) and it sounds like you need to try to stay calm as you are the 'bread winner' at the moment. It is good that you can work. When you are young everything feels so overwhelming and scary, the unknown especially.
I'm glad you found the forum, many young people (some with families) are going through tough times, like loss of a job and pain so they can't work. I know they will write you soon.
Please PM me anytime, and we are here 24/7, you deserve to be upset, it is a normal reaction. Please feel free to talk about your fears.
I'm so sorry,Lynda
what about unemployment for him?
i know in florida when you get laid off you can collect unemployment till you find a new one and sometimes you take what you can tget and they supplement the pay to a certain point
Isn't there any COBRA insurance from your husband's job? That would kick in immediately upon his leaving and last for a year, I think. If he had insurance while employed, I believe by law he has to be offered COBRA.
I'm really sorry to hear of all you're going through right now. The good news is, you're young and in love and that will help so much, probably more than you know right now. You have a built-in support system with your husband and many people here who want to help. I'm glad you took the time to share your current trial, and we're all pulling for you. Please keep us posted.
Fairyelda -
Your shoulder? Are you RA or Palindromic RA? How long have you had RA? What meds are you on?
Hugs,
Pip
thanks for all your replies....the only debt we have are my medical bills. That's why I feel so crummy! I know that I can make minim payments. I haven't had insurance for about 31/2 years. I was Dx with Ra about 5 years ago. I have tried them (drugs) all! And I have qualified for the drug assistance programs with Remicade and now with the Humira that I am taking. I don't mind being on the assistance programs.... the meds are more than I make in an entire month. But I just hate having the other bills hinging over my head. It's going to take me forever to pay them off! My husband gets about 0.00 a week on unemployment, as for COBRA he got laid off right when we were going to get me on his insurance...go figure!
But I know everything will work out and I really have a lot to be thankful for, it's just hard sometimes as you ALL know. It just seems to overwhelm every now and then.
Thanks again
Love Elda
< =text/>_popupControl(); ((((hugs))) I know this is a rough time right now for you and your hubby. There are many of us that have been right where you are right now. So please know you are not alone in what is going on. My husaband and I have medical debt that we are slowly but surely paying off.
Nana had great advice on what do when you can't sleep because the medical debt is running thru your mind. What she said works for any issue that someone is having. My husband recently went thru a bout of insomnia and we wrote out a plan on what was troubling him and it did help him to sleep. You can also try some Melatonin. You can get it at any pharmacy or Walmart etc. It is a natural supplement that I hear works really well. Also, if you haven't, try some relaxation breathing, soothing music or sounds on CD or tape, or even some meditation. Somtimes when I can't sleep...I watch some mindless TV (Lifetime Movie Network always has some movie going), I catch up on my DVR'd shows, or I read.
Just remember, this situation is temporary and something that can be resolved. Maybe not resolved overnight, but it will be resolved. I know it can be difficult to find work, but I really think your husband will find something suitable for him very quickly.
Hang in there hunny and we are here for you!!!
Oh Hunny do I EVER understand. My hunny has severe Chrons and has been in and out of the hospital the past two years. In fact, all of last year he barely worked and I supported us. We have medical debt, and quite frankly at this point we don't even care. We were at a point where we COULD NOT PAY, and now the hospital is no longer willing to help us, so they just won't get their money! We ended up finding a non-profit hospital that put him on a charity list for a year. As long as we took him to that hospital, they paid for EVERYTHING. That took a lot off of our minds. The other hospital, well that's just a bad situation they're corrupt anyway and constantly in the news. Matter of fact, they were just sued (and lost) in a wrongful death case.
Anyway, what I'm getting at - out of all the debts to have in life, medical is the LEAST of your worries. I know it's terrible to think that you owe these people all this money, but it HAPPENS. It happens because people can't get insurance, or can't afford the leftovers that insurance doesn't cover. You have bigger fish to fry in life right now than letting a medical debt run you. I'm not saying ignore it, but don't let it take over. Call the hospital, like every one said, and try to sort something out with them. If they don't co-operate you can try looking elsewhere for help, but in the mean time don't worry one bit about what they say to you. You can't pay them anything if you're not well, right?!?!?
Anyway, I just wanted to let you know you're not the first one to hit this bump, and yes, it's a hellofa bump!!!!! *hugs* hang in there! Oh, and my and my b/f are 24 so I REALLY get it.
P.S. - medical debt drops off your credit after 7 years.
Oh, thank goodness you're getting some help!
Hugs,
Pip
I hope I don't sound too dumb but what's the difference in this statment???
RA or Palindromic RA
Elda,
So sorry to hear what you are going through. I am sure it will all work out. I have medical debt too, but I ay JUST the minimum balance, some 10$ a month. I think as long as you are sending SOMETHINg they are happy. Please don't feel guilty! After all, it's not like you went out and racked up debt for something frivolous! It's your health. You need to take care of yourself. I am sure your hubby feels the same way.
< =text/>_popupControl(); Robin...you are not stupid and there are NO STUPID QUESTIONS!!!!
Palindromic RA is one of the many different types of rheumatoid arthritis. Here is a link that will help you with the answer to your question. There are a few here who have Palindromic RA but I can't remember whom.
http://www.hopkins-arthritis.org/ask-the-expert/index.php?ac tion=article&cat_id=008&id=313
I'm Palindromic -
It hits the big joints first. It comes and goes - usually just before a MD appointment. Of all the Autoimmune diseases - this has the highest natural remission rate. Up to 50% according to some researchers.
We do not necessarily get joint damage.
50% remit on their own - no meds.
Of the remaining 50%, half never get damage.
The other half moves on to regular RA.
The attacks are 'gnaw your arm off pain' and usually asymetrical. Until we move on.
Pip