Ok, so I am a teacher, and I get the grade reports for my son this morning. The boy is failing four out of nine classes in High School.
My first instinct is to shave his head again and enroll him in boot camp!!! (he does have longish hair)
He is a wonderfully creative boy that BMX's his life away and draws the other part. The classes he is failing are Driver's Ed(yep...don't get that one, but he is not turning stuff in like in 6th grade), History, Biology, and Graphic Design(drawing, but the teacher seems a little anal about simple drawings, and Brandon is a proficient artist). He is very bright, but has zero motivation to get good grades.
So these are my thoughts...the bike is so gone until he is passing his classes for a long time, and the understanding will be at the first D...it's gone! I have thought about trailing him to classes to monitor behavior. I have seriously thought about cutting the hair. I have also seriously thought about HOMESCHOOLING!!! Then part of me is thinking....He has got to take some RESPONSIBILITY in all of this. I just wish I had a guarentee that the school district would fail him, but we tried this in sixth grade and NO ONE would take a stand.
Gosh...I wish he were ten again, life would be soooo much easier. I hate this position.
How can that boy be failing drivers ed...isnt that usually the one class they want to do good in? Sorry i know that doesnt help. I think taking the bike away is a great idea. Another would be monitering his homework..Making sure that he IS doing it and ALL of it before he can do anything else, if he can even do anything at this point. And get progress reports from each of his teachers that he is failing in and if he starts to do better slowly allow him more and more privledages (sp?), also another idea is not to let him be w/ his friends..make him stay home till those grades are up. Maybe have a meeting w/ his teachers to see where exactly his problem lies that way you have an easier time to see where he needs the help.
Hope it helps...good luck hun! Hey and military school might not be to bad of an idea
He sounds like my son's clone Shelley. And yes, he does need to accept some of the responsibility for himself, that is the mistake I think we made. Jordan always hated school and I think we exascerbated the problem by letting him get his own way a abit too much. But like Deanna says, I would also break things down into bite size chunks. If you take his bike away for forever he will see no point in pulling it together. Jordan is also very artistic and that seemed to be the only subject he passed (apart from Wood Shop). Gentle guidance but also being firm about what is expected would be the first option. He had a rough couple of years and got involved in drinking a lot of alcohol and tha lead to depression and cutting etc which caused a lot of pain to all of us. He has been working for about 7 months now and is slowly getting himself together. I wish we could talk him into an apprenticeship in furniture building, but maybe when he grows up a bit more inside his head. He has always been very immature in his behaviour.
ps. He is 21 and still doesn't have his license. He has 2 pair of roller blades, 2 long boards (skateboards) and 2 bikes (one is a downhill mountain racer worth about 2 grand that he has bought from his friend). He rides his bike to work. My feeling is, he has enough wheels to get himself around and maybe he will mature some more before he ends up behind the wheel of a car.
I too have a 14 year old I think it is an age thing in some kids lol
'My oldest son went through it too, he was very suuccessful in school after failing 9th grade and then struggled to make up for it the next three. He is now in the army AND IS A VERY BRILLANT PERSON ALMOST TOO SMART i THINK.Creative people tend to have this problem and it is very hard for them to conform. In 8th grsade he riefused to do homework as he could not see a purpose to it. Said he learned everything in class and unfortunately i beieved him but that didnt make him get the grades. I tried taking his favorite thing away the - the computer- He went without it a whole year and a summer lol said he didnt care he had better things to do,. He was an avid reader with a photographic memory. Unfortunetly I couldnt take the books away. I am sur ehtis will pass- If he had a mentor or a person that was not biased by being a parent it might help. My son found wrestling- it changed his life. The advanced placement biology teacher even called him at home and personally asked him to take his class his senior year as he needed students or they were drooping his class from the cirriculum- my son had staight as in that class all year. He will come around just dont give up
Thank you so much, and you all are great. I do know his friends and they hang out at our house. I regularly go up to the skate park...where he rides unannounced. Most of his friends call me mommy...just like he does.
I do think giving him some time to unwind is warrented, but I agree with after the homework is checked. I have emails out to all of his teachers, and will constantly keep in contact with them. I am also fighting against hubby, who seems to think he doesn't need any priviledges at all.
Yep, Shannon...that was my reaction...How in the H*ll do you Fail Driver's ED???? He is just not doing work. He is very social, and very creative. I guess it may be time to see the school counsellor too.
Thank you so much. You have given me a lot to think about. Most of all I do not want to ruin our relationship. I am his only ali, and that is his words. He and his father don't see eye to eye, because he is so creative (and like his mommy).
[QUOTE=kelsaysmommy]How can that boy be failing drivers ed...isnt that usually the one class they want to do good in? [/QUOTE]
Ummm... yeah, Shannon... I was just barely passing Drivers ED. And here I am 28 and still with a learner's permit, can only drive with another licensed driver in the car.
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