1 or 2 good things about RA! | Arthritis Information

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Ok everyone.  I am in a good positive frame of mind lately despite the current health circumstances.  I think we should all post 1 or 2 good things that have happened in your life since being diagnosed with RA.  So despite having RA…what are 1 or 2 good things that having RA has brought into your life? 

 

I can tell you that having RA has brought me closer to my family.  Since I have not been able to work either full or part time for the past couple of years, I have really become closer to my family.  I have found that the relationship that I have with my girls has grown by leaps and bounds.  I have found that despite me having limitations, they really don’t care about that.  All they care about is that I am around and there for them whether it is on bed rest or not.  My husband and I are also closer.  Having RA has done wonders for our relationship and bringing us closer together and we actually communicate better now. 

 

I have become more active in health care rights.  I have written letters and have been published in a magazine regarding the state of our health care in this country.  I have become more active in ensuring that everyone has adequate health care despite their job or income circumstances.  I have been able to connect people with resources to help them out in tough times and resources to help people get medications paid for.  If I didn’t have RA, I wouldn’t have known about these resources and I probably would not be as active in health care rights. 

It allowed me to see things from a different perspective, and as a result, I have much more empathy for others (like my husband, for instance!) with chronic health issues

My wife was diagnosed with RA some years ago. I thought I understood her limitations, but now that I have it in a big way, I really appreciate her much more. It has brought us closer togather.

I retired early and it was the best thing I've ever done.  Stan and I are able to travel and spend time together.  I've had more time to devote to writing.  I volunteer whenever I'm needed.  This is the good side of having RA.  Lindy

This is a hard one for me today. 

I would say learning to let go of things and not need to have them perfect.  Also learning to let people help you.

I'm still working on all that, but RA has pushed me along the path.

RA has made me rearrange my priorities in life to what really matters for me. It has also revealed the depth of my partners commitment, caring and love for me. Also, in some preverse way, it has made me into a more positive thinker.

The good things I have found in RA?  Like Jas said, having suffered beyond what I ever thought possible, I am able to understand better and empathize with others that are suffering or disabled in some way.

I know many wonderful people who truely care about me, more than what I realized.

That God is my faithful friend, even during the darkest times.  He has kept His promise to never leave me or forsake me.

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It is wonderful to see all the positive things that can come from what can be such a horrible life changing disease.  I am seeing a lot of us that have become closer to our spouses also.  That to me, is a huge bonus in life.  There seems to be a common theme in the positive things that have come from having RA.  Most of us have taken a different outlook on life and did some rearranging of priorities to include more time spent with family. Many of us gained more empathy for other people also. 

 

Why did I make a post like this?  I just want to show that there are silver linings to every cloud.  It doesn’t happen overnight that we see the positive things that we have gained from having RA.  If you don’t see anything positive in your life right now, that is ok.  Eventually, those positive things will come to you.  It really just takes time.  I also wanted to do this because we have had an influx of newly diagnosed people and people searching for others with RA that can understand what they are going through lately on the board and I want them to see despite what you are going through right now, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. 

 

Keep coming up with these great things!!!

As a young person with RA (I'm 20), it made me realise that I'm not invincible. Some might say this is a bad thing but I don't think so. I know I won't always have tomorrow and that some things can't wait. That if you really want something you have to go out and fight for it now, not in 3 days, 3 months or 3 years time. I've learnt to appreciate everything I can do today, which I may not be able to do tomorrow.

I'm learning to live in the now, not in the future, not in the past. And this is possibly the best thing RA has taught me - don't focus on futures that might not happen and don't waste time regretting the past. Live in the present.

RA has made me

1) slow down and concentrate more

2) rush off and have fun whenever possible

:-)

Pip

It gave my body lots of practice being old.  By the time I get there I'll have it down pat!!!! (lol)

No it taught me at a young adult age that I cannot stress over things I can not change.  And that by whining and complaining all I do is drive people away

 

RA has taught me to SLOW way, way down.  I was always going a mile a minute and always had too much on my plate.  I still work full time, but I have reduced the amount of credits I teach.  I even had to buy myself a "chair" to sit in.  I never sat down without a project in my hand or a load of laundry to fold so I never needed my own chair.  RA has allowed me to stop and think and be. 

I have dealt with fairly severe depression on and off my entire adult life.  I haven't had any depression in the last 2 years that I have had RA.  Go figure 1. I've learned to never, ever, pass a restroom without using it.
2. I've learned that sitting in silence sipping tea with a friend is sometimes the most healing thing there is.
3. I've learned that my dog knows when I'm feeling particularly bad and she would make me a grilled cheese sandwich if she had thumbs. (This knowledge makes me strive to be the person she thinks I am.)

Not to take things for granted. 

Being even more grateful for the family I love who have always been there for me.

How fortunate I am to have friends that are truly friends. 

Not  worrying about the small stuff.

midnitestich39384.9527893519When I was forced to stop farming, I rediscovered my gardens.  Now that I am having to be more selective in my gardening, I am rediscovering each individual bloom.

I have more time to write and work on the the art that's been running through my head all my life and is now making it into the world.

I have learned that it is ok to take care of myself - something I'm trying to teach Stan.

 

What I have learned...I must say first that this is hard today...after a night of complete and utter pain and numbness:

1.  It has changed how I view my worth.  I was adopted at 12 and my worth became what I could do or how well I performed.  I was a perfectionist at school (graduating with a 4.0), and then just working like a man for my dad (mining contractor).  This pattern has followed me all my life.  Yep, even putting in my own toilet, while hubby was deployed.  Now, I  cannot even lift the toilet lid some days...so I have had to redesign the very core of my achievement.

2.  It has changed the way hubby and I relate.  Usually we had to compare calendars and make dates to talk, but now my calendar is open, and it has changed the "love language" that we used to use, into something that really fits us a lot. 

3.  I think it has changed my son even more.  He is more consciensious of the fact that girls are not supposed to do all of the heavy lifting.  He always makes sure that everything heavy is done before he leaves the house...and then gives me resting instructions(like I need them!)

4.  It has changed my daughters invincibility ideas.  She is also more considerate of sick friends, and the rest she gets, so she does not bring illness into the house.  She has always been very considerate of my resting time, but now she will take things from me and finish them...so I will go and lay down.  She also can judge how I am doing by the look in my eyes...apparently my eyes change color when I am in pain.  Weird!!!

First, allow me to thank all of you for sharing your thoughts and feelings with me, and to Grammaskittles for introducing the topic.

As I mentioned elsewhere I am currently in a very self-centered state of mind (by necessity), so ask your indulgence with my hopefully brief addition---

I have learned to be as kind and considerate of myself as I am of others, that patience truly IS a virtue, that manana is _almost_ always an option, that saying I love you-and meaning it-can bring the sunshine into even the darkest day and that a smile from a stranger can be a gift, that I do not have to do “it” all, that asking for help in not a sign of weakness or laziness but is, rather, the fortitude of self-awareness and the bulwark of self-understanding… … …

Further, I have learned that sharing my heart, mind, and spirit with others is therapeutic on every level.I feel as if I'm at a disadvantage being diagnosed at such a young age .... I don't know anything different.

I often wonder what its like in the "real world" to go through a little of life "normal".  It angers me that I'll never know the answer.  I fight this anger and frusteration on a daily basis.  God has helped me with this and without that help I wouldn't be here today.

RA hasn't brought me closer to my hubby or kids.  They all do have some understanding of what I go through.  It not only frusterates me, but hubby and kids too.

Someone told me to start a journal.  I don't like journals - this is as close as I'll ever get to one.  I did switch it around a little though.  I have begun a journal for each of my children.  I write down my thoughts, feelings, advice, etc.  I have let them each pick out which journal they liked best because journals come in many different colors and designs.   I know my life will be shorter than the average and this way they will have a written memory of me that is theirs personally.  I don't write the same thing in each one, but it is like a letter to them from me.

I have learned that I need to laugh at myself because if you can't laugh at yourself, you're too serious.  I make it really really easy to laugh at myself though, so this one is easy I guess at least I am a "Dear valued disabled customer" according to wal-mart anyways. I had to stop working so I spend more time with my family - unstressed - which is a good thing; having less money seems unimportant in comparison.

Also, I'm grateful to have been born when and where I was, as the medications which are around now and which I have access to make my illness manageable.

anna
Liz you are a good strong women. I am so proud of you. Having RA got me to this board and i get to chat with wonderful people. In my opinion the strongest most genuine caring people on the planet. I feel i have been blessed by this oportunity.
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