Helps to be productive | Arthritis Information

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I have been tutoring for three weeks now.  I love the work.  I hate my boss.  I was going to a very stressful meeting regarding my daughter and was concerned I would not be in good shape afterward to tutor.  I called the parents and asked if we could re-schedule.  They did not have a time to re-schedule so I said I would come over anyway.  Mom said "no, we do not want you coming if you are not up to it" so I said I will call when meeting was over.  Turned out I was fine after meeting and called to say I could come.  They had made other plans.  I had to call my boss and I told her that the parent was fine with it as she has lupus and knows I have RA.  My boss went on a rant.  How unprofessional it was of me to tell the parents I have RA.  How in the future - I cannot tell parents I have RA as it would "worry them"   This is the first tutoring appt. I have tried to re-schedule due to my RA and she said "if you cannot be dependable due to your RA, maybe this will not work out". BITCH.  This company makes an hour while I tutor and pays me .  That is why they do not want to see cancellations.  They do not pay me for transportation, meetings, prep. - only tutoring.  I put a lot of time into the prep. but I actually enjoy it.  I can live with only being paid for tutoring time because I LOVE LOVE LOVE the kids and their parents.  I have been amazed that my teaching skills have all come back to me and I really am proud of the work I am doing.  I will not make much money in the end as my aide is a sliding scale so I will have to start paying for her. 

 
Having said all this I just want to say - what a difference in my life it has made to be productive - get outside my disease and do something for someone else.  I treasure this job so pray that I do not miss sessions.  My boss is a bitch so I just avoid communicating with her.  Also - I have taken up knitting.  Wow - I must be doing better.  Thanks for listening.  Roxanne
Isn't it illegal of him to threaten you due to your RA???  I'm thinkin' it is. Show 'em your balls, and tell him you know your rights. Congrats on your new job Roxy.  I knew that you would do well.  As far as your boss goes, please remember that she has a job to do too and perhaps she was having a bad day.  If she did not want you to mention your RA, she should have told you that in the very beginning and if she didn't, shame on her.  Kill her with kindness Roxy.  It will make her feel guilty as heck. 
Formally now & then......Good luck!
Hi Roxy, so happy to see you posting, congratulations on your teaching position.  Onwards and upwards!!!!!  Well done.  I too think that your boss should not have said that to you, and maybe if he had a disease that affected him daily, he would not be able to hide it!!!!!  I find its best to be upfront with people or they end up asking me whats wrong as I can't be totally normal looking depending on the day.  Keep up the great work and give him a kick for me, love Janie.XX

Hi Roxanne!

What a total loser your boss sounds? She actually sounds like my ex-husband! I wasn't to tell people I had RA either - I had shamed him! What a joke!
She cannot tell you who you can share your experiences with. In fact, I think it would help them especially having Lupus - I have RA/Lupus and I sure would have respected a teacher sharing their experience with me. Is there somewhere else you can work? Now that you know how much you enjoy it and that your skills are refreshed?
You are so right though about keeping going with things - I do voluntary work for families who have a member with a disability and it keeps me going emotionally and mentally. Keep up the good work and good luck with your loser boss!
Its good to see you posting, Roxy.  Just keep moving on as if your boss had spoken to you in another language.  Life is good, don't let someone else take that away.   I can see the boss's point of view.  The problem isn't the RA so much as it is burdening the client with the personal information.  A simple "I am unable to attend today's session; when would you like to reschedule" would have been more appropriate. It doesn't really matter if it's because of RA, or PMS, or herpes, or bad attitude day, or whatever.

Just my 2 cents after working for years as a consultant.  Always keep a professional distance. JasmineRain2008-02-10 09:46:08When you are a tutor you become close with your student's and their parents. If you don't  you can't get into their heads and figure out the w best way to help them learn. Telling them if you have a health condition that could sometime affect your teaching is not only professional, it increases the human aspect.
 
Roxy's boss was wrong.
 
Obviously  its unprofessional to drone on and on complaining about your aches and pains ( and I am in NO way saying Roxy did that!!!)  heck I've met regular classroom teachers whose students knew about every bunion and hangnail...  but a heads up is fine.
 
Your boss is an idiot.
 
 
I agree with Jas.  It probably had nothing to do with the RA, it was more of a professional thing.  It is inappropriate to discuss personal matters (health or otherwise) on the job or in any other professional setting. 
PhatsI totally get what you're saying and one reason.. that i so want a CAR!!!
 
so i can be Productive, and give back and do things..
 
As far, as telling the clients about your RA... 2 different thoughts on it.. w/ the mom, w/ Lupus she gets it.. others may feel its a burden.. they just want someone that can do the job and not hear about sickness things.. shrug..
 
I've had different providers and honestly, when they started telling me about their physical stuff, it drove me crazy.. bc one... they were there to help me.. and it just made me feel guilty, when i had to ask them to do things.. but thats a different situation...
 
I think it just depends on the person.. and individual situation.... as far as work goes, people just want someone that can do the work and be there when needed.
so i guess i agree more w/ jas and phats..
 
(and remember you don't have to tell your boss everything!  I tell my client's parents hoping they will be more understanding if I have to re-schedule.  You know RA as well as I do.  It is unpredictable.  I wanted to give the parents a heads up - I did not or would not whine about my condition, I just want to be fair to them.   My appts. are only one to two hours at a time so that leaves a lot of room for flexibility.  I took this job because that is my hope - I do a good job - which I do - and parents will accept the fact that sometimes I just can't get out of the house.  Any other job, I probably could not keep.  I work 4-5 days a week - those are a lot of flare free days.  So far so good but when I found out I did not get paid for meetings with my boss I made her fit MY schedule.  She does not love it but if I am not getting paid for it - she should be flexible.
 
Anyway, it is good to hear from you.  The new AI format I am still getting used to but it feels good to stop by once in awhile and see what is up with you guys.  I am glad I do not have the time anymore for the computer very often but checking in on AI is one of my favorite things to do when I have the time.
 
Take care and blessings to all of you.  My life seems full of blessings these days and I am grateful.
I get what you are saying Roxy about your boss. You know, I do not like the way the world is sometimes. What happened to people being individual and human! Judge less and feel more! that doesn't hurt, it's a hard enough world as it is. My feeling is that you do what is right for you - just because others may not agree doesn't mean it isn't right for you. And sometimes, you just don't get on with people and that is that and at least you are aware of the personality clash between you and your boss. Don't ever be sorry that you're an open person and it doesn't hurt to be human - professional doesn't mean insensitive and hard. You can still be professional and REAL! Good luck with it all!Hi Roxy, check your email and 4RA talk, love Janie.XX  (message awaits you my friend)xx
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