Do you ever just over think your swelling?

Normally my left elbow is not much of a bother. The rest of my joints they always cause problems. Anyway my left elbow is rather swelled. So i was looking at it to see if it was better or worse. Then i notice this dent where i had gotten my blood drawn. Of course that was over two weeks ago.

Then i notice a lump above the dent. It is a little fimer and more raised than the other swelling.

Anyway my stupid paraniod imagination. I can not tell you the things i can think of that i scare myself with. I mean my wrists and knees and what ever else are swelling and thats all it is.

Alright i lean a little on the paraniod obsessive cumpulsive hypochondriac side of life. So i am thinking oh my how bad is this disease for me. I am just stuck here grounded with swoolen knees. So i have nothing more entertaining to do then think up some terrible demise for myself. How awful is that.

Well i guess i could eat something. I could just get fat and that may turn out to offer a bit of entertainment.

I guess what i am trying to say is i am really bored. This stinks. I want to run. I want to leap tall buildings with a single bound.

It is easy to get bored when you cannot do the things you want and love to do, because of limited ROM from swelling.

My hands and fingers are joining in on the swell party. They hurt. I cannot pick little things up or hold a pen. It sucks! But... I can still eat a cookie and watch TV! But then there has to be something good on TV to watch... LOL!

the other day I developed an ingrown fingernail.. its JUST a teeny tiny little spot.. well this morning I found myself describing the pain as "excruciating." good grief

NO its NOT excruciating.. its barely in the realm of mildly annoying..

I poke and prod at everything, and the least little thing turns into OMG ANOTHER RA problem.. umm no.. stubbing my toe in the dark is because I didn't set the vaccum back where it belongs, not because RA causes me to stumble..

I'm in a place right now where my perspective is all wrong.. I'm tired of acting this way.

I am not very patient with this. I do not think i should be. Seriously I am usually due a break at this point. This is what keeps me going. I think to myself I am three months into this flare. So I started getting worse two days ago. I told myself it should be over any day now. My usual history is that i flare for about three months then get a bit of a break. Last break was only a month and a half between swelling.

Not really working that way for me at the moment. It has been a over three months actually.

Then i tell myself. I think my elbow did flare up at the very last right before i quit swelling. I am trying to convince myself it is a good sign that i am getting worse. Other wise i would just go nuts.

Do you ever just over think your swelling? | Arthritis Information