OT - do you spend time counting your blessings? | Arthritis Information

 

I used to be a glass half-full type, always paranoid, always imagining worst-case scenarios.  Well, that was before the husband had a massive heart attack (while we had an infant at home and another one due in less than 2 months) and the doctors didn't expect him to live.  And my mother, father, and stepmother all battled serious health issues later that same year - colon cancer (mom), major back surgery w/complications and a month in the hospital (dad) and round 3 of ovarian cancer (stepmom).  I worried myself into a nervous breakdown.  Two years later, the RA crap started.

Since then, I've found that it does absolutely no good to piss and moan and feel sorry for myself, or to constantly worry that everyone around me is going to drop dead, or that I will lose my job, or I will be the victim of another violent crime (I was attacked several years ago and the bastard is serving 65 years).  Instead, I focus on the positive things.  And the more I do that, the more I realize how blessed we really are.  We belong to a wonderful church, full of opportunities to help others; I have great friends whom I can lean on in times of need, and who in turn can lean on me for help.  I got involved in our community and spend lots of time getting to know the people in city hall and the school district, attend the public meetings, and work on various committees to bring about positive changes.

Most of these activities do not require much effort or stamina; you can help your community just by showing up to a city council meeting, showing your elected officials that you're paying attention to how they run your city, and then letting others know what went on at the meeting.  It may not seem like much, but you can't just sit back and trust that the local newspaper is going to do the reporting.  I have a talent for beating computers into submission, so I am called upon when we have computer problems at our church or our school.  My schedule does not allow me to work in our parish food pantry, soup kitchen or homeless shelter, but I do work at the parish Bingo game every Wednesday, which brings in a large part of our budget to run those ministries.

When I first started getting more involved, I was still having quite a bit of pain from the RA, but I decided that I was not going to become a hermit.  And I found that after I started getting more involved, I no longer had time to lounge around and feel sorry for myself.  I had a new sense of purpose, a whole mess of friends, and a new outlook on life.

My husband is a bit of a homebody, so he is home with the kids when I have evening meetings to attend.  The boys do help at the Bingo game, and they like the fact that they are helping to raise money for their school and church.  My husband's "volunteer" work is mainly holding the fort down when I have other commitments in the evening.  He's more of a homebody, and after a long day at work he prefers to hang out at home.  Without his help, I would not be able to do as many of the activities as I do.  I still have to cook the dinner each night though... otherwise they would order pizza every night of the week!! I count my blessings every single morning.  Besides RA/PsA/OA I have a wonderful family and friends.  I take the good along with the bad.  The good in my life makes it easier to deal with the times of pain.  I've always preached that if you suffer from a chronic illness that you need to keep your family and your friends close to you.  They will always help you through the roughest of times.

Everyday, since my youngest daughter was diagnosed with cancer when she was 16....She's healthy, happy and the light of my life :)    She and her sisters have taught me there is no greater joy than to appreciate the little things in life.  We all try and live everyday to its fullest.  You can never know what tomorrow will bring................On a whole I think I am but sometimes I still let worries get to me. I do feel good when I help people and try to do that as often as possible. I do thank God everyday for all the blessings he bestows upon me. I do believe positive thinking is very important in all situations. Right now in my life I don't have time to volunteer but I know one day I will. I want to work with abused children. We have an organization that houses them until foster families can take them in and I so want to work there.I have so much to be grateful for, I stop daily and wonder how I have been so blessed.  Every moment of my life I have been loved, and have loved others.  I have an incredible family, that is close and loving, my kids all love each other and us dearly, and are always there for each other.  My daughter's fiance is a wonderful guy, who adores my daughter, as she does him.

This is a great thread that reminds us we need to focus on the good in our lives, and we all have it if we just look.  My husband and I often remark on how blessed we are and we both do volunteer work to try and give something back.  Just as exercise is so important for our well-being, learning to focus on other people and things, instead of ourselves and our aches and pains, is equally important and will do so much to improve our own lives.  It took me a while to get to this point, but I realize that attitude is one of the major keys for optimal health, both physical and mental. 

We are blessed in our family.   Just blessed.  I have the most supportive husband and the most incredible daughter.  Truly, they are gifts from God.  We try to give back everyday - from teaching our daughter to recycle, to volunteering at church, to being involved in politics.  Jasmine, I probably don't spend enough time counting my blessings but like you know that it's time spent in futility to worry. I read somewhere that people think when they worry about a situation, the bigger the situation the more they think they should worry, as if it's lending credence to the situation. Some actually think that worrying will help in some way. For myself, the more time spent worrying, the less time actually coming up with a solution. If I'm in worry mode it's like that's all I can do at that particular time. I try not to do it, old habits die hard though.I count my blessings. I keep a gratitude journal.. I'm a worrier, always have been - I think it's from childhood issues and never quite believing that good things will last, so that even when things were going well, I'd be looking ahead to what could mess it up.  Two things happened and while it didn't stop me completely from worrying, it has lessened it and made me realize you can't always control what will happen.   One was my nephew who fought cancer for 2 years and died at age 5,  the other was being diagnosed with RA.   You don't always get to pick how your life will turn out and life isn't always fair, and you can choose to either give in or roll with the punches.   Easier said than done and it's not always easy to look on the bright side, but sure makes life more pleasant when you can.  I count my blessings everyday and am grateful
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