I have been very depressed | Arthritis Information

In alot of pain and so tired.Just increased prozac to 80mg. a day.There has been days where I just wanted to die.If it was just me I would just waste away.But I have my children to take care of.I hate feeling this way.

Lovie

Hi Sheila,

I'm sorry you feel so bad Sheila. I know the feeling.

I have those days too. I sometimes wish I could have the nerve to do it. But then it would make my family suffer. And they are going thru enough with me.

You are all so brave to share your feelings about this. It is very easy to get down when you are suffering with chronic pain, but like you have all said, you would be sorely missed by many around you. I hope that you all are able to find comfort and support in the words of others on this board. Hang in there and keep reminding yourselves that the light at the end of the tunnel may be just out of sight, but it's there.hi sheryl,
i too suffer from depression when i was told that i have osteoarthritis in my hip. the feee.ling is so weird, before i was told about the news, i was walking -limping. after when i was told about the news, all of the sudden, my body reacted sooo fast, and now, i am walkinh slowly with muscle spasm, and relying on a walking stick.

i'm 28 and i know that i will miss alot of things. and i don;t know what will happen in he future.

but when i watch the tv ads and read the news about third world countries, where kids under the age of 5 dying or have degenerative diseases each day due to lack of nourishment or living in poverty - i should be thankful to god, how fortunate i am right now to be sheltered, and have access to medication to relive the pain.

there are alot of people who are more sever and unfortunate than us.

being sick i feel more enlighten than ever - i didn't realise until now, how horrible i was in the past - so i am using this time to take care of myself, and the people i love the most - mostly my mother who is 60 and have to cook for me.

easily said - it's weird - maybe it's really to do with the weather - when the weather is gloomy and dark, with the sound of the wind blowing, you tend to feel down. but when the sky is shinning brightly, and warm, and the trees and grass looks greener - you tend to be happy.

it's spring here in australia, so, i went out of the backyard and took some photos of my japanese maple tree. they are blooming well with bright green foliage, and the sky is blue. the reason why i took photos of the sky is to remind myself that whenever i feel down again, there are lots of things in this world i should be looking forward to....

by the way, i am easing pain by taking warm/hot showers twice a day, and somedays, incorporate a bath to exercise my leg. it really helps to ease the pain, and very relaxing.

i also uses creams and oils to make my joints smoothier.... and just recently brought this electrical massarger that looks like a supermarket scanner to massage my neck/back, and leg. it cost me feels good, but too heavy to hold it for too long.

i try to drink plenty of hot/water water, and avoid cold food/drinks.

i dont know why, but i feel warm fluids warms my body up - cold things depresses me.
jimmyjasshonda,

Your post was sooo inspiring! Yes, sometimes we tend to feel sorry for ourselves, especially with all the pain we go through. Sometimes when I am having a big flare-up, I just want to curl up and die. But then it passes and I try to move on. When I was first diagnosed and the meds did not kick in yet, I know I went through a big depression. My RA doctor was not helpful either. I had wanted to join a arthritis message board back then (almost 3 years ago)but he said, it would make me more depressed. I totally do not agree with him at all!!! I mean who would understand us better than someone who has what we have? I wouldn't wish RA on my worst enemy!
I find these threads very helpful because we really are all in the same boat.
Yes, I find that warm drinks are better than cold but unfortunately, I love cold drinks too.
Btw, is your name Jimmy? That was my dad's name. Just wondering.
Anyway, nice talking to you!Sheila1366,

Hi, I know what you are going through. I feel like dying some days too. This was when I was first diagnosed. When I would have a bad flare-up, I couldn't move. It was all so perplexing for me. I would go into a deep depression and not want to do a thing. Now, when I have a bad flare-up, I just say to myself, "this will pass" and I make sure I get a lot of rest.
We all know how you feel so, please be patient and know that we all have a purpose in life, for you, it is your children. I do hope you are feeling better. Take care of yourself and have a great Thanksgiving!

Shelia,

It is very common to have a lot of depression with a chronic illness. I know that most of us have it at varying degrees. Some days it is worse than others for me. I just try to hang in there and think of at least one good thing. When I find the times the most difficult I just give it to God. Just give it to him. There are better days ahead.

Lesle

Hi Sheliea,

Have lot of days with depression want give up curl up and die cuss of pain and stress ect.Yet have keep going people love me people i love,my pets go nuts with out me here also i know that.

Tonite in lot of pain frustraiting going try lie down get some rest if i can here.Sure hope your day get better.I didnt like prozac got way from it.Hang in there hope you have better days there.

from shadow77

nite all

hi dear

im like u suffering and thinking to resist for my kids

i know is terrible i dont sleep and eat since i got the dx i lost 5 kg in 2 weeks and i think i lose more. such bad luck before xmas and graduation thinking to start a 9 life and a 9 job. damn is so infair

if u have email or msn we can chat if u like

kind regards

Iris

[QUOTE=Lovie]
Hate to hear you so upset Sheila. Hope today finds you better.

Lovie
[/QUOTE]

Both of you - come join us on www.rafriends.com We've got all sorts of emotions running rampant there and an excellent support group. Most of the people have RA, though some do not.

Please register. I promise you won't be alone.

Lee12345

You might try posting in the rheumatoid thread on this board. It gets very busy and lots of support.

I believe that if there is an identifiable reason for feeling depressed it is better to try and deal with the reason first rather than take an anti-depressant but of course this is often easier said than done. The only time I sufferred from a long period of depression I lay in bed for 2 weeks and slept most of the 2 weeks. I knew what was depressing me and gradually dealt with the situation that at the time looked overwhelmingly difficult. In your case the pain and the difficulty in coping with a serious and debilitating illness is the reason.

Better pain relief would enable you to live more normally which could in turn lighten your depression. Of course we are all different and my situation is probably a lot easier to deal with than yours. As we age and our bodies deteriorate and we get illnesses that stop us from living normally it is understandable that we feel down but at least your spirit which is who you really are (and who your kids love) doesn't have arthritis!

I belong to another forum to do with near death experiences (I haven't had one but have always been interested in spiritual things) and I am absolutely certain there is something better to come when we are finished with our relatively brief existence here on earth. It is comforting to know this and realise that we are essentially a spirit living temporarily in our body. The spirit is what we need to cherish most. In case you are interested the site can be found at:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/nde/messages

It could give you comfort when you realise that our suffering is only temporary and there is much better to come (it is of course hard to believe this and remember this when we are suffering here).

If you are in a lot of pain the best anti-depressant you could have would be getting adequate daily pain relief lasting all day because then you would be able to do things and it would make you feel better. If the doctor won’t treat the pain properly be more insistent and if he still won’t treat it properly consider finding one that will but keep in mind that pain relieving drugs and Prozac may have unwanted and serious side effects so if you saw a different doctor it would be essential to let him know you were taking Prozac.

dragon38760.2510648148i know how much depression affect your daily work.. hope you can get over it... been through so much depression but my friends helped me out, hope you would be better.... best wishes...

I suffer from depression and take wellbutrin xl 300mg. This has completely cured/managed the suicidal severity/hopelessness but anger,sadness, fatigue and mood swings still exist. I live in Michigan and these symptoms just don't exist in the summer. I really need to move to Florida for mine and my son's health. I have found that the tanning bed and vitamin D help the other symptoms. I know the tanning bed is not a great thing to do but it really helps me.

Teech738795.7621412037Zoloft - it has changed my life. Seems to be the right chemical for my brain so I can be myself again. I do not take any other meds, and doing fine.

This is what I do , watch a really funny movie with someone who isn’t feeling bad ,rent Young Frankenstein, Blazing Saddles or what ever and laugh till you feel better . your friend will laugh and before long you will too

try to do things that will help improve your mood. when i get bouts of depression i will try to change my mind and do the thing that i like most. like, listen to my kind of music or read or even go out shopping. i meet up with friends. i try not to stay alone, it gets worse for me if i feel lonely. i was on prozac too, very minimal dose, but i have taken resolution to reduce it, not to grow dependent on it now. i am slowing making my way uphill.it is not easy but i am not giving up. Sheliea my heart and prayers go out to you because I know exactly how you feel. I myself wonder if I would be here today if it were not for my daughter. First it was for my family but when times got almost to much to bare I wanted my pain and depression to end. I have my brother Leo to thank for bringing back from a dark place but for how long? What do I have to offer when I can't work because of my sickness, and do nothing but resent being here because of all this pain. My family is doing so well and they all have exciting lives to live, a purpose for being here. I have nothing to look forward to but a life of pain and most times I don't think I will be able to handle that. I tried Zoloft before and it did not help me one bit. I don't take anything for depression now but I am going to look into it. My emotions are like a roller coaster.

By all means let your doctor know that the Prozac is not working, that is a side affect of the Prozac to all of a sudden feel like dying. Need to tell the doctor that.

I suffer mental illness and know what depression is like, there are plenty of other medications to try. Sometimes combinding medications help. Keep your head up.

Hi, I'm a newbie here, and I also suffer with depression,
anxiety and stress, so I know what it's like.

If anyone would like me to enter you in my Prayer Request forum on my site, I will gladly do that.

May you recieve the strength you need to carry you through.

I use to be on Prozac and know from past experience that that drug has different affects person to person, sometimes it can and has caused people to think about killing themself. I would recommend that you immediately tell your doctor so they can move you off this medication and on to something else.

Personally I take Zoloft, Geodone, Clonzepam, and Concerta. In the past I have taken Lithium, Amyatriptiline, Rispuderal, Cymbolta with mixed results. It is all trial and error on getting the right medication then finding the right dose.

I am Bipolar I (manic/depression), Borderline Personality, Obsessive / Compulsive Disorder, Attention Deficit Disorder, and Post Tramatic Stress Disorder. I have not always went with the medication. When I get depressed that is usually when I get back on the medication, other then that I am trying to get the manic side back because it is like a high like drug users always looking for that high. But I take my chances going off the medication that I hit depression and not manic.

I have been so sad in my life that I have actually cut my writs, not because I wanted to die, but more because I wanted to be saved. I was Liable (cry at the drop of a dime) and profoundly projected my saddness on others. Led to my divorce when my ex was starting to think about taking his life too. He decided it was me and had to get away. The divorce lawyer was so shaken by my depression, that he didn't charge me any thing but court costs.

For months I was unsettling many people around me, felt like a recking ball. 6 months of utter sadness, it took 6 months trying different drugs and doses before I could stop crying day to day. Sometimes it seems like an eternity. And the pain does not go away, it is just that they finally found something that took my anxiety down.

I MADE IT - here I am 2 years after that terrible period and I can get by now, I can step back and distance myself from unhappy thoughts. I found a really nice guy, that I know my Grandfather would of liked, his kind of people. Humble and honest, and that has pulled me back to reality.I can move forward again, even though I have dark thoughts on past events. Just they are not in the forefront any longer. Like a weight taken off my shoulders.

Take care,

[QUOTE=Sheila1366]In alot of pain and so tired.Just increased prozac to 80mg. a day.There has been days where I just wanted to die.If it was just me I would just waste away.But I have my children to take care of.I hate feeling this way.

Ducky says: http://www.quackwatch.org/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/cranial.ht ml

Lynk38992.7892824074

Look into CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) treatments for depression and anxiety. Mental health symptoms are common with chronic illness...untreated they can make the symptoms of the illness worse, decrease quality of life and increase mortality. If you can't afford therapy, look for local universities (particularly large state schools) where they may have graduate programs where students will exchange "free" therapy (under guidance of a psychologist) in exchange for the training opportunity. Larger hospitals may also offer "heath psychology" options.

I actually did some of this (I'm a psychology prof) with some elderly gents with chronic obstructive lung disease, and treating the depression and anxiety made considerable differences in many of their lives including relief of some symptomology. Mental health treatment doesn't cure the underlying medical disease of course, but can help maximize functioning.

3 common elements of treatment for depression though are:

1.) Hypothesis testing. Depressed/anxious people often times form hypotheses about the world that they assume to be true without testing them. "Everyone hates me" or "there is nothing good in my life" would be common examples. Test them against reality...a single disconfirmatory incidence is enough to require revision of the hypothesis.

2.) Do fun things even if you don't feel like it. One common symptom of depression is "anhedonia" or the feeling that nothing is fun. Oftentimes once depressed people start engaging in an activity they find themselves enjoying it even though they thought they would not. Remember what hobbies you may have indulged in in the past and return to them on a regular schedule...do the activites as planned in the schedule whether you feel like it in the moment or not.

3.) Increase activity level. Medical patients in particular often restrict physical activities due to illness. Consult with your doctor and see what physical activities are right for you, and prepare a regular schedule when you can do these activities...again whether you feel like it or not (mentally speaking that is...obviously if you have medical symptoms that preclude an activity, check with your doctor first).

Good luck...depression is a common secondary problem with medical illness, but don't have to be inevitable. Medication can be part of the solution, but focus on reasonable and attainable behavior change as well.