Emotional Yesterday | Arthritis Information

So... yesterday I was emotional and grouchy.

I accussed my hubby of calling me a drug addict. Because... he said something to the effect that I did not need my pain meds and muscle relaxers and that I just wanted them.

I do not think he is right. I think he has no idea what pains I have. I started to cry and told him if he felt that way... then please do not open my meds bottles for me.

I lay here in pain some days, because I do not want to take my pain meds and muscle relaxers. I rather be in pain then have to take them. I wait until he gets home to take them, because ... 1) he should not have to put up with me being in pain because I choose not to take them and 2) Sometimes I can't open the bottles.

But yesterday was more like.... see you were getting better, and now you are going back to the way you were.

So... yesterday I sat on my bed crying and nothing thinking of much of anything. Just that my right leg hurt and it was all nice and swelled. I even thought about getting it drained if it was still swelled big when I went to my RD appt on the 17th.

Then my hubby felt bad for me, because I could not raise my right leg enough to put my pants on and it made me cry even more. He helped me put my pants on and even offered to button them for me. But I struggled buttoning them, and done it myself.

It is kinda weird how he thinks I do not need pain meds and muscle relaxers, but he thinks I need his help to get dressed.

I mean of course, he might have been joking around about me and my pain management meds, he does it all the time. But for some reason... it made me sad by his joking comments. I guess because I might have felt guilty in needing to take them, even after all the time I use to just "deal with it" or "ride it out".

Or it means that my pain is getting worse and more unbearable. I have been having to take at least 2 doses of my pain meds for my back hurting all the time. Those are just the days that I cannot take the pain anymore or I get pain in my ribs.

[QUOTE=joonie]

Maybe they are talking about my hands and arms?

Well... first joints to go bad on me is my knees and hips, and then my hands/fingers and arms join in.

But really... my back is what tells me when the Remicade has worn off. Because I hear that fluid "Swishing" sound in my neck and my back continually hurts, until I get my hubby to "pop" it. Which is light pressure on my spine that he does with his hands pressing down.

So... how is it that so many people see my problem in so many different degrees of "doing well". My mom knows I am not doing well... and I did not even tell her. She said it was all told by my face. How nice is that?

I hope today is a better day for you Joonie.

[QUOTE=joonie] Oh today is much better. I can bend my knee a little today and it kinda straightens out now. I am up walking around. My leg just feels sore and is a bit swelled still. I have been up and out of bed more times today than I have in the last 2 days. And actually feel like going somewhere because I think my knee can take it.

But I guess I am saving up for saturday LOL! Hubby never called me at home to tell what the answer to my txt message was. He probably does not want to go see the new Friday the 13th movie. He's a scaredy-kat!

Thanks everyone for your replies. I was just reflecting back on yesterday. Mostly because I did not do much of anything yesterday soo... a couple of things stood out and was bothering me.

I hope yall are having a good day.

Hi Joonie,

I'm sorry I didn't see your post earlier or I would have posted something. I'm really glad to hear you are having a better day. I too have my days when I just feel "beat up" and I don't think those around me really know what it's like. Have a good day...Hiking_gal

edited from "yesterday to earlier" HG

hiking_gal2009-02-13 12:16:35Joonie - Sorry you had a bad day yesterday, hope things are better today, is your Remicade on the 17th too? I had mine yesterday, a week early.

The only nurse who can find a vein, was going on vacation and low and behold I accidentally called in time to change my regularily scheduled appointment. She found the vein, I got groceries afterwards, I was batting a million.

But when I got home I fell in the driveway trying to smooth out where the plow guy had left a berm in front of the door. Talk about a crappy ending to what had appeared to be a great day. I had to crawl back to the car on my elbows and knees, my four worst joints, I have to have something to push myself up on, thank goodness the door on the car was still open. I'm only telling you this because I bet we were crying at the same time.

Anyway, DH gets home about 30 minutes after I dragged myself inside, my butt was soaking wet from sitting in the snow, I was too fried to change them, at least DH carried in the rest of the groceries then he went to town for a meeting, the channel that 'Survivor' AND the channel that 'ER' come on are off the air and he wants to get frisky? when he finally gets home again. I do not ever want to see another day like yesterday again, but that's life. I think crawling in the snow on my knees, may have helped them. JK Hope things are looking up. Hugs hugs hugs your way! Joonie- sorry I am a late poster too. I had a lot going on today at work and after.
Hope you are in a better mindset and that your body is treating you right. I know the feeling of thinking you are not understood. Whether it is real or imagined doesn't make a difference. At the time it makes you feel like crap. Hope your husband really understands your needs and takes care of his possum. LOL
for you Joonie sweetie and I hope you are even better than your last post by now.

I only ever had my knees swollen and unable to bend them once, and that was the big flare that got me Dx'd. I pray I NEVER get there again and I can so understand how that feels. Never had that much pain in my life.

Thinking of ya!!

Lyn xxx

thanks for the understanding everyone. It really helps.

Joonie,

I'm glad things are better and I hope they continue to improve. The drugs are there to help so take them when you need them and tell your hubby to kiss you boo-booos.

take care, girlie