When a board goes bad | Arthritis Information

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I have been reading the board for quite a long time now, posted just a few times ,  does anyone see the same as I do?

There used to be a variety of members on here, discussing various topics. Sometimes it took a while to find a post as they moved so quickly, now you can find a post easily . What happened to all the old members, the ones who gave great advice, had the knowledge from their own experiences, not just something that is just copied and pasted from the net.
The fun posts, the informative posts, the "debating" posts.
The board has been reduced to a few members that ran others out of here and some new ones trying to find their feet. Its such a shame that human kindness did not lend itself to this board .
I'm a new hand at this game Sandra, only been playing the game for 2 and a bit years, but as you, I have noticed a sh*t.
The seas have been a little on the rough side lately, but hopefully calmer weather is around the corner.
I wish for smoother sailing in the not to distant future.

Sandra, the forum has it's ebbs and wanes.  It will be fine for months and then any number of things can set it off.  Sometimes it's something as simple as asking for clarification, other times it's rudeness.  You never know how people will respond.  People come and go.  This has been going on for a very long time and will continue.  It's not a moderated board and this is the type of forum that trolls and bullies are attracted to.  
 
People sift through the crap and look for the nuggets of wisdom and information and ignore everything else or they move on to a moderated forum.  I belong to several RA forums and I choose to sift through this one for the information that I find pertinent.  I happen to find the info that's "copied from the net" useful.  Not everyone has the ability or the time to search the web for information related to RA and what may not be useful to us, is useful to someone else. 
 
People come and go.  For the most part people return after a period of time, maybe not with the same name but they return.  I've been on the forum for about 4 years and lurked for some time before joining and I've seen them come and go. 
 
Also, there's quite an active PM among the people that disappear and with other members of the forum.  They've only disappeared from the surface of the forum.  Lindy 
Sandra...if you are unhappy with the tone of the board then help us change it.  Post an interesting topic.  Respond to questions that newcomers ask.  Participate.  [QUOTE=buckeye]Sandra...if you are unhappy with the tone of the board then help us change it.  Post an interesting topic.  Respond to questions that newcomers ask.  Participate.  [/QUOTE]
 
People are still around but often just pop in for a bit and then go find something else to spend their time on. There are alot of folks that don't care to participate in the name calling and the constant nastiness that goes around in here at times.....but the ones you miss always come back. Their more than likely here but just remain quiet because they don't have anything to contribute to that mess.
 
I've been a member here for years and always remain involved. The crap comes and goes but the reason you came to enjoy this site to begin with always remain. The junk comes and goes but the goodness remains.
 
Find other resources to spend the majority of your computer time. That's what the majoirty of the people you're missing are doing. Many folks don't have enough time to waist so they spend their time wisely.
 
AND; I too appreciate the copy and paste info that has been researched by other members. Yes; I could do general searches on my own.....but I always find the articles or information posted by our members to be of interest. This site doesn't really have current topics of interest posted by the owners so it's important to our members; especially newbies that we all work together to post things that we feel other's might find useful. I'm certainly not interested in information that anyone formulates on their own. No one here is qualified to do that. What good is that? Opinions are fine but often these copy and paste posts are taken directly from medical websites and it's information we all need to know.

The board goes through cycles.  It can be very frustrating, but most of the same people are still around.  There are still lots of good threads-you just might need to dig a bit more.

I encourage any newbies who read this thread to stick around.  I have received great support from this board.  RA and all its cousins are very confusing diseases.  Finding a community where you can get support is essential.  I belong to two different boards.  They are very different "personality" wise, but they make me realize that I am not crazy. 
 
I just try not to get involved in threads that contain personal attacks.  I tend to take things very personally-so I don't even go there.  But, there are tons of people here who may have been down the road you are just begining to travel.
[QUOTE=Sandra]I have been reading the board for quite a long time now, posted just a few times ,  does anyone see the same as I do?
There used to be a variety of members on here, discussing various topics. Sometimes it took a while to find a post as they moved so quickly, now you can find a post easily . What happened to all the old members, the ones who gave great advice, had the knowledge from their own experiences, not just something that is just copied and pasted from the net.
The fun posts, the informative posts, the "debating" posts.
The board has been reduced to a few members that ran others out of here and some new ones trying to find their feet. Its such a shame that human kindness did not lend itself to this board .
[/QUOTE]
 
Well, I have to admit, this post hurt my feeling....I've been a member of this board for over two years and I lurked before that.  I try and post articles that I find interesting, articles that I think might be helpful.....
I didn't realize that copying and pasting from medical journals and reliable medical websites was making this board go bad.  I'm more than willing to discuss my "real life" experiences and I thought I'd been very upfront about my 9 year battle with RA. I always assumed that people would prefer to take medical advice from their RD's, not a message board....Apparently I was wrong.
 
I'm stopping now, before I say something that might be considered nasty.  It's a shame that you couldn't do that Sandra!
Lynn; Honey, we rely on you to search out topics that you know we'll find useful. I think you can see from other comments here that there is no reason for you to stop posting anything.
 
You are a source of information for us. We apprecite what you post and I ask you to please not take offense to what this original poster wrote in referrence to copy and paste post. She is only speaking for herself not for the rest of us.

Lynn!  That is ONE persons opinion..... certainly not near the majority who appreciate your posts and helpful articles....

keep up the great work.......  Lynn I don't think Sandra necessarily meant that the way it came out.  I think she is just trying to say she appreciates the discussions from members about their own real life experiences, and the opportunity to get personal connections with those who understand.  Forgive me if I am wrong Sandra. 
 
Lynn I definitely appreciate your research and articles, and I also know if there was something I needed to learn more about, I could ask you to help me find info and you would drop everything and do it to help.  That's just the kind of girl you are!
 
I think Sandra makes some very good points here and applaud her for saying what she has.  The climate here right now makes it very difficult to stick your neck out and say anything, for fear you'll bring back a bloody stub.  The tension has risen and everyone is looking for hidden meanings or jabs in what folks say.  I hope it will calm down and the game of one upsmanship will end. 
 
I agree with what some of the others have said about the ebb and flow of the board, but I do feel things have changed a lot in recent months.  Although we have weathered other storms, the wounds and scars are cumulative and keep snowballing, getting bigger and uglier.  People remember the feelings they felt, even if they don't remember the exact words that were used, and crudges are made and held onto.  And then there's always someone who will pull up the old crap to stir things up.
 
Ultimately I have decided that all I can do is take personal responsibility for what I say and do here.  I can't control anyone else's behavior.  I have learned many lessons here, and gained a lot of knowledge and valuable info.  I have also made personal connections I treasure.  I have also learned that being RIGHT and proving it to everyone is just not worth it.  All the dead horses here have been beaten to a mushy pulp.  We need to let stuff go and rebuild.
 
 
 
Sandra.. I have been on many boards, and have moderated  also, and EVERY board in the net has these ebbs and flows of  usefulness.
 
A fully moderated board will get rid of the nasties, but it also prevents a free flowing exchange..
 
I agree with the poster who said  you can help the board become good by posting and getting involved..  and I too do not agree with your assessment that the cut and paste articles ( actually only links for the most part) are in any way a negative thing.
 
Lynn has helped me enormously in gaining  excellent knowledge about these diseases we share. I wouldnt even know where to begine to do the research she does.
 
 
LYNN!!!! Do NOT stop your posting of the links. I click on every one of them.. Now many I only read the first couple of paragraphs, but others I read and save.
 
 
Lynn: I am in total agreement with Lovie, rocckyd and Hillhoney.
          I, too, click on everyone of your posts and have saved many of them.
          * Gentle Hugs *
[QUOTE=Sandra]I have been reading the board for quite a long time now, posted just a few times , [/QUOTE]

Sandra, just for the record, is the Sandra mentioned in the following quote you?

[QUOTE=Mrs Pincushion] There was a member on here and I will tell you her name, Sandra, she has been in contact and she used to work for the USA government, her husband has RA but she left as she found the board to be slightly unreal. She pm's now and then and knows some people in high places who she is going to ask what the law is with  all of this, maybe she can do something maybe she cant but there are some very sadistical  folk on here, who really never post about their RA or help others, they only pop up when trouble is brewing.[/QUOTE]

http://arthritisinsight.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=22265&PID=248933#248933
Why try and analyze a MESSAGE BOARD???  Yes there are a few crazies that post rediculous things. For goodness sakes. Ignore and move on.

I'm just glad I found this board so I know there are people out there who understand.......I just came in last week and I see some of that awful stuff people are saying but then I also see some lovely conversations and I will just avoid those mean spiritied people.

I like the article links too! 

 

Sandra, I can not tell you how much the articles Lynn has posted, as well as articles posted by others, has educated me.  Perhaps if you read them, you may find them useful as well.  I have personally asked Lynn to help me find something and she spent hours doing so!  What a friend! 

I was telling another member yesterday how lucky I feel to have found this place and what wonderful support there is here!  If you do not feel that, perhaps is is because you are not participating.  I was in a very poor place indeed when I joined AI.  I was in pain and leery and wary and afraid to tell my story.  When I did open up, I was surprised and grateful for the response!  I not only got wonderful support and understanding, I also found excellent information on my disease, related disease, medications, side effects....  I soon found if I gave support back, it was even more rewarded.  The more you give, the more you get. 

As for the post that bother you, well, it is like sorting beans prior to cooking... You dump the bag on the table, flick out the rocks and bad beans... add a little of this and a little of that... and soon you have a nicely seasoned pot of tasty beans! Okay, I'm sorry for my  rant earlier in this thread   I get grumpy and possibly a little touchy when my sleep is interrupted............
 
 
 
 
is that the pollen that has my nose so stuffed I can barely swallow without feeling as though I am suffocating??????  *whew*  I thought I was getting a cold! Take  to you Lynn, Babs and Snow.  I would willingly send you some of the sunshine from here were I in possession of a tiny bit of fairy magic and I will take some of that rain, please!   Allergies You Say! The pressure I'm feeling is like nothing I've ever felt before (at least that I can remember)! Sneezing doesn't relieve the pressure and breathing through my mouth makes my throat dry and then the coughing jags begin. CAN'T TOUCH MY FACE BECAUSE IT'S TENDER TO THE TOUCH! Also, don't dare bend over for anything to quickly or I become light-headed.

This is one time "Calgon Take Me Away Isn't Going To Do It."

But then this, too, will pass.  *Gentle Hugs*
[QUOTE=waddie]Take  to you Lynn, Babs and Snow.  I would willingly send you some of the sunshine from here were I in possession of a tiny bit of fairy magic and I will take some of that rain, please!   [/QUOTE]

Bring on the heat!  It is 64 degrees in my house today... I had to turn on the heat lest the menfolk freeze to death again tonight!  There was a bunch of whining and complaining about the inhuman conditions this morning when they woke up "freezing to death."[/QUOTE]
 
EXACTLY, WW!!!  you have described me PERFECTLY!
 
I hope it all goes away................ soon!!
[QUOTE=watchingwolf]Allergies You Say! The pressure I'm feeling is like nothing I've ever felt before (at least that I can remember)! Sneezing doesn't relieve the pressure and breathing through my mouth makes my throat dry and then the coughing jags begin. CAN'T TOUCH MY FACE BECAUSE IT'S TENDER TO THE TOUCH! Also, don't dare bend over for anything to quickly or I become light-headed.

This is one time "Calgon Take Me Away Isn't Going To Do It."

But then this, too, will pass.  *Gentle Hugs*
[/QUOTE]

Sounds like a sinus infection.  Call your doc. [QUOTE=babs10]

Jas..is that based on the facial pain?  cause i dont' have that...  

[/QUOTE]

Yep, facial pain, sensitive to touch - sinus infections are notorious for this.
ok.. gotcha...
*whew*
 
I want to do my shot tonight......  [QUOTE=SnowOwl]Jas, how's your family?  How're you holding up?[/QUOTE]

Day by day.  I'm home today with a bit of a cold.  Hopefully it will be cleared by tomorrow so I can go back over to dad's.
Wow.  This thread changed courses!!  To all of you who are suffering with allergies, sinus infections, I feel for ya.  I don't have seasonal allergies, but I spent many o' night listening to my little sister's snotty nose breathing when we shared a bedroom.  I used to pelt her with stuffed animals in desparate attempt to wake her up long enough to blow her nose.   I wonder if it's karma that my husband is now such a crazy loud snorer.
 
Anyway, I hope it'll go away soon.
 
Jas~ this stuff all happened with your fam right before I left for NC and I'm afraid I don't know the out come.  I hope your da and your husbands gramma (?) are recovering well.  When you get the chance, please give me an update, k?
[QUOTE=Linncn]Wow.  This thread changed courses!!  To all of you who are suffering with allergies, sinus infections, I feel for ya.  I don't have seasonal allergies, but I spent many o' night listening to my little sister's snotty nose breathing when we shared a bedroom.  I used to pelt her with stuffed animals in desparate attempt to wake her up long enough to blow her nose.   I wonder if it's karma that my husband is now such a crazy loud snorer. to you Lynn, Babs and Snow.  I would willingly send you some of the sunshine from here were I in possession of a tiny bit of fairy magic and I will take some of that rain, please!   [/QUOTE]
 
We must be in the same general region Waddie as our temp here today is 85 d plus.  I am a woose when it comes to hot weather and the pills I take make everything ten times worse.  I will gladly package up this heat and send it to you all.
The pollen does not bother me too much but poor dh is suffering terribly.
 
So sorry about your family problems Jasmine.  Hope things get better soon. 
TeedOff2009-05-28 15:13:06This board is not dead, bad, evil, or mean spirited.
 
I may not have been participating much in the last year, but that does not negate the support, friendship, and empathy I found here.
[QUOTE=TeedOff][QUOTE=waddie]
 
If they haven't gotten you yet and tried to publicly humiliate you or attack you or bash the sh*t out of you, your opinions or the meds you take...BE WARNED, it will happen, it's only a matter of time.
 
This board would improve by 200% if they left and NEVER returned.  When they aren't posting, the board is quiet, if you can't see that then YOU ARE BLIND!!!

Well it needs to be said that I wont be going anywhere Lisa0nline....so your continuing to post as you do, does nothing but upset everyone else on this forum. Not to mention any poor newbie venturing in.

If in fact you ARE a regular poster here then is it not time to take a step back and look at the disharmony you are causing amongst those you are not targeting?? If you truly care about these forums then you would desist. If you wish to carry on accusing me of whatever pops into your head, please feel free to do so, but keep it to PM's.
 
I will not be addressing you again on the forums.
 
Lyn
[QUOTE=LyndeeNZ]

Well it needs to be said that I wont be going anywhere Lisa0nline....so your continuing to post as you do, does nothing but upset everyone else on this forum. Not to mention any poor newbie venturing in.

If in fact you ARE a regular poster here then is it not time to take a step back and look at the disharmony you are causing amongst those you are not targeting?? If you truly care about these forums then you would desist. If you wish to carry on accusing me of whatever pops into your head, please feel free to do so, but keep it to PM's.
 
I will not be addressing you again on the forums.
 
Lyn
[/QUOTE]
 
Oh thank you GOD!!!  She isn't going to "address me" anymore.
 
I don't need you Lyndee or anyone else to tell me "desist".  I'll post about you and the others and your bullsh*t whenever I feel like it...and keep it up babe because I'm not even through with you yet.
Jas, I'm thinking of you and your family.  The last thing any of you needed was a 24 virus, hope all of you recover soon.  Take care of yourself.  Lindy [QUOTE=LinB]Jas, I'm thinking of you and your family.  The last thing any of you needed was a 24 virus, hope all of you recover soon.  Take care of yourself.  Lindy[/QUOTE]

Actually I think the virus was *just* what the dr ordered!  I slept quite a bit and lounged around all day yesterday, never even changing out of my PJs.  Feel much better this morning - still have lingering congestion and a bit of a sore throat (from the post-nasal drip) but otherwise feel pretty decent.
Jas, I actually was going to write that but I didn't want you to think I was nuts for wishing a 24 hr. bug on you!!!!!! L"Good Morning"? Slept most of the night in my cozy recliner because my face didn't like lying on the pillow. I'm not a back sleeper but did try it only to have the post nasal drip thing become an issue.
     Although I don't have a headache the pressure behind my ears has my head feeling like Charlie Brown's Giant Pumpkin! Still can't blow my nose though.
     Yes, I finally have relented and made an appt. for early this afternoon with my gp.

Jas: You and your family are in my prayers.  *Gentle Hugs*


[QUOTE=JasmineRain] [QUOTE=LinB]Jas, I'm thinking of you and your family.  The last thing any of you needed was a 24 virus, hope all of you recover soon.  Take care of yourself.  Lindy[/QUOTE]

Actually I think the virus was *just* what the dr ordered!  I slept quite a bit and lounged around all day yesterday, never even changing out of my PJs.  Feel much better this morning - still have lingering congestion and a bit of a sore throat (from the post-nasal drip) but otherwise feel pretty decent.
[/QUOTE]

I should know better... be careful what you wish for!!  My nose won't stop running!  I thought this would be gone by now.  At least it's the thin clear snot and not the goopy sinus infection snot.Please tell me you're drinking no caffeine Coke.......please, you'll be up till sometime tomorrow night, woman.  I haven't tried to buy Sudafed but I can imagine the hoop jumping.  Stan picks up my pain meds sometimes and they've never asked if he was "Lindy".   I'm sure I'll see you on the forum tonight.  L [QUOTE=LinB]Please tell me you're drinking no caffeine Coke.......please, you'll be up till sometime tomorrow night, woman.  I haven't tried to buy Sudafed but I can imagine the hoop jumping.  Stan picks up my pain meds sometimes and they've never asked if he was "Lindy".   I'm sure I'll see you on the forum tonight.  L[/QUOTE]

I drank the Coke earlier in the day - no worries!Oh and I'm probably going to have to go to Wisconsin again this weekend - bro is back in the hospital, behaving badly.  Word on the street is that my mother might be going up there to stir up some trouble too, so someone has to referee! You need to switch to Sam's you're going to need it....! [QUOTE=LinB]You need to switch to Sam's you're going to need it....![/QUOTE]

I've been on this board for about a year.  It was pretty positive when I got here.  Seems to have changed quite a bit.  We'll see how it goes.

[QUOTE=Spelunker] [QUOTE=Sandra]I have been reading the board for quite a long time now, posted just a few times , [/QUOTE]

Sandra, just for the record, is the Sandra mentioned in the following quote you?

[QUOTE=Mrs Pincushion]
There was a member on here and I will tell you her name, Sandra, she has been in contact and she used to work for the USA government, her husband has RA but she left as she found the board to be slightly unreal. She pm's now and then and knows some people in high places who she is going to ask what the law is with  all of this, maybe she can do something maybe she cant but there are some very sadistical  folk on here, who really never post about their RA or help others, they only pop up when trouble is brewing.[/QUOTE]
Does it matter?
http://arthritisinsight.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=22265&PID=248933#248933

[/QUOTE] This board is pretty much the same as when I joined.  Some people are nice, some are nasty, mean and just want to cause trouble.  Some people are interested in debate/discussion, others are just interested in advancing an agenda........ Lynn492009-05-30 10:07:11 [QUOTE=Lynn49]This board is pretty much the same as when I joined.  Some people are nice, some are nasty, mean and just want to cause trouble.  Some people are interested in debate/discussion, others are just interested in advancing an agenda........ [/QUOTE]

That's pretty much been my observation too.
[QUOTE=JasmineRain] [QUOTE=Lynn49]This board is pretty much the same as when I joined.  Some people are nice, some are nasty, mean and just want to cause trouble.  Some people are interested in debate/discussion, others are just interested in advancing an agenda........ [/QUOTE]

That's pretty much been my observation too.
[/QUOTE]

Having read many, if not most, of the topics from 2005, I concur. In fact, with few exceptions the past couple of months have been quite temperate.
I actually joined in 2006 and when out of the country I had to re-register in 2007 and I lurked for a year or so prior to 2006.  So I've been around awhile. 
 
This forum has always had it's calm times and warlike times.  It's always been good/bad, depending on the day.  If you want to remain an active, supportive member that offers chronic illness information and guidance, then you have to wade through the posts.  Ignore many posts and post your help and support  without stepping on too many toes.  If you're not willing to participate, then you probably don't have any serious input to offer.  Lindy   
LinB-
 
How about people who violate other people's boundries.  Pip started her thread for AP people to share and then suddenly many non-AP people were there all the time.  My understanding is that a thread is started by someone with a topic and they ask people to share on that topic and respect the topic they have posted.
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda]LinB-
 
How about people who violate other people's boundries.  Pip started her thread for AP people to share and then suddenly many non-AP people were there all the time.  My understanding is that a thread is started by someone with a topic and they ask people to share on that topic and respect the topic they have posted.
[/QUOTE]
 
I was unaware that there were those kind of  "boundaries" on a public message board.  That seems a little odd to me. 
 So according to that kind of logic,  I guess that people who have never used traditional DMARDS or biologics shouldn't be allowed to comment on them............
This used to be the best forum around in my opinion.  We have lost so many great people.  It only takes a few to ruin a board.  I wish there was a way to vote and get rid of some of the "inside ugly people" because there is a lot of heart on this board and the forum has a great format.  I take my responsibility.  It was my first forum and I used it like a journal.  I learned to stick to topics and not get too personal.Lynn-
 
It really just seems like common courtesy to me.  Even on a public board people can exercise common courtesy.
[QUOTE=roxy]This used to be the best forum around in my opinion.  We have lost so many great people.  It only takes a few to ruin a board.  I wish there was a way to vote and get rid of some of the "inside ugly people" because there is a lot of heart on this board and the forum has a great format.  I take my responsibility.  It was my first forum and I used it like a journal.  I learned to stick to topics and not get too personal.[/QUOTE]
 
Yes, roxy, I agree.
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda][QUOTE=roxy]This used to be the best forum around in my opinion.  We have lost so many great people.  It only takes a few to ruin a board.  I wish there was a way to vote and get rid of some of the "inside ugly people" because there is a lot of heart on this board and the forum has a great format.  I take my responsibility.  It was my first forum and I used it like a journal.  I learned to stick to topics and not get too personal.[/QUOTE] Jas-
 
Have you ever heard of self-discipline????????????????
Jan, if your rules had been in place, I would never have known about AP because I was a "non ap".  I read all topics, whether they seem to apply to me or not.  I thought if I had some questions or something valid of interest to say or add, it was alright to do so even if a topic did not apply directly to me.  

Where are these rules???  I thought only the rules of common curtesy and decency applied to a non moderated board.

Please quit making this about AP/nonAP/everyone else.  That is simply not the case and I believe you are intelligent enough to know that.

[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda]Lynn-
 
It really just seems like common courtesy to me.  Even on a public board people can exercise common courtesy.
[/QUOTE]
 
Really Jan, perhaps you should be addressing your comments to the posters who have been telling people to F off and that accuse other posters of not really being in remission.  That, in my opinion, has a lot more to do with common courtesy...........
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda]Jas- [/QUOTE]
 
Reading and asking a question that is related to the topic is no problem,  It is long discussions totally unrelated to the topic I am talking about.
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda]It means adults have self-discipline, they restrain themselves from things that are offensive to other people.  Very simple really.[/QUOTE]
 
I think you need to be expressing that thought to all the posters here because it certainly isn't an AP verses and non AP issue!
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda][QUOTE=waddie]Jan, if your rules had been in place, I would never have known about AP because I was a "non ap".  I read all topics, whether they seem to apply to me or not.  I thought if I had some questions or something valid of interest to say or add, it was alright to do so even if a topic did not apply directly to me.  

Where are these rules???  I thought only the rules of common curtesy and decency applied to a non moderated board.

Please quit making this about AP/nonAP/everyone else.  That is simply not the case and I believe you are intelligent enough to know that.

[/QUOTE] "I actually joined in 2006 and when out of the country I had to re-register in 2007 and I lurked for a year or so prior to 2006.  So I've been around awhile. 
 
This forum has always had it's calm times and warlike times.  It's always been good/bad, depending on the day.  If you want to remain an active, supportive member that offers chronic illness information and guidance, then you have to wade through the posts.  Ignore many posts and post your help and support  without stepping on too many toes.  If you're not willing to participate, then you probably don't have any serious input to offer.  Lindy "  
 
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda]LinB-
 
How about people who violate other people's boundries.  Pip started her thread for AP people to share and then suddenly many non-AP people were there all the time.  My understanding is that a thread is started by someone with a topic and they ask people to share on that topic and respect the topic they have posted.
[/QUOTE]
 
Jan, I wasn't writing about "People's Boundaries".  My above post is concerning forum members who post without offering help, support or information and posting it in a respectful way. 
 
And speaking of respect, you can respect the poster if not the subject matter, or how it's presented.  Some people are so inaccurate and rude when posting that they don't earn respect because they haven't respected the other forum members.
 
When you see wild, inaccurate, finger-pointing and rude postings, then the so-called boundaries have been expanded by the poster.  They're leaving themselves open to questions, postings that show the other side of the topic, other people's opinions - do you not understand that this is not a moderated forum and their are no closed postings?  Most of us accept that as part of a non-moderated forum.  Some don't. 
 
There are people from all walks of life posting and some of them are quite intelligent, some are rude, some are just downright wrong and dangerous, some are laid-back, some are compassionate, some aren't.  The one consistency on the forum should be the posting of an accurate statement.  One has to be prepared to defend their statments and answer questions in an intelligent manner, but do it in a way that you don't insult the questioner.   This is called debate, not rudeness.  Debate has a whole set of rules and criteria that makes it work, even on a forum.  You can't have debate if you don't have members that are willing and able to debate in a civilized manner. 
 
I think for the most part the forum posters are a respectful lot.  You can't tell people that they're using the wrong meds and accuse them of using AP incorrectly and that their doctors are hoodlums.  Then the respect is lost, the claws come out, people start questioning the validity of the poster and their postings.  The same thing happens when a poster that posts in the middle of a debate and calls the debaters names and makes wild statements.  They lose repect.   
 
It wasn't the message, it was the messengers.  When you have an agenda it won't be accepted if you insult the group you're trying to sell it to.  So, don't talk to me about boundaries, talk to me about accuracy, respect for all the members of the forum, and how all of us - including you, can make this a better forum, a more accurate forum, and a more respectful forum.  Lindy
 
 
 
  
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda]Reading and asking a question that is related to the topic is no problem,  It is long discussions totally unrelated to the topic I am talking about.[/QUOTE]

And yet it was asking questions that related to the topic, i.e. AP, that devolved into those long, off-topic harangues. So, obviously, asking questions in that particular forum is anathema.
[quote=Jan Lucinda]It means adults have self-discipline, they restrain themselves from things that are offensive to other people.  Very simple really.[/quote]
Is it simply? I am not so sure that determining what is offensive is simple, for instance expletives, scatological references, vulgarisms, obscenities may be offense to one person, wherein others find evasion, avoidance, deliberate quarrelsomeness, and divisiveness to be just as offenses. As I have already stated elsewhere, I would rather skip over the former than encounter the latter, just as I would rather read incisive, current, and critical evaluations that the incessant bumping of topics far beyond their use-by dates.

[quote=Jan Lucinda]How about people who violate other people's boundries.  Pip started her thread for AP people to share and then suddenly many non-AP people were there all the time.  My understanding is that a thread is started by someone with a topic and they ask people to share on that topic and respect the topic they have posted.[/quote]
Quoting myself..."All that I am hoping for is a reasonable, honest, and forthright discussion with AP as the pivot point. As I have previously stated, I have some questions and concerns that I would very much like to discuss in a rational and non-dramatic manner and without the flit and flutter of what has been so aptly called the Greek chorus (however, AI’s Greek chorus does not, at least in my opinion fulfill the intent of the original chorus: meaningful commentary and summation).

Secondly: this thread, like all threads, has shifted and altered. The ‘new’ adjective was long ago moot and the restrictive, exclusive APers only is neither practical nor desirable on a public forum.

Thirdly: if, as stated, the purpose of this thread is “to share”, then it only seems fair everyone who participates, even peripherally, should be ready to answer questions, clarify statements, and, well, share. Allow me to _suggest_ that everyone keeps in mind that questions are not an attack, and that asking for clarification is neither disrespectful nor dismissive."
thank YOU, LinB and Shug!!!
 
and Lynn and Snow.. you put the "S" in support....
 
this is an argument that will never end... because as you say, people have different interpretations of what is offensive and what isn't........
 
Jan... I fear your world is too tightly managed to allow for an diversifications... I hope not.
 
 
[QUOTE=SnowOwl]I tend to not post things that require backup data, I guess I'm a "fluffy" poster, but there's so much about RA that needs addressing, and being kind and understanding because we're all in this together seems to me to be paramount.  This is a support forum.  People come here looking for other people who understand what they're going through; their doctors give them medicines and tell them those medicines should do the trick, but there's nothing quite equal to discussing problems with other people who are taking the same drugs, or similar drugs, or medicines and therapies that might work better.  Doctors are reluctant to claim that their treatments are the ultimate truth, why would any of us except by sharing that our therapies work for us? 
 
Our experiences can offer hope, but that's all.  We can suggest ways to cope, but that's all, our ways of coping may be torture for another person for whom our ways are too difficult, for whom our medicines are toxic, but we can say, "I understand" when someone is suffering, because we know something about that, all of us, why else are we here.
[/QUOTE]
 
This is one of the best posts I have seen SnowOwl.  Very well put.  I am in total agreement.
 
Pat
TeedOff2009-05-31 17:37:14 I second your opinion of Sno's post!

edited for typo
wanttobeRAfree2009-05-31 19:12:25I third the opinion for Snow's post.  I posted a thread and she posted something that got off the topic and had the courtesy to sent me a PM to ask if it was O.K. and of course it was.  It was an OT topic.   She is a good example, I think, of someone who is considerate of other people, who refrains from posting anything that is hurtful.  We could all learn from her example.I learned a long time ago not to be put off by a thread that suddenly changes direction and takes on a whole new topic. (even when I've started the thread myself) That happens in these forums when one question brings up an answer that brings up a question that leads a different way. Then the next person commments on what was said last....rarely does it go back to the original question unless someone new comes to the conversation who came to the end just to respond to the original question. It happens. Try not to let it offend you.
 
I've also noticed that often when there's a thread that has turned ugly several people will all of the sudden start talking about something random like cheese cake or candy  and I feel like that is often just to get everyones minds off of the crap that's taken over a thread and get them to refocus on something silly (unless of course if you are actually Joonie and your mind is totally consumed by candy corn at that particular moment; Love ya Joonie!) and meaningless. I personally see the humor in this and frankly appreciate it.
 
As far as rules go; there are no rules here. That's the beauty of AI....it does not however mean everyone should act any differently than they would in real life. If people would use the same social behaviors that they do in general public we wouldn't have some of these problems. The people who have recently been stirring up the crap around here would no doubt be totally embarrashed for someone in their real life social circles to see them act that way. Hell; I'm embarrashed for them. It just makes them look stupid and I think by the way the majoirty of us have recently been ignoring it instead of highlighting it just proves that fact.
 
Hasn't the majority of the crap settled down anyway? This is pretty calm for those who haven't seen it at it's worst. Enjoy it if that's the way you like it. It won't last forever. lol
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda] She is a good example, I think, of someone who is considerate of other people, who refrains from posting anything that is hurtful.  We could all learn from her example.[/QUOTE]

And youre an example of a fukcing MORON
I often compare threads that drift with conversations.  That's how conversations flow.. They dont' always remain on the initial subject matter but flow into something else that's equally interesting......

I'm with you Babs - message boards are a form of communication and they'll tend to branch off onto other topics.  Sometimes more, sometimes less - all depends on the audience.  Or, if you're my MIL, it will branch off no matter what.  She makes your head spin sometimes.

[/QUOTE]
 
Henrietta without the signature line:
 
How sweet!
I agree with SnowOwl...I don't put what I take because I don't feel the need to advertise it...my RA history is unique to me as everyone's journey is unique to them.  I can honestly say that through nearly 25 years of RA I have tried just about every med and with 11 RA related surgeries I can legitimately discuss those alsoregarding my siggie.... I thought that's what everyone did to facilitate discussions regarding reactions, dosage, etc...
I have no issue w/ doing it or not....  most certainly does not make one a troll.
Snow and buck-
 
It was very helpful to me when I first came here to know someone's diagnosis and meds when I read their shares so I knew where they were coming from.  I see that some people choose to include it and some don't.  If you choose not to, that is of course your choice and I respect it.   When I was new, I know nothing about RA, it was all totally new, so I can just say that signature lines did help me.
I like it because when someone is talking about issues they are having you can look at their signature line and know what meds they are on with out asking. Doesn't really matter to me one way or the other; but I have found it to be helpful when people are asking for opinions on the way they are feeling. More times than not I don't even pay any attention to people's signature lines. I understand your point Jan but failure to put a sig line does not make one a troll.  And I generally assume that when someone is posting on a RA forum either they or a loved one has the disease or potentially has the disease...but that is just me.  [QUOTE=buckeye]I understand your point Jan but failure to put a sig line does not make one a troll.  And I generally assume that when someone is posting on a RA forum either they or a loved one has the disease or potentially has the disease...but that is just me.  [/QUOTE]

I agree wholeheartedly. However, having been tagged as troll for a whole series of faults and foibles (beginning with asking questions), being tagged as such for deciding on a personally meaningful quote rather than a diagnosis and medication list is merely a trifle.

Like buckeye, it seems apparent to me that the vast majority of those who post regularly on the RA forum have RA by the posts they respond to and/or the questions they ask. However, that too is just me.
I've noticed how nice and quiet it's been since prickcushion, lorster, justsaynomore, lyndeenz, joonie, and pip haven't been here posting their nasty, vile sh*t!  I guess it goes to show who the troublemakers really are.
 
As soon as they come back with their sh*t-stirring attitudes, I'll be here waiting for them.  I've been checking this board out every day and will continue to do so, the minute they start up..."I'LL BE BACK".

[/QUOTE]

Can you be anymore of a loser?Hessalina, can you be anymore of a C_ _T?  We don't need YOU to start sh*t now!
It SUXS when the resident troll is right, huh? 
 
[QUOTE=Lisa0nline]I've noticed how nice and quiet it's been since prickcushion, lorster, justsaynomore, lyndeenz, joonie, and pip haven't been here posting their nasty, vile sh*t!  I guess it goes to show who the troublemakers really are.
 
As soon as they come back with their sh*t-stirring attitudes, I'll be here waiting for them.  I've been checking this board out every day and will continue to do so, the minute they start up..."I'LL BE BACK". [/QUOTE] Phats, problem with ya'll is you just don't like the white girls.[QUOTE=AckingAudrey]Phats, problem with ya'll is you just don't like the white girls.[/QUOTE]
 
Hmmmm, I must've missed something, when did this become a white/black thing?  Anyone know?

 

[QUOTE=Lisa0nline][QUOTE=AckingAudrey]Phats, problem with ya'll is you just don't like the white girls.[/QUOTE]

 
Hmmmm, I must've missed something, when did this become a white/black thing?  Anyone know? Hope the weather is a tad better where you are.
 
Still hope the nastiness is stopped.
[/QUOTE]
If you really want it to stop Jan - quit adding to it - quit stirring the pot and contribute.
[QUOTE=Jan Lucinda][QUOTE=Bodak]I'm a new hand at this game Sandra, only been playing the game for 2 and a bit years, but as you, I have noticed a sh*t.
The seas have been a little on the rough side lately, but hopefully calmer weather is around the corner.
I wish for smoother sailing in the not to distant future.

Hope the weather is a tad better where you are.
 
Still hope the nastiness is stopped.
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