As is common sense, compassion and empathy are missing from society in general and especially in the so-called
countries.
Mecentricity has placed compassion and empathy on the endangered reaction/action/emotion list.
I work with the senior community when we're not traveling and I've found plenty of empathy but very little compassion. We all have empathy in our dna but the willingness to alleviate suffering is what's missing. The willingness to get down in the trenches.
Shug, I know for a fact that you understand and have seen it time and time again. Lynn, I don't know your situation but I have a feeling that you also know exactly what I'm talking about. True compassion is what's missing. I would like to think for the most part that these individuals make up for it in other ways. They do other things that myself and many of us can't, and maybe in the big picture it all balances. Alleviate suffering comes in many forms, money, service, moral support and backing. Many of these things aren't tangible but they're given freely by individuals. These things are what makes it possible for me to work with the senior community. I've seen others mouth compasion and then turn their back. Those are the individuals that don't "get it". This is just my personal experience; it may be far different in other's experiences. Lindy
Wow Lynn. I'm just wondering how much care you're showing your fellow man when you start a thread whose point seems to be to magnify another's flaw. And trumpet your own wonderfulness to boot. Where does kindness, encouragement and humilty figure in to your caring for your fellow man? Just as everyone has their unique strenghs and strong points, we all have our weak spots and flaws too.
[QUOTE=LinB]I work with the senior community when we're not traveling and I've found plenty of empathy but very little compassion. We all have empathy in our dna but the willingness to alleviate suffering is what's missing. The willingness to get down in the trenches.
Shug, I know for a fact that you understand and have seen it time and time again. Lynn, I don't know your situation but I have a feeling that you also know exactly what I'm talking about. True compassion is what's missing. I would like to think for the most part that these individuals make up for it in other ways. They do other things that myself and many of us can't, and maybe in the big picture it all balances. Alleviate suffering comes in many forms, money, service, moral support and backing. Many of these things aren't tangible but they're given freely by individuals. These things are what makes it possible for me to work with the senior community. I've seen others mouth compasion and then turn their back. Those are the individuals that don't "get it". This is just my personal experience; it may be far different in other's experiences. Lindy
I have found that I can have empathy and sympathy for others much easier and deeper now that I have so much empathy and sympathy for myself having this dreadful disease.
I'm just wondering how you decide who gets your compassion and who doesn't. No one here has "walked in Jan's shoes". How come she doesn't get compassion? All she gets is a thread that's aimed at hurting her. If she is hurt enough by this thread will she then have earned your compassion?
And what do you know about the girl who commited suicide? Has she always shown compassion to eveyone all the time? Does your compassion for her equal the compassion she has always shown others? Did she ever make a selfish comment? Do you even know? If you find out that she did will you revoke your compassion for her?
Then you have no right to belittle Jan then Lynn. where is the olive branch that shows itself in these situations.
I have been berated for starting a thread similar to this by youself saying it was a trouble making posting. So you live by a set of rules for yourself and another for others??
I'm just wondering how you decide who gets your compassion and who doesn't. No one here has "walked in Jan's shoes". How come she doesn't get compassion? All she gets is a thread that's aimed at hurting her. If she is hurt enough by this thread will she then have earned your compassion?
Lin if any adult is hurt by something a total stranger has said on a message board then they really don't belong on them. No one has walked in Jan's shoes but she also hasn't walked in ours...she didn't worry about hurting anyone else's feelings when she posted such an insensitive response to someone's suicide. Those who have been touched by suicide in their lives didn't need to see that message. Then for her to post about responsible behavior that was a bit too much, at least for me and obviously for others as wellI try and let live (sometimes it gets the better of me).
The suicide thread was a good thread in my book, it allowed some insights to how others feel about the subject.
I see more positives in the thread than negatives.
I agree Bodak it was an interesting thread...however it could have been introduced with far more sensitivity than it wasEveryone has already stated what they think about Jan's comment. I think it's odd and a bit hypocritcal to use a thread about compassion and empathy as a weapon to hurt or humiliate someone else. And who knows what pushed that girl over the edge? Who knows what was that very last straw? Maybe it was an unkind word from a total stranger. If a smile or a hug can be the thing that gives a person a little bit of hope, can't it also be the the that finally drowns it out? Maybe when we are considering a topic as sensitive as suicide we should all be reminded that our words can and often do make a difference.
Stephen, I also thought it was interesting. Different strokes for different folks. Pure & simple!
[QUOTE=GG]Stephen, I also thought it was interesting. Different strokes for different folks. Pure & simple!
[/QUOTE]
It was very interesting and surprising to read the responses and to see the individual feelings that were posted. Lindy
[QUOTE=Linncn] I think it's odd and a bit hypocritcal to use a thread about compassion and empathy as a weapon to hurt or humiliate someone else.[/QUOTE]
Oh...my...I had (and still admit to being baffled at the idea) NO idea that this thread was a weapon of any kind. I assumed, with all its implications that it was simply a discussion about the terms empathy and compassion.
That's what I thought until I got a bit of the way down and reference to Jan's post was made. Not by you though.I too didn't think it to be a slap at Jan Lucinda. Just a thread concerning sypathy and compasion. I even got that confused thinking it was empathy and sympathy. No Offense,
But, Jan brings her own grief to this forum. She bumps old threads mentioning that they are interesting and when asked what is interesting she ignores. When asked for her journey and details, she's too busy. I do have some compassion for Jan because I do believe that she has social and/or mental issues. But nonetheless, she causes her own grief and I think she enjoys it.
Well, all right. Maybe I'm just way off tonight. Misunderstanding posts seems to be the order of the day for me. My apologies to all.maybe the title should have been insensitivity and compassion-less.
I have been repeatedly told on this forum what a mean person I am... that I attack this one or that one..
and I've said repeatedly that the people here do not know me.
I have sent thoughtful gifts and there are a few on here that I have reached out to when they have felt as the person who jumped in front of the train did... IF anyone has been on this forum for a few months you would have been well aware of their pains and their thoughts of suicide..... And would NEVER have posted what Jan did.. never!!!
I didn't mention these previous happenings because i didn't want to continue to hear about what had transpired with the train and how it was "viewed" by some w/ complete insensitivity... I am ashamed that anyone who suffers as we do, would be that insensitive..
Lynn49. I think this thread is another great discussion thread to help some to reflect inside to what kind of person they are and how they may be affecting someone....
I'm just wondering how you decide who gets your compassion and who doesn't. No one here has "walked in Jan's shoes". How come she doesn't get compassion? All she gets is a thread that's aimed at hurting her. If she is hurt enough by this thread will she then have earned your compassion?
[/QUOTE]
Ok, so the the general, unspoken rule of the board is this: Compassion, sensitivity, empathy, kindness are virtues that are respected and honored by the board. But, if someone fails to show these virtues it is right to abandon them all and and treat that person badly. Further, we believe that doing so is proof of how compassionate, sensitive, empathetic and kind we are. Oh, and if we hurt you as we intend to do, then screw you because that means you shouldn't be here in the first place.
Got it.
model of emotions to facilitate discuss re: emotions. In this
one set of dimensions, the vertical, represent intensity of emotions, another represents how emotions are similar or dissimilar. There are four pairs of opposites representing eight primary emotional dimensions. Even a quick study of Plutchik’s model can be enlightening about the way our emotions act and interact.
Although he does not specifically mention either empathy or compassion, it is not too difficult to see where and how they might fit in the model and where they would sit on the stimulus-effect chart.
Another tool for beginning to examine and understand our own emotions and reactions is the concept of
: emotions we experience about emotions.
If we could momentarily agree that empathy is the emotion/stimuli and compassion the result/effect we might be able to begin to discuss, without undue emotion, both empathy and compassion and our won rational/irrational response to situations/events wherein we believe empathy is the proper emotion and compassion (with action) is the appropriate result.
It is always difficult to discuss emotions and emotional responses and it is doubly difficult to do so on a discussion board.
Well said!!!
Renee
[QUOTE=Linncn] Well, all right. Maybe I'm just way off tonight. Misunderstanding posts seems to be the order of the day for me. My apologies to all.[/QUOTE]
Linncn. You are spot on with everything you have posted on this thread. I admire you for bringing on a different angle here. I see exactly what you are saying here. Thank you for that.Furthermore Linncn. You are an example of a true christian woman. You live by what you believe. You and I have had our share of disagreements but you have remained my friend, despite our differences. Many, including some on here could learn from you. Thank you for your example.Well,
Lorster is full of compassion. She saw nothing wrong with the nurse that killed the patient. Lorster had compassion for the nurse because Lorster knows what a nurse has to put up with and so killing a patient is totally understandable. Oh, the patient? Well according to Lorster, the patient kinda deserved it, afterall, wasn't the patient a part of the problem by being a patient? Yep, Lorster knows compassion. And Lorster, why all this christian stuff? Why do you use it to judge others being a sworn athiest? One day you are telling christians how stupid they are and the next day you try to use christianity to your advantage. Oh, and where is that post where Phatgirl asked for a lesbian relationship with you? You are so nasty to say something like that. But believe me. I have seen your picture, and my advice is that if you get a sexual proposition, be it male or female, human or otherwise, you may want to consider it, it probably won't happen again.
LEV
I am going to preface this with a disclaimer: I am not attempting to humiliate anyone nor cause anyone to have hurt feelings, nor am I referring to any one member of this forum. Rather this is simply a query.
Earlier in this topic LinB make an astute observation regarding a vital part of compassion being the ability to get into the trenches, so to speak, and to do what needs to be done. I am certainly not questioning that observation but am wondering about exclusions from empathy and compassion: should they be reserved for those in our immediate ‘group’, our compatriots, our immediate society, our buddies? Or should both empathy and compassion be experienced and acted upon for everyone regardless of their relationship to us or our immediate society?
Who do we exclude and why? Who do we include and why? Do you have a person definition of empathy or compassion?
Having sympathy,empathy or compassion for someone does not mean that I or anyone else automaticaly agrees with that persons statements or attitudes.
I will stand by one of my earilier statements...if your emotions are so tender that you allow your feelings to be hurt by the statements of total strangers on an internet message board then perhaps you need to find something healthier for you to do with your time.
Spelunker, the question you pose is interesting and one that I think everyone has to decide for themselves in order to make it in a cruel world. I can't get upset about every terrible thing that happens to everyone. I can't feed every starving person or house every homeless one. I can and do take care of my family and those I love, including my friends. If everyone did that, we could all care for our group and no one would be alone. If you don't have anyone you can bond together with others in the same situation and make a family of choice. This works for me and I do not waste time agonizing over any inability I have to help everyone who deserves it.
In my opinion, this is what the human race evolved as the best method of survival, in small groups where everyone knows each other and shares a responsibility to each other. There are too many people now to live that way, hence what may appear to be indifference to the plights of those that aren't part of your village.
so... according to Bluehour...... no one should contribute to orphans, or the homeless, or breast cancer, or rheumatoid arthritis, or march of dimes?
so that in the theory of evolution...... only the strong survive.. and ultimately.. all of us would suffer?
[QUOTE=levlarry]Well,
Lorster is full of compassion. She saw nothing wrong with the nurse that killed the patient. Lorster had compassion for the nurse because Lorster knows what a nurse has to put up with and so killing a patient is totally understandable. Oh, the patient? Well according to Lorster, the patient kinda deserved it, afterall, wasn't the patient a part of the problem by being a patient? Yep, Lorster knows compassion. And Lorster, why all this christian stuff? Why do you use it to judge others being a sworn athiest? One day you are telling christians how stupid they are and the next day you try to use christianity to your advantage. Oh, and where is that post where Phatgirl asked for a lesbian relationship with you? You are so nasty to say something like that. But believe me. I have seen your picture, and my advice is that if you get a sexual proposition, be it male or female, human or otherwise, you may want to consider it, it probably won't happen again.
LEV
[/QUOTE]
Is the above post what compassion and sesativity is all about, if so then I am totally off base? If you have nothing good to say then don't say anything at all. Calling Lorster nasty is like the kettle calling the pot black.
Linccn, Bluehour and Lorster...spot on. Because someone does not see or feel things the way we think they should is no reason to put them down or try to demean them. They have a right, just as you do, to their feelings of different circumstances without being put down. It is not what you say but how you say it so if you would not like someone saying or doing these things to you, then think twice about what you write.
Have a nice day.
Pat
TeedOff2009-06-21 10:53:18Shug, Some people can help in any and all situations that they encounter. They are able to be compassionate and emphatic in all situations. The reason, because they live a life of compassion, period. I've seen this happen time and time again. There are people in this world and in my world who practice this each and every day of their life. It's their priority. I'm not that person believe me, but I do understand their service to humanity.
Blue Hour, I agree totally but it starts with one's self. We need to be compassionate towards ourselves. We need to treat ourselves better. There are people on the forum that do, but there are people that don't. It's like any other situation where there is a group of individuals, some do, some don't. We start with ourselves, go on to our family and friends, and if we're lucky, we can have compassion for others outside of that group and serve in some capacity.
Remeber like many good and bad attributes compassion and empathy to and for our fellow person has a domino effect. A helping hand, some support, some food, a few bucks, clean clothing and a smile - all of these things will live long after we're gone. They have a life of their own.
This doesn't have anything to do with how religious you are or what religion you belong to. It has to do with what's inside you and how you've developed it. Some have developed it through religion, others have it from birth, some have developed it because they've received compassion and empathy from others and are passing it on.
I think everyone has the capacity for compassion and empathy and I don't feel that we know the people on the forum from just a few written sentences. Some things are said for sensationalism, some things that are said are cruel and pointless, but I don't judge those people on what they write on a forum. I may not like what I read but I try not to judge. I would just like to remind them about compassion and empathy. We all deserve that from one another. We are an RA village. Lindy
lindy!! Good point which is IMO, what Lynn49 intended to do.......
I would just like to remind them about compassion and empathy. We all deserve that from one another. We are an RA village. Lindy
she wanted us to look at ourselves... do we have these traits? are we capable?
It had nothing to do with a smack down to Jan Lucinda..... Jan was perhaps used as an example due to her post about being inconvenienced by someone's suicide..... but it is circumstances and issues like that which trigger conversation and discussion.
babs102009-06-21 11:21:30Is compassion, empathy and sympathy innate? I choose to think so, that yes, we are born with the capacity to feel these emotions. However, I believe we are 'taught' in the development of these emotions.
I look to early childhood and see how being raised by my mother and grandparents taught me to be more compassionate, to help when I could, to nurture when a family member was ill or take food to the grieving. These were my roots. But can I walk by an emotionally disturbed, filthy, malodorous man with his had out on the street? Yes, sadly, I can.
Why? Is he not worthy of my compassion? Surely he is, he has done me no personal wrong and I cannot judge how he has come to this place in his life. I can feel compassion and empathy for him, but I do not always extend my hand. Not because he is filthy or drunk or high or mentally ill, but because I don't know how to help him and because he scares me a little too. It could easily be me or someone I know. I am more than a little shamed that I walk quickly by, eyes averted. And so I harden myself a little...
It is easier to give compassion or empathy or sympathy to someone we relate to in some way. Whether or not they are worthy of such emotions seems not to matter as much as how we relate to them. It is not to say other causes or individuals are not worthy because, surely, they are.
Or perhaps, we give of these emotions because of our own need?
Babs, you might be right about her original intent for this thread. She quickly tossed it by her second post. Let's ask her. Lynn, why did you start this thread? If for thoughtful and challenging discussion, then why, by your second post did you change course and slam Jan?
I would also like to know something from anyone who feels like responding. Is there anyone who has not at some point in their adult lifetime had a self centered attitude that was at least comparable to Jan's? This one statement Jan made does not sum up the whole person. I know some find her bumps and short comments annoying (sorry Jan, but I guess you already know that) but she is also often the first one to say something like....I heard their were wildfires in your state, are you all right? Or, were you or your family hurt by those floods? She posts things, deals, stories that she thinks we might find helpful, interesting or entertaining. Did anyone ask her why she was in a hurry to get home? Does her life become less valuable because someone else lost their's? Did she get off the train and curse the deceased or did she simply have a long day and want to get home?
regardless of her original intent..
does she become less deserving of support because she was angered by Jan.. ?? Does Lynn's opinion have less weight for that reason?
does the message mean less because Jan's inconsiderate thread prompted it??
If I was in the train that was held up.. I would probably have been initially irritated and complaining.... but after hearing what held it up.. I would not.. nor would I hours later make a complaint about it.. Life is precious ... even unknown life.
(I don't think for one minute Jan doesn't deliberately bump those meaningless threads, make her rude comments w/ hello's only to APers makes her less than a favorite among the rest of the village... she's quite obvious)
babs102009-06-21 13:50:48not only has she become perhaps a non-favorite among many... but her thread bumping and her segregated hellos show exactly how INconsiderate she is..
Linccn
I quite often get PM's from Jan asking how I am and if my RA ia being helped by my treatment. We all bump topics up , sometimes for others ,sometimes for our own benefit, sometimes to annoy others...most of us have done it. Jan gets berrated for it though.
I think we all have some self centred part of us and we can all be hard hearted, then there is a large part of us that is compassionate. I read Sandra's post on the train thread and our family too experienced a suicide. My husbands Nephew was only 19 suffering from depression he walked into a busy store on a saturday morning picked up a stanley knife and cut his throat in front of a packed store. His father worked in the bank across the road and didnt realise what all the commotion was , he got annoyed as he was trying to leave for lunch and couldnt get out the bank due to the police and ambulances...of course when he was called and found out what it was that had happened he was in shock. 2 years down the line he is now angry at his son, not for killing himself( still in shock) but for the way he did it and causing so many others distress who watched it.
I am more compassionate since being ill , it has taught me humility. most of all when my father died it taught me that life is so short that to hold grudges is silly and to smile at someone could change the course of their life.
Babs, I think that's why Jan was called out. Because some people already dislike her. I think if it were you that made Jan's comment people would say "geez Babs......not cool" but I seriously doubt that Lynn would start a thread specifically to chastise you further. Do you think she would?
And no. I don't think that this makes Lynn less of anything. I think Lynn is probably just like everybody else. Good points and bad too. And just because a person isn't guilty of Jan's particular thing, everyone is guilty of something that others would look at go....I would never.....
"I would also like to know something from anyone who feels like responding. Is there anyone who has not at some point in their adult lifetime had a self centered attitude that was at least comparable to Jan's?" Quote Linccn
Everyone at some point has felt exactly the way Jan felt. I commuted 1-3 hrs. a day for years and many times have been inconvenienced due to accidents, breakdowns, rain, earthquakes and even a suicide. The suicide happened in front of me. I saw it but couldn't do anything to stop it. I was inconvenienced because I stayed and helped the other people that saw the person walk out in front of the train. I was approaching the trainstop and had a full view of the suicide. Only later did the stress set in and I lost work time and sleep. It was a movie that played over and over in my mind's eye. I've been frustrated and stressed due to many inconveniences in my life.
Like Teed I've walked by people who were asking for money because I didn't have the time to stop or it was the 10th person that day that had asked for money. On the flip side of the coin I've taken people from the street and fed them lunch at my expense. I've delivered meals on wheels for years and I think that the times I've not helped are balanced out by the times that I do.
That's how I feel about Jan's post. I don't feel for a moment that she's without sympathy and compassion. That was her moment, like mine, when I walked by and ignored the requests for money from the 10th person that day. I lived in San Francisco and street people were everywhere. We all have those moments. Her mistake was sharing the frustration of that day on a forum. Sometimes it's better not to say anything at all than say something that will cause 5 pages of discourse. Lindy
LinB2009-06-21 14:24:10That's all I'm saying Lin. That's why it bothers me that Jan is being judged so harshly. I mean, I think it's totally fair on her thread when she put it out there. If you do that, no matter what it is you said, you invite comment. But to start a whole other thread, one that starts out great but turns into a sucker punch.....it just isn't very nice.I will merely recuse myself from further discussion in this topic. I tried to keep my responses non-personal and non-argumentative but obviously failed.
No one member should become the center of this discussion, or for that matter, another discussion.
Peace to all, Shug
[QUOTE=Linncn]That's all I'm saying Lin. That's why it bothers me that Jan is being judged so harshly. I mean, I think it's totally fair on her thread when she put it out there. If you do that, no matter what it is you said, you invite comment. But to start a whole other thread, one that starts out great but turns into a sucker punch.....it just isn't very nice.[/QUOTE]
You asked, I'll answer....Was I judging Jan Lucinda specifically.... No, not really. As I remember she wasn't the only person who I felt made inconsiderate remarks about the suicide. Could I have used a better word than inconvienced...Probably, but I didn't.
I'm not a perfect person nor have I ever claimed to be one. I do have a tendency to wear my feeling on my sleeve about certain issues...Suicide would be one on those issues......
I don't regret what I posted and I stand by my comments.
Lynn492009-06-21 14:46:32[QUOTE=Linncn]
Babs, I think that's why Jan was called out. Because some people already dislike her. I think if it were you that made Jan's comment people would say "geez Babs......not cool" but I seriously doubt that Lynn would start a thread specifically to chastise you further. Do you think she would?
And no. I don't think that this makes Lynn less of anything. I think Lynn is probably just like everybody else. Good points and bad too. And just because a person isn't guilty of Jan's particular thing, everyone is guilty of something that others would look at go....I would never.....
[/QUOTE]
I completely disagree..
I feel that if ANYONE made that comment, they would be called out on it.. it has nothing to do w/ the "WHO" as opposed to the "WHAT".
I wouldn't care if it were buckeye (whom I consider ONE of the most level headed and sincere)
How Jan behaves on the site is a small part of why she was questioned....
it's the context of the comments....... not the source, IMO
BTW... the comment to me wouldnt' be "Gee.. Babs.. not cool" I'm sure it would be MUCH harsher
edited to enlarge and color my "I"
Lynn492009-06-21 15:11:58personally, I think you've blown this one thread way out of proportion..
[QUOTE=levlarry] Well,
[/QUOTE]
Lev, did you read my post? Did you really read it? Did you then google about the nurse who killed the patient with 32 vials of Dilantin? You thought I was showing compassion? Did you also go back and research in the nursing community, why other nurses had thought this had happened? Please do your research before you go posting crap like this. I saw everything wrong with what that nurse had done, but my question was, What happened to her, to make something like that happen? You have to realize that she went and pulled 32 vials of Dilantin out of 3 different omnicells. Then, she had to start a second IV to administer all of the drug out of two different partial fills. The question was, did she just finally crack under all the pressure? That post of mine on a nursing thread had nothing to do with AI. You see Lev, you are not a nurse, have never been a nurse and will never be a nurse. You will never get the opportunity to walk a mile in our moccasins. So...please, never judge me for the way I feel at the end of a 12 hour shift or at the end of 36 hour (3days) week. You will never know, and never understand what I go through. The only people on here that do understand, are other nurses who have been at the bedside for 21 years. The ones that have seen the changes over time. So, you lack empathy towards what us nurses go through because you have never experienced it. The thread became so long that I quit reading it. Someday, I will take the time. I will post at the bottom though, my last post to that thread that I wrote two years later. It was a nursing thread, it has nothing to do with what goes on here. But you, like always tend to pull all the negative out of something that you can in order to make a person look bad.
I bring Christianity up a lot because I keep reminding people that they will pray for someone in one sentence and then bash some one else in the next. It is so unfitting and there are very few people on this board that I can say are true to the teachings of the bible. For a support forum, this is one of the most toxic environments on the internet. Furthermore Lev, you do not know that I am an atheist, a Christian, a Buddhist...or what. I do not wear my religion on my sleeve, and never will. There is only one person on this board, that knows how I feel.
As far as Phats. Do you happen to know, for a fact, that she did not say that? Please, proof Lev. I want proof.
If you have my pic Lev, by all means post it for all to see. I would love to see what you come up with. I only have two pics of myself on the internet. I have no problem with people seeing what I look like. There are only three people on this forum who have seen my pics and I trust they will not share them. Here is the post at the end of the thread for all to read.
Re: Nurses are Pathetic!!
It has been nearly two years since I wrote this post and obviously struck a nerve with many nurses and at the same time, many others could relate to my frustration with our profession at the time. In that two years, much has changed for me. I am still working in the same job and even though the problems have not changed, I have. I no longer view us as a pathetic bunch. We are a great profession and have made much progress in the past many years but we do have a ways to go and I doubt it will be where we want it to be by the time I retire in 5 years. I became more active in my union organization. I became a true advocate of safety for my patients. I no longer put up with any abuse from a doctor or anyone else. And man, have things changed for me. I have learned so much and I appreciate everything that was posted here even though some of it was painful for me to read. But this is the start of a very positive position in this profession for me. I only have 5 years left and it will be the best five years of my profession. So here are some ways that any of you can improve how you are feeling about your job. Speak up, don't allow a patient to get in an unsafe situation, go to your manager, if they don't listen, start climbing the chain of command, go to your union if you have to. Don't compromise your licence or the safety of your patient for anything. Don't take abuse from anyone, doctors, managers, administraton, coworkers, or patients. Pull them aside, right away and settle it. You will not be the most popular person on the unit, but you will be one of the more respected members. I finally realized that I was not at work to be popular and make friends but I have made many as a result of being forward, talking to people, and not back stabbing my co workers. I plan on being in this profession for another 5 years and then I'm gonna be a stay at home wife, something I have been wanting to do for years. Again, I want to thank everyone for their comments. I guess I just had to unleash all the frustration I felt at the time.[QUOTE=babs10]regardless of her original intent..
does she become less deserving of support because she was angered by Jan.. ?? Does Lynn's opinion have less weight for that reason?
does the message mean less because Jan's inconsiderate thread prompted it??
If I was in the train that was held up.. I would probably have been initially irritated and complaining.... but after hearing what held it up.. I would not.. nor would I hours later make a complaint about it.. Life is precious ... even unknown life.
(I don't think for one minute Jan doesn't deliberately bump those meaningless threads, make her rude comments w/ hello's only to APers makes her less than a favorite among the rest of the village... she's quite obvious)
[/QUOTE]
I thought that everything that needed to be said was said on the suicide by train thread and that another one was not warranted. It was started because Jan does not fit into the mold of someone's idea of who fits into this villiage. Because she says good morning to the AP people on the AP thread that makes her not eligible to belong to the village. Who cares if she doesn't say goodmorning to you? What is so rude about saying goodmorning to people? I totally do not understand you people.
Well Teed, at least we know who the village idiots are. [QUOTE=Lynn49]
I give Jan exactly the same amount of compassion that she has shown here......... No more, no less
[/QUOTE]
SO WHAT DOES THIS POST MAKE YOU LYNN? CONSIDERATE? FULL OF COMPASSION? TIT FOR TAT IS COOL NOW??
ARE YOUR TRUE COLORS SHINING THROUGH?
Lynns favorite past time is filling page one with study after study so that these threads get lost in the shuffle. Don't get me wrong, her info is useful and I have real a lot of it but it is still what happens to avoid topics like this. [QUOTE=lorster]Lynns favorite past time is filling page one with study after study so that these threads get lost in the shuffle. Don't get me wrong, her info is useful and I have real a lot of it but it is still what happens to avoid topics like this. [/QUOTE]
yeah.. that makes alot of sense.. if you look at the time when Lynn posts her helpful threads .. the majority are posted first thing in the a.m.......... what is she covering then? More like she goes through her notifications from the med sites and loads up what is pertinent to those here.....
so make sure you set the record straight when you stir up the stink.
[QUOTE=lorster]Lynns favorite past time is filling page one with study after study so that these threads get lost in the shuffle. Don't get me wrong, her info is useful and I have real a lot of it but it is still what happens to avoid topics like this. [/QUOTE]
WHAT is up with THAT LOSEstER??? What the hell EVER! She ACTUALLY CONTRIBUTES!!! WHAT do YOU DO???Loki. And what have you contributed? 9 posts and nothing but trashing everyone. Maybe you need to look deep into your own soul and get honest with yourself. Oh, and grow up, its Lorster.
I don't PRETEND to contribute one damn thing. And YOU? I searched your post - LOSEstER - search your on DAMNED soul!
[QUOTE=Lynn49]
I have no idea....And to be honest, I have no intention of continuing this conversation.....If you are looking for a mea culpa from me, you're looking in the wrong place.
Yeah, I guess that is what I was looking for from you. What were you looking for from Jan? Anything?
SEE THE POST "LOSER" FOR MY RESPONSE TO THIS:
PHATGIRL
[QUOTE=lorster] [QUOTE=levlarry] Well,
Lorster is full of compassion. She saw nothing wrong with the nurse that killed the patient. Lorster had compassion for the nurse because Lorster knows what a nurse has to put up with and so killing a patient is totally understandable. Oh, the patient? Well according to Lorster, the patient kinda deserved it, afterall, wasn't the patient a part of the problem by being a patient? Yep, Lorster knows compassion. And Lorster, why all this christian stuff? Why do you use it to judge others being a sworn athiest? One day you are telling christians how stupid they are and the next day you try to use christianity to your advantage. Oh, and where is that post where Phatgirl asked for a lesbian relationship with you? You are so nasty to say something like that. But believe me. I have seen your picture, and my advice is that if you get a sexual proposition, be it male or female, human or otherwise, you may want to consider it, it probably won't happen again.
LEV
[/QUOTE]
Lev, did you read my post? Did you really read it? Did you then google about the nurse who killed the patient with 32 vials of Dilantin? You thought I was showing compassion? Did you also go back and research in the nursing community, why other nurses had thought this had happened? Please do your research before you go posting crap like this. I saw everything wrong with what that nurse had done, but my question was, What happened to her, to make something like that happen? You have to realize that she went and pulled 32 vials of Dilantin out of 3 different omnicells. Then, she had to start a second IV to administer all of the drug out of two different partial fills. The question was, did she just finally crack under all the pressure? That post of mine on a nursing thread had nothing to do with AI. You see Lev, you are not a nurse, have never been a nurse and will never be a nurse. You will never get the opportunity to walk a mile in our moccasins. So...please, never judge me for the way I feel at the end of a 12 hour shift or at the end of 36 hour (3days) week. You will never know, and never understand what I go through. The only people on here that do understand, are other nurses who have been at the bedside for 21 years. The ones that have seen the changes over time. So, you lack empathy towards what us nurses go through because you have never experienced it. The thread became so long that I quit reading it. Someday, I will take the time. I will post at the bottom though, my last post to that thread that I wrote two years later. It was a nursing thread, it has nothing to do with what goes on here. But you, like always tend to pull all the negative out of something that you can in order to make a person look bad.
I bring Christianity up a lot because I keep reminding people that they will pray for someone in one sentence and then bash some one else in the next. It is so unfitting and there are very few people on this board that I can say are true to the teachings of the bible. For a support forum, this is one of the most toxic environments on the internet. Furthermore Lev, you do not know that I am an atheist, a Christian, a Buddhist...or what. I do not wear my religion on my sleeve, and never will. There is only one person on this board, that knows how I feel.
As far as Phats. Do you happen to know, for a fact, that she did not say that? Please, proof Lev. I want proof.
If you have my pic Lev, by all means post it for all to see. I would love to see what you come up with. I only have two pics of myself on the internet. I have no problem with people seeing what I look like. There are only three people on this forum who have seen my pics and I trust they will not share them. Here is the post at the end of the thread for all to read.
Re: Nurses are Pathetic!!
It has been nearly two years since I wrote this post and obviously struck a nerve with many nurses and at the same time, many others could relate to my frustration with our profession at the time. In that two years, much has changed for me. I am still working in the same job and even though the problems have not changed, I have. I no longer view us as a pathetic bunch. We are a great profession and have made much progress in the past many years but we do have a ways to go and I doubt it will be where we want it to be by the time I retire in 5 years. I became more active in my union organization. I became a true advocate of safety for my patients. I no longer put up with any abuse from a doctor or anyone else. And man, have things changed for me. I have learned so much and I appreciate everything that was posted here even though some of it was painful for me to read. But this is the start of a very positive position in this profession for me. I only have 5 years left and it will be the best five years of my profession. So here are some ways that any of you can improve how you are feeling about your job. Speak up, don't allow a patient to get in an unsafe situation, go to your manager, if they don't listen, start climbing the chain of command, go to your union if you have to. Don't compromise your licence or the safety of your patient for anything. Don't take abuse from anyone, doctors, managers, administraton, coworkers, or patients. Pull them aside, right away and settle it. You will not be the most popular person on the unit, but you will be one of the more respected members. I finally realized that I was not at work to be popular and make friends but I have made many as a result of being forward, talking to people, and not back stabbing my co workers. I plan on being in this profession for another 5 years and then I'm gonna be a stay at home wife, something I have been wanting to do for years. Again, I want to thank everyone for their comments. I guess I just had to unleash all the frustration I felt at the time.[/QUOTE] Oh dear so many trolls...how on earth does one person get away with being so many people, its strange how all these trolls come off the same computer....
Phats, does it matter what Lorster posted about you, if you dont like the thread dont read it...your words to others!! Also you have spouted a whole lot of rubbish about my diagnosis, shall I come after you??? OH BOY!!
[QUOTE=Mrs Pincushion]Oh dear so many trolls...how on earth does one person get away with being so many people, its strange how all these trolls come off the same computer....[/quote]
Can you please tell me how you know this? Do you have access to the IPs of everyone who posts on this forum?
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