The dark side of loneliness | Arthritis Information

Jody Schoger felt utterly alone, "curled up like a turtle" in her hospital bed, where she was fighting a life-threatening infection after breast cancer surgery.

"I remember never even opening the blinds, just hibernating," says Schoger, of The Woodlands, Texas. "I even started sleeping with the blankets pulled over my head. I was at the edge of the world."

Like many people with serious illness, Schoger found herself cut off from family, friends and the "real" world outside the hospital, which began to feel like another planet. Although many people would have been happy to help, Schoger says, she never thought to call them. And though the hospital was filled with doctors, nurses and other patients, Schoger — facing her own mortality — felt very much alone.

As her story suggests, the pain of loneliness is caused less by being alone than by feeling alone, says John Cacioppo, director of the University of Chicago's Center for Cognitive and Social Neuroscience.

Researchers are studying the causes and health effects of loneliness — both on the body and mind — in the hope of helping people and communities stay healthy and connected. Lonely people tend to have higher blood pressure and weaker immune systems, he says. Loneliness may even affect our genes. In lonely people, genes that promote inflammation are more active, while genes that reduce inflammation are less active, he says.

http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2010-04-08-isolation08_st_N.htmLoneliness or the feeling of being alone can be a bugger of a thing to get rid of.
I know what it's like to be in a room full of people but some how feel very much alone.

I have caught myself many a time asking myself why I can not be just like all of them,
seemingly with not a care in the world.
These times come and go. Sometimes they hang around for a few days and then depression starts to set in.
When that happens I have to force myself out of the area and do something,.... anything.
Thanks for a most interesting article, Bodak. I have had the dark days when the "black dog" has gotten ahold of me and can appreciate the need to "do something....anything." It really is good medicine.

By the way, Larry C. passed away two days ago after a very long 16-month battle with cancer. He was courageous up to the end and passed away with his beloved dog in his arms. All that knew him will miss him so. He was such a good and kind person. [QUOTE=IslandWoman]
By the way, Larry C. passed away two days ago after a very long 16-month battle with cancer. He was courageous up to the end and passed away with his beloved dog in his arms. All that knew him will miss him so. He was such a good and kind person.[/QUOTE]

Thank you for letting us know, it saddens me.
He loved his photography, sad, very sad.
What is the difference between loneliness and depression?

I do understand when a person is sick they feel alone. We have each other to talk to but the rest of the world does not understand. The people that live with us and see us everyday do not really see us.

I think this is where the loneliness starts for the chronically ill. Sure there are people around. Maybe doctors and nurses or even family. Loneliness stems from having a connection a bond with others.

I shutter to think if I did not have all of you.

I do suffer from depression which is doing better from the meds. I have noticed a greater will to clean and sew and do chores. LOL Still that does not mean my body can keep up with what I have the will to do.

Just to add I did my chores before just not as happily about it before as I am now to do it. LOL That is the feelling of satisfaction and pride about getting things done I feel that more strongly then I did before. I guess a feelling of self worth.

Funny I did not realise that I had lost that feelling until I found it. Depression is an odd thing.

I think connecting with others is part of the loneliness and deppression from an unhealthy body probably adds to the loneliness. Still we are are own best friend. Self pride and self worth are important to healthy mind. If we can not count on our selfs and feel self worth then we would naturally be lonely despite how many people are around us.

My humble opinion is that it is a complicated combination of things. Mind body and spirit. Being sick and stuck in bed is the pits. We all know that. Pain and illness take a deep toll on us in every way. Thier is also a grieving process that we have to go through. Who knows what chronic illness does to the mind and the chemical process or the nerve receptors? I do know what it can do to the spirit.

milly2010-04-12 08:02:27Clinical depression is a well-known co-hort for many with chronic disease and pain. There's a clear distinction between feeling "down in the dumps" and being diagnosed with depression.

One thing we know about depression is that it is often improved with mobility........walking....which tends to activate the brain chemistry.

That's so sad about Larry C - the part where he died with his dog in his arms really touched me.

SnowOwl,

To be clear regarding the statement, " I have a friend with MS, whose neurologist told her to seek psychological counseling for her depression, he told her, 'That stuff is just voodoo to me,'" I'm inferring the neurologist meant that it's a specialty that he doesn't know much about but thinks his patient could benefit from. [I just didn't want people thinking that he thinks it's mumbo jumbo, otherwise he would not have recommended it.]