FRUSTRATED!!!! | Arthritis Information
Hello everyone I want to apologize before I start this rant and unload I have not had to do this for a long time but unfortunately tonight it really hit me like a ton of bricks and I just can't hold it in anymore. I haven't been around for quite sometime and I apologize for that, work, home life, and just plain daily life has just been running me ragged and I just have not been here. I was working for the county in one area but due to budget cuts I was laid off since I was the low man on the totem pole, so to speak. I was called back to help in various area of the county to work as temporary help with no benefits, thank God for my hubby's job where we now have insurance through. I had a bad scare with the daughter this winter she was having severe pelvic and heavy heavy bleeding come to find out she had csyts on her ovaries that were abcessing and rupturing, and on top of that she had tonsilitis but was not showing symptoms till all of a sudden she started complaining not able to breath, we got her into the dr. and come to find out not only did she have tonsilitis the tonsils abcessed and were so enlarged they blocked her airway. She was on antibiotics for over a month and now we have to keep an eye on them and if they get bad again then they will have to be removed. Ra is doing better now and I am relieved over that. I have started to have problems again myself which include my hands, neck, shoulders,, and lower back. The psoriasis has gotten really bad too, arms,legs,,front,, and scalp. My toes are bending under more which can make it very painful to walk. I have resign to the idea I am not going to be doing much work in the yard this year, thank goodness for perennials. I am still doing crafts I just have to take breaks. Rae and I are doing the paper beads and Rae is making some lovely jewelry out of them, she is going to try and sell some at an event in June and she will do her first big bazaar at Christmas time. I roll beads for her in various styles and colors. I can not paint them with the mod podge because my fingers can't hold the beads very well, she does all that. Today Rae made a beautiful necklace for my mother in greens and browns, with lovely silver beads. I noticed she did not tie off the necklace correctly and it needed to be retied. I tried to do it and all I ended up doing is fraying the end of the necklace and then I dropped all the beads all over the floor!! I was so upset and my poor Rae kept telling me don't worry about it Mom I can redo it. I am noticing more and more how my fingers are not able to what they use to do before, I am even noticing it with the embroidery I do it is just getting more difficult. I am afraid to find out what else could happen in the near future. It just plain scares me!!! I am trying to keep a positive outlook because I know what is in store for me since I have been dealing with this for many years now but lately it seems it is so difficult to deal with. I don't want to sound whinny but it is hard not to. Oh I am finding out it is getting hard for me to go horse back riding, I am finding it harder to get into the saddle unless I have a step up and even handling the reins while riding is even getting more difficult. I use to handle carriages and the wagon with the horses hitched up but now I am afraid to be the driver because what if something happens to spook the horse or horses and I can't rein them it? Again I apologize for my pity party but I just feel so angry and sad. meme Morning Meme, The progression of this disease is beyond my comprehension. It moves quickly and is insidious.
What meds are you on now? Maybe you need to talk with your doctor and switch meds.
I design and make jewelry and can't do much of what I used to do and like you, I'm extremely frustrated. I was making silver jewelry but my hands won't allow me to saw and finsih the silver, I can't do the small detail any longer. What I did was start redesigning older pieces of jewelry and working larger. I take pieces apart and redesign. My biggest problem is how clumsy I've become.
Think about changing drugs, it might help. I've been off meds for over 3 months due to a URI that won't go away and hopefully will be starting back in May.
I get so frustrated and angry sometimes but that's gotten better as I've learned to compemsate for some of my clumsiness.
Take care and let me know how you progress. Lindy
Good to hear from you Lynn hope things are gong well. I am starting the usual regiment, I have been off it for awhile due to the fact I was doing so well and seem to be absolutely pain free for so long, but now I have gone down hill so fast it is so scary. I have been trying to keep up the exercises to help the body but I am feeling a lot more pain in the back and the hands are just not complying. I can do some embroidery but I must make sure to take lots of breaks, the paper jewelry I can make the beads but I can only do it for so long then I have to rest. The small detail work I can no longer do with my hands, fortunately Rae can work on that no problem. I have already told my husband I won't be able to work like I usually do in the gardens due to the body not wanting to comply and as always he is my biggest support and told me not to worry about it, that he and Rae are here to help. My heroes!!!! Meme, I was happy to read your posts but not happy with the direction you're going. Talk with your doctor about the change in your condition. You may just need a small tweek in your meds.
Easter day was quiet. We went out for brunch and then back home to spend the day putzing around the gardens and house. I'm still working so anytime at home is pleasurable for me, especially since spring is here; it's green, blossoms on the trees, radishes and lettuce coming up, daffs blooming and Iris's ready to bloom. My DH does the heavy work and I get to do the planting and we take turns watering. The same goes for the inside of the house. I do have help with housework but once I quit work later this summer I'll do most of the housework. Remember it's ok to do things a different way and to compensate. Even if we didn't have RA we'd still have to learn to do things differently because we're aging. Take care and stay around for awhile. We have several people on the forum who are clueless to what our lives are like but it's easy to ignore their rhetoric and rudeness. Lindy
Lin I have been staying away from the Ra forum due to the postings there. I am watching my diet and making sure I am eating nutritional food to help the body. I am glad you had a nice Easter and am glad to hear you are going to be home full time soon. I have been working on sorting out the files in the department I am in right now and this is a royal pain due to the filing is not going to be like the "normal" files. This is going to done according to grants and areas of the county. The young lady who is normally in this department has been out very sick and she will be coming back soon but I will be staying there for a couple more months helping get things organized and hopefully they will have another place for me to go after I am done there. I have been suggesting they had a floater for the various departments to share. I am hoping it will happen. I told Rae she owes me so much for all the items I got for her beading etc. and her boyfriend will be helping too due to we have been doing alot for him. the poor kid lives with his dad and his mom, who lives out of town, doesn't want him around. We got him his clothes to wear for his first job and have bought him clothes,shoes, etc because his dad is not working at this time he has been very ill, and there are other kids in the family. So I told him he can repay us by doing yard work this summer, when we need help. I had a hard time walking out to the car tonight my back was aching along with the right shoulder, and the knees. I swear I am falling apart lololol. I have talked to the rheumy's office and they are going to see about increasing the doages a little but I am staying off the mtx due to issues it does to my body. Have a good night Lynn. meme I am SORE SORE SORE!!!!!! I have been putting things away from winter, not the winter coats yet though, and I am aching from filling the boxes and stacking them away. I found where the mice have been getting in while I was storing items away and have corrected that so hopefully no more mice. They don't stay around long once they get a whiff or see the cats though. My little herd of cats are pretty good at catching them. I thought maybe since it was so nice I would go out and pull debris out of the gardens but after finishing up the storing away of winter stuff and working on meals I am too pooped to bend anymore.
Of course I forgot to take my meds this morning so that even makes me sorer. I am going to rest and take it easy because tomorrow we are taking my mother and mother in law out to brunch. My mother's birthday is on Monday and with Mother's day coming up and both our mothers like each other we thought we would take them out to an earlier Mom's day meal. Since there is 8 other brothers and sisters in my family and 5 others in his, we thought we would do it earlier so others have a chance to be with our moms. I can't wait to go this is a real nice place and their brunch is awesome and the dessert bar is WOW!!!!
So folks have a good weekend and
Nice to hear you are cheering up its good for you to let it all out the stress and all i really hope you have a great time and make sure you get lots of hugs and emotionally support you need.
http://www.arthritisjointpaingone.comAmmy thanks for the advice but that does not work on my skin due to the psoriasis, I am going to go see the dr and see if maybe we can find something to help with the psoriasis. meme Hi Mem, I've been out of action for a few days, had a heart cath, etc. looking for reasons for my heart issues. Anyway, Am glad you're going back to the doctor for the psoriasis. Let us know how you do.
F&T, your posting of the site is all well and good but the advice should be used along with RA meds, not in place of RA meds. because damage will continue. Lindy
Hi Lin I hope you are doing well since the heart cath, my skin is just so painful
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