Let's see. I took dogs for walk for about 40 minutes. I walked my limpy, gimpy walk while Tyler ran blind circles around me. I would tell him go play and he would run out in front of me but then look for me. It is good, he is learning not to lose me now that he is going blind.
Then we went to bank, opened an account finally, post office, bought stamps, pet supply store for dog and cat food, pharmacy, for the first time since we have been here - Kelsey and I both have our meds - grocery shopping - so scared - only had 0 and I need it to last a month. Only sale items. I think we did it. I was so afraid I did not have enough at the register. Lots of peanut butter jelly, eggs, chicken, chili and salmon was on sale for tonight. I have left but I think we are going to make it. Oh, and I had to go to one of those cigarette stores to buy Kelsey's cigs. I am quitting with Brett gone. We cannot afford them. Anyway, the tears started coming down at grocery store and I was limping badly. I did not bring pain pills with me as it scares me to drive. Kelsey was AMAZING. So helpful. Really good about putting things back when I said we could not afford them.
My Kelsey was the best. I think she instinctively knows when I need her to help me and not ask too much of me. She brought in all the groceries and put them away.
I finally got a pain pill. Still have to go check the mail down the street and rent a couple movies like I promised. We are on one of those monthly rent movies accounts.
Truth is, I did not know if I could do it all. I am so proud of myself. I am so relieved Brett is gone. His problems drain me. I can do this. I was going to get on the phone to get disabled services for both Kelsey and I but I am too burnt out. I will do that Monday. I know the doctor here will support me. She was totally supportive and knows I am very disabled.
Monday I go see pt and do some water therapy. Tomorrow I am supposed to go to a family b-day party for three, including Kelsey in our family. The TV guy is supposed to come between 1 - 5. Dinner party is supposed to start at 5 so praying he comes early. They have stood me up for THREE appts.
My Enbrel helped a lot this time. I gave it to myself even though Brett was home as my independence is becoming very important to me. Social Security said that if I am approved, I will be getting disability before the end of the year.
Also, I put an advertisement on Craig's list for tutoring.
Sorry for the constant rambling but you guys are my outlet. My family does not handle me not being my old self well. I am so grateful I have you.
I can totally relate about being to tired to sit on the phone...it is the stress of dealing with that kind of stuff...I do the same thing...screw it...it can wait another day.
Its almost Friday night...time to kick back and relax!!!
You should be proud Roxy!!!I was married to an alcoholic...I am now divorced...and he really was a drain on me and my self confidence. I hope Brett comes back from rehab in better shape but use this time to build your self confidence in case he doesn't. Best wishes dear!!You know, having to help you out here and there may be just what Kelsey needs right now. That's alot of importance and belonging that she's going to get out of that, no matter how silly that may sound. A little bit goes a long way. The way you discribe it makes it sound like she was getting something out of helping you, which is great.
As far as the 0 a month for groceries....welcome to my world!!!!! Ramen is a lot better than you think it is....LOL You can make it. We do all the time. Are you a big left-over eater? We make meals for 4, because sometimes it's cheaper than buying things meant for 2. Then we just do several left-over days. The crock-pot has been a HUGE help. I preach that sucker all over. We make a whole chicken, or a roast, and then make sandwiches out of the extras for 2-3 days.
You can do eet. You can do eet ALL NIGHT LONG!
sorry...water boy reference..
You did an awful lot and so did Kelsey. Even your dog cooperated. Yes, dealing with someone else who isn't coping with their problems is about the most draining thing in the world.
You should check out the food banks in your area. Some of them will even bring you an emergency box of food.
If I have to force myself to go to the food bank, you can to. It's only temporary until you get other things in place. I was glad I went today. It gave me the opportunity to give a man and his mother a ride home. Otherwise, they would have had a 3-mile walk with their food, most of it perishable.
Sometimes you go through the rough spots so that you are there to lend the next person a hand.
You did a lot today so have some rest time! What you did today and doing your shot yourself are the first steps towards rebuilding your self esteem and your strength. Both inner strength and physical strength. I'm just wondering if Kelsey was picking up on all the stress between you and Brett and was acting out. Now that some of the stress is gone, she may come around a little bit.
Dan and I have been there done that more than once with very little money for groceries.
You do not constantly ramble. And I'm glad you have an outlet. This is way too much for you to carry around by yourself. We are always here for you.
I hope your Enbrel continues to help as much as it did today. I bet it feels great to have accomplished so much today! Sounds like everyone is trying to cooperate and help (Kelsey and your doggy). Bless their hearts. I'm saying a prayer for you, that your disability is approved. It certainly should be! That would be a big help. If you get it by the end of the year (Social Security?) , that is really fast. I sure hope it comes through for you. Now, take some time to rest yourself. That's still important
Gentle hugs and blessings, Nini Thanks Guys. I laid down and was exhausted after I folded some clothes. Took a percocet and napped. Then I woke up wide awake, built a fire and put some pictures on the walls. Truth is, I know I am over doing it a bit but before, in my house of boxes for three months - I was so bored and unhappy. Every day I have tons to do and it makes me feel good. I am trying to think of a way to get out of family party. I just don't feel like driving. Driving hurts me, does it hurt you? I am enjoying the house with just Kelsey and I. She made hot dogs for dinner. MMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMM Good. Works for me. Tomorrow they finally put the satellite tv in. 150 channels and I never watch tv. I hope I will find shows I like so I can keep my butt on the sofa more. I overdo and my body feels it. But boy, the house looks great. I found the camera. Try to remember to take pics tomorrow. Anyone willing to help me post them? It has been raining a lot. Worried me because when the rain first came I was in agony. You know what, I am used to it now and it feels soothing. It is not a cold rain like when it started. Kelsey is excited about us having the house to ourselves. Brett called tonight and I told him. I am glad he is gone, I am sick and tired of his moods. He didn't like to hear it but it is about time he realizes I won't keep putting up with this. Feeling good and tired tonight. Still working on Colton's room. He is coming Nov. 30. We have to rent a truck and go down and empty out Brett's garage. Colton's bed, dresser and etc. are in there. I sincerely love Colton. Well, good night all. Good day
Glad you found your camera... where was it???
I just posted a couple of pics and I just opened up 'my pictures',
clicked on the one I wanted and dragged it to the message...
there it is... I amaze myself sometimes. I'm not very good at
this computer stuff!
Will you send me your address? (Mailing address). I have something for you.
It was in my computer bag - of course
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