TODAY I ALLOWED MYSELF THE LUXURY OF TEARS. I DONT KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. I WOKE FEELING OK, THE STIFFNESS DIDNT LAST M0RE THAN AN HOUR. BUT NOW I HURT IN EVERY JOINT AND MY FEET ARE SWOLLEN,BRIGHT RED AND SO SORE, MY HANDS ARE NUMB AND I FEEL SO TIRED AND DEPRESSED, I HAD A HUMIRA INJECTION A WEEK AGO (MY FIRST) AND HAVE STEADILY GOT WORSE OVER THE WEEK.MY DOCTOR WANTS ME TO HAVE A SECOND DOSE NEXT WEEK BUT I AM SO SCARED NOW.Pin Cushion, We don't have a ton of options but one option we do have is to grieve. Let the tears roll. It seems to help me. Don't give up on Humira and don't be afraid. It has helped a lot of people. You have to check out all of your options. Have you tried any of the other biologics? Cry me a river Pin Cushion then you will be able to stand like a tall tree with a few crooked branches
Alan
Hi Pin Cushion, Don't feel bad this whole weekend was so painful for me to. I din't know what to do the pain meds didn't even help. I cryed to both days my knees feet hands fingers where really bad. It's just this ra it is crap if you ask me. I hate to go to bed tonight because when I rest and have to get up is really bad. Thank god my husband helps me with many things. I don't even know what sleep is anymore..Even if I sit at my computer to long I have pain getting up. So I know where you are coming from pain pain pain go away. Right. So you hang in there and things will get better I hope for you. JoanI agree with everybody - sometimes you just have to let it out. We spend a lot of time trying to be strong for our families, friends and ourselves - sometimes there is great strength in grieving, as Roxy said. I'm sorry that you had a terrible day - don't give up on the Humira, give it a bit of time.
Many prayers headed your way.
Jen
Hang in there sweetie. *big hugs*PC~Give the Humira some time....Maybe consider asking your doctor to give you a shot of cortisone to get you over this hump until it starts working better. Maybe even a short course of predisone? Are you on Methotrexate also?
I've been on Humira & MTX for two years now. Still not comfortable with the injection process itself; but it's made a dramtic difference in my well being. A few seconds of pain is well worth it for the relief it brings me.
Don't give up!! (And cry all you want; Tomorrow's a new day)
pin cushion, like everyone else has said, tears are ok! You need that release. As for the humira not working yet, unfortunately it does take time. Something to get you through the pain for awhile seems a good idea. Many of us have done that. I refused any pain relief drugs for a while, then gave in when the pain was just too much to bear. Didn't have to take it for long, but it made all the difference between agony and functioning. Good luck!!! I have been telling everyone how I just dont cry...'cause usually I dont...but even I had such severe pain today that low and behold I had some tears. So even for a person like me with a heart of stone, this RA will break me down. I dont feel bad for it though...it is what it is, and for alot of people tears shed bring some relief. I hope you feel better soon.I hope the tears had some healing power this weekend and that you're feeling better today.
Roxy, what you said, yeah. The option to grieve. The tall tree. I'm putting that in my journal.
Thanks for all your words and support. It was such a bad day. I feel slightly better toay but couldnt get appointment with my rheumy so went to my Dr instead.Had an xray for numbness in my hands and pain in my feet.walking is just so painful. I was on mtx but the side effects were horrible, i am only on humira and pain meds.I have had gold injections but they had the reverse effect and have been on more meds than i care to think about all with bad reactions. I hope everyone else is well today and once again thank you all, just knowing that there are people who understand helps so muchdont worry pin cushion, when i first tried the biologics, i flared up as an initial reaction too. Its one of those things that you have to endure for a month. Meanwhile use this time to curl up with a heating blanket with a nice book. Pop a vicadin and turn on your favorite television show. Heat up some RA gloves in the microwave and veg out.
Crying is essential. I don't even have to hurt to start crying. Sometimes are just like that. When the pain is really bad, you can bet I cry. I usually go in the bedroom by myself and cry so no one knows just how bad it is. The next thing you know, I'm asleep. I might not feel better the whole rest of the day, but the next day is usually significantly better.
Tears are not being weak. They are just an emotion like love and anger. With RA and these meds, it is common to cry and feel a loss of emotions.
And Crunchy, no one is ever going to peg you as hard-hearted.