I took my Enbrel last week - NOTHING. I took it yesterday - nothing. Today in the middle of the day, all of a sudden I could walk and decided to get something done around here. I found myself really yelling at Kelsey. The kitchen was trashed. Spills not cleaned up, food in the sink even though the sink next to it has a garbage disposal, food that should be refrigerated left out - I WAS FURIOUS. Anger can work to your advantage - I sent her to room and dug in. Then the other thing that is bugging me since I am getting a new dog is the deck is covered in leaves so they have been doing their business out there and tracking it in the house. I offered Kelsey to rake it and she kept saying tomorrow, 15 more minutes, and on and on. I got an email that my new dog is in transport and I couldn't take it any longer. I raked off the whole deck in the rain. Now I am stopped. Took a muscle relaxer, aspirin and a valium and I am going to zone out the rest of the day. But it felt GOOD - I got something done. My body is sore but it was worth it. I hate staring at messes and things that need to be done. Finally I got to be productive
But, I know how you feel when you suddenly realize that you feel decent enough to actually DO something. I tend to overdo big-time, then end up suffering for it for a couple of days. But, boy, does that one day feel good! I just wish it was longer than 24 hrs, 'cause it's not enough to do all I want to do and usually one day is all I get at a time.
Honestly, though, I hope your Enbrel is really going to work for you for a good, long while, now. You are absolutely due for a repreive.
Now try to rest and snuggle up under a warm afghan, (with a nice fire if you feel like it).
Gentle hugs and Blessings,
Nini
Nice job! Glad to see you bouncing back. Remember tho, baby steps and don't over do it. Getting stuff done really makes me feel better when I have been down for the count. The most frustrating thing for me is loss of independence since this flare started. It is hard to depend on others when you are usually the caregiver. But I have learned that even I need some TLC sometimes too and I should accept it.
Glad you are feeling better Roxy! Have you ever considered using a kitchen time when you are doing work around the house? I learned this method from someone else with ra. They pick a room or a chore that needs doing and then set a timer for 15 minutes. they work until the timer goes off. then they reset the timer for 15 minutes and rest until the timer goes off. I have found that this works for me because it helps me pace myself for the entire day. I was used to hitting the ground running and running all day long until I feel into bed at night. Can't do that with ra! Using the time still gives me a sense of purpose and a feeling of accomplishment. I even use the 15 minutes of rest to make notes on chores that need to be done, grocery lists, errands, pay bills, balance the check book, etc. that way it seems like I am not "resting" because I am "sick" just doing something that I have to sit down to do. Hope this will help!
jamie
What a great idea Country Girl. Thanks Liz, Nini and C. Girl. I am amazed, I worked hard for like an hour. Got a lot done. I do know I need to slow down but it was like I just knew, if I just accomplished raking the deck and the kitchen, I could be content the rest of the day.
So far, I am still doing better. I am re-thinking morphine. I want you guys to know that Deanna may have been my medicine. She let me ball my eyes out and tell her all of my anger and fears. She is an amazing woman. Then Brett called right after and he was supportive. What a difference a day makes.
I am praying the improvement continues and I am going to take care of myself. I was starting to think Enbrel had quit working
I am having fun starting a My Space. I am so computer illiterate, it will take me some time but it will be so fun to share my music and favorite writings, etc. 12 days until Brett comes home. He told me today he is going to work hard at the marriage.
I see the dream that you are reaching for. Don't stop reaching. But find peaceful times too. The myspace thing is a good idea. Having something you can see progress through can really help you through those days when it seems nothing can be done. I find it in my writing.
Love you too, girl.