Don’t Mess With The Kids! | Arthritis Information
A little
girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was
physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was
a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated
that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated
that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically
impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask
Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The
little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".
A
Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were
drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As
she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the
drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher
paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing
a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a
minute."
A Sunday school teacher
was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year
olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy
Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our
brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest
of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."
One day a little girl
was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She
suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out
in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked
at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white,
Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong
and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns
white."
The
little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma,
how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
The children
had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to
buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look
at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or
'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room
rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
A
teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make
the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as
you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes,"
the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the
ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow
shouted,
"Cause your feet ain't empty."
The children were lined
up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of
the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the
apple tray:
"Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further
along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of
chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want.
God is watching the apples.
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