This is long but we need prayers | Arthritis Information

 

I have been worrying about my daughter in law. My eldest  son 37 got married 3 years ago and it was a godsend to have another woman in the family ( She is 29) . I am 60 and never been a grandma either so, I have secretly hoped for them to have children.

3 months ago they announced they were pregnant. How exciting can that be!

There is a problem though. When my daughter in law was 6 weeks, she got a fever and her head started to get get swelled and her neck too and she went to the doctor and they put her on a 3 day steroid and the swelling came down and all seemed OK. Then she started losing her hair and now she is 5 months and she is bald. She had a rash a few weeks ago and Im not sure if she told the doctor. I am guessing she did. I don’t want to call her about everything my son tells me and frankly he’s really bad at giving details.

I don’t want to make this sound like she is not being taken care of so I will tell you she has a good gyne for the baby ( At first she had a real jerk of a doctor and she switched) and she gave her a name of a dermatologist and they said she had alopecia.

No one wants to treat  her because of the baby.  She is 5 months now So, the doctors want to wait till the baby is born before giving her any medication. ( I don’t think real alopecia can be treated)

My feeling is this whole thing started with the swelling of her head, then the hair loss then the rash.

Could this be Lupis?

My daughter in law is staying away from everyone. So, I am mostly talking to my son and he dosent really want to talk about it anymore either.

I wish I could just give her my hair or just click back to last year .

People say it will grow back but I don’t think it has much of a chance if she isn’t treated right away.

They found out the baby is a girl. I am praying they both will be OK but, You know it

Makes me cry that such a wonderful thing turned out to be a nightmare for them. I don’t know how my daughter in law can deal with this.

A few weeks ago I took her out to buy some maternity clothes and we went to Meme’s and they have such nice things. She looks wonderful in everything. She is wearing cute baseball caps and I made her some fashionable scarves. Maybe people think she has cancer 

She smiles and dosent want me to think she is sad and depressed but I know how depressed she is. My daughter in law is so beautiful with or without hair.

Please pray for her, she needs a real miracle.

Sorry I just had to get this out somewhere. When talking to the relatives I just smile and say that I am sure everything will be OK . I don’t want to be negative.

If anyone here has heard of anything like this I would be really grateful if you could let me know about it and how it turned out.

Maybe its some kind of autoamune thing and the baby could be in danger.

Barbara

Dear Barbara,

I'm so very sorry for your family's problems. I don't have any answers to offer you, but I did want to give you my support.

My thoughts and prayers are with you, your son and daughter in law. Not knowing what's going on is so hard to deal with.

Hugs and Many Blessings to you all,

Nini

 

I am so sorry as I don't have any answers but I sure am a prayer warrior so will get on it.

Take care,

Please know that you and your son and daughter in law are all in my prayers.  Im sorry i cannot offer anymore then that but sometime that is all we need. Keeping faith that God can cure us, or make people better does wonders.  Just remember we are all in His hands and he knows what he is doing.

Barbara -  Please don't jump to conclusions.  Most female hairloss is due to hormonal imbalances.  And during pregnancy your body is in hormonal chaos.  I have a friend that lost huge patches of hair during her pregnancy and it all grew back after the birth of her perfectly healthy child.  Prednisone can cause baldness too (usually caused from long term use)- so can inflammation (again long term).  I don't think it is permanent though.

Secondly, if her hairloss is truly caused by "scaring alopecia" then it won't grow back - but chances are very, very slim for that.  Once her body gets back to normal - I'm quite confident that her hair will grow back.  Most alopecia is nonscaring.  Alopecia is just the medical term for baldness.  ie:  alopecia areata = area or patches of balding, tension alopecia = balding from pulling hair back into ponytails or behing caps.

She's seeking medical care and a dermatologist IS the correct doctor to go to for baldness. 

Please try not to worry.

 

Trixie6639065.5751967593Thank you so much for your comments and prayers. I did talk to my gyne and she said in nineteen years of practice all the hair loss was after the pregnancy. She has never seen it during the pregnancy.

However, It sounds like on a daily basis her health in general is OK. And the doctors are watching.

Trixie I hope you are right. I know I am having anxiety over this.

Thanks
Barb

Barb~

I will keep your daughter-in-law in my prayers as well as your baby granddaughter. What a blessing she will be to you all.

I know you don't want to crowd your son and his wife; but maybe drop her a note on occations and call her just to say hi....she might welcome the opprotunity to be close to you.

 

Barb, I'll keep all three of them in my prayers.

I was thinking as I read what you had to say about your DIL how nice it would be for you to send her a card with thoughts like that in it and then maybe place a little locket in the envelope so that she can be reminded that no matter what, she has your love and support.

I think she is lucky to have you.

Will you be my mother in law? I seriously need a new one!

I don't think your DiL having AA would have any effect on the pregancy - if that's indeed what she has and not a (much more common) pregnancy induced hormonal imbalance like Trixie said.

If she does have AA, the infection she had may have triggered it. Her hair could grow back as soon as the immune response calms down.

 

Lynk39065.8415625Barbara, congratulations - you're going to be a grandma!  That's is wonderful!

I would urge you to not jump to conclusions about your DIL's hair loss.  As you will see if you do a google search on temporary hair loss, hair loss is often caused by hormonal changes, or fevers.  Didn't you say she had a fever?  That type of hair loss is almost always temporary.

I was pretty sure this was an autoamune disorder because it happened after the fever and swelling. All your comments have made me think this is temporary. I am going to go back to thinking that way for her. Thanks

I think the note idea is great and I am going to start that after Christmas when all the celebrating dies down and winter settles in.

Yesterday was her birthday and my husband and I called and sang happy birthday and she was laughing ( we sing terrible). 

I am making a quilt for the baby. My dil dosent know that I have the left over fabric from the hem of her wedding dress and the fabric will be in the quilt.  She is going to be surprised at her shower in march.

RAsara, I have waited so long to have a daughter in law that I will not screw things up. She is as precious as any daughter would be. Although she has a mom I want her to know she can count on me as well.
Your MIL is missing out on sooo much . She is so lucky to have such a smart and sweet daughter in law like you. If I could, I would be your MIL any day.

All this support has made me feel so much better now, thanks so much

Thanks for keeping them in your prayers

I had a lot of my hair fall out when I had my hysterectomy.  As soon as I got on hormone therapy, it came back.  Think -   You are going to have so much fun spoiling that little girl. Congrats!  Being a gramma is soooooooo much fun.  They have tons of cute stuff for little girls.  I can go nuts buying stuff for my granddaughter.  I feel the same way the others do.  Don't jump to conclusions.  Everything is prolly just hormonal.  Will be praying for your family!Grammaskittles, You can be my daughter. What a young grandma.
Yea Im planning on the girls are fun thing. I raised boys and it was wonderful. They are such good guys and I know I am lucky. But hey a girl  would be great.  My nephew s wife had a ultrasound and they said GIRL it was BOY.

The baby is due in the middle of April. It is so exciting in one way and worrisome in the other. Hard to describe that feeling. However I am going to try to be as positive as possible.

Roxy, If I were your motherinlaw my son would be in really really  big trouble.

My sons father was an alcoholic. We were married for seven years and I left with both kids 4 and 5.  He was abusive mentally and physically. He was a real jerk. Thats when I was 28 years old. I met a wonderful guy when I was 40 and we will be married 20 years next May.

The right one can come along even if you dont beleive it. I didnt. Ive been watching your posts and realize that everything happens in it's own time and I know the right answers will come for you. You are in my prayers and thoughts. I was in your shoes and it is so confusing.

Thanks
Barb

Congratulations on the soon to be born grandaughter!

When I was pregnant with my 5th (already had 4 boys) I had an ultrasound and the Dr. told me it was a girl. He reminded me every appointment afterwards. I did the nursury in pink and blue. Wouldn't you know it but I had another boy!!
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