Quote from Daisy and her complaint that I did not adequately appreciate her "concern" and anger that I did not adequately answer her questions. My response is also pasted.
Roxy, I am glad you are feeling better. I do not post much but I have become addicted to reading about your life. What I am going to ask you will not make me very popular with this message board but there are a few things that just do not make any sense to me, so here goes.
If you had a stroke, WHY are the doctors not being more proactive in determining the cause and trying to prevent another one? Are the doctors that incompetent???
Now here is the big question. I know you have said that Brett reads the things on this message board, Is this the way you are communicating with him now??? Is it your way of letting him know how much he hurt you by leaving??
I guess I just have a difficult time understanding how you can do the things you did the other day, when I can not even clean my house, go out for the day shopping or garden which I really miss.
I am glad you feel better, but please follow up on the stroke it is serious business and usually if you have one you can have another in jut a short time.
Sorry if this comes across wrong, but I just had to say these things.
Then I took the time to address your questions -
I am happy to answer your questions. My stroke symptoms were tremors, electrical shocks (at least that is what they felt like) hearing chains in my head and weakness. At one point the left side of my face went slack. I spent three days in bed but the fourth day, I think it was, when my aid took me to doctor to get meds. It was the first beautiful sunny day. I was weak and the chains in my head were still there but I was just high from not being home wondering when I was going to die. There is no paralysis from the stroke. So all I can tell you is I went to a couple stores (not gardening) after stroke and cleaned my house - which with Brett getting his stuff off the floor only meant cleaning up my few messes and dishes. Kelsey vacuumed and we did dishes together. It did not take much to get house clean as aid has done some - not much housework. When I say I cleaned my house it was the livingroom, bedroom and kitchen - period. Percocet makes me wired so I felt energetic and I always have cleaned when I am stressed.
As far as Brett reading this board, I think it has been a year since he has except maybe two posts I begged him to read. He had no interest. In fact, he took very little interest in my RA and would say anything he needed to know about RA, I would tell him. Also, he only went to two doctors appts. with me as I could not drive. When we went to the thrift store, I could not even carry the stuff I was buying, my aid did it. That is all I can tell you except I have found I have no desire to talk to Brett. I left message with his family to not let him call me as I am frightened of stress so near my stroke. I didn't want to get upset. Being with Brett on drugs was hell. He was yelling all the time and complaining about taking care of Kelsey and I. Since my stroke, my family has come down three times to help around the house and my aid twice. I am pretty blessed.
I can see your suspicions. I thought when he told me I had a stroke he would put me back in the hospital. I was shocked when all he said was avoid strenuous activity, stress, get off ra meds, and take aspirin. He said there was not much else that can be done. The damage is done. I was lucky, it could have been much worse. I have felt better day by day because I had no idea how stressful it was living with Brett. Even Colton, the house is quiet and so much more peaceful. I feel less stressed. I even went to Easter dinner. I did have a hell of a time making it up the stairs where dinner was at. The day after, well for a few days after, all I did was rest and feel fear I was going to have another stroke and die. I could not research as my thinking was effected and comprehension was very poor. Reading also hurt my head. Thank God, I had that day out to appreciate life, accept the stoke even though I can't wait to see a neurologist and move on.
Brett does not even know the name of this board. He will never come here again I am sure. I also am sure he has gone way downhill. He is really really abusing drugs I have heard. Very messed up all the time. I don't wish that on him but that is the choice he made.
I have not read all the posts on this thread but I will go back and do that and answer any other questions. There is no medicine for a stroke unless you have high blood pressure which I don't and I don't need pt as I am not paralyzed. I am feeling better every day. The peace and quiet and help from people has been wonderful and I feel very lucky.
There is no IF I had a stroke. It is VERY obvious on the cat scan. As far as gardening, one day I sat on a retaining wall and dug 1/2"down and planted seeds BEFORE THE STROKE. When I got knocked down and sprained my ankle trying to do a stand there, let the dogs run walk, was BEFORE THE STROKE. Real dog walks - it has been about a year. I go to the park with my walker or cane and stand on the grass and my dogs GO. They take off, when they are far enough away - I call them back and then say go play again. That is my dog walk. I can't walk around the block, I can't use a shovel or lift anything, all my doctors say my RA is aggressive as I have only had it less than three years and have so much damage. I also am unable to do what seems like most things. Maybe the misunderstanding is my personality. I have always been hyper. It is hard for me to sit still so I do what I can do. My "go shopping" was stopping at a thrift store and saltwater fish store using my cane. Mostly I use the carts or others shop for me. I love it when I can walk and I walk whenever I can walk. It is not far or often
As far as my aggressive RA it is determined by the fact that every time I have MRIs more damage. I have damage in my feet, ankles, knees, hips, wrists and hands. Also my blood work. It is also considered aggressive because the meds have not controlled it and it has been really debilitating. You did not know me before. I truly was in super good condition and the change in me is pretty depressing. I will say this thread was pretty depressing. I share so much about myself here and have always been 110% honest, even when I did things I was ashamed of. I never thought that honesty would be questioned. Maybe I am sensitive because it has been such a stressful week, but I am hurt and want to cry that people could question what I shared. I will tell you, not having Brett here yelling all the time and me feeling guilty for not doing more, has done wonders for my stress level. It is good Brett leaving and the stroke coincided because I probably would have had another stroke if I had to come home to the tension that was in this house. I am scared I am going to have another stroke. My family and I are already addressing how to take care of Kelsey and what I want done as far as funeral and possessions. I have never talked about that to my family.
Lorster - I am sorry if you are offended but I have spent little time on the board and only read posts to cheer me up - being selfish. I did not think it was a TMI because that is not what the catscan or doctor said. I don't know the answer. The sad thing is, I am so loyal to AI, I never thought I would be attacked like this. I have been light headed and my reading comprehension is poor. I hope I am reading more into this thread then is there.
PS I came to the board tonight for encouragement as I don't want to die. I get scared when I am alone and this week "hits me". The possibility of having another stroke and the possibility of losing my house. Now I feel stressed. I feel like my friends turned on me
Daisy, You have successfully chased me off the board that I have been coming to for over three years. I cannot handle the stress. The stroke you seem to think I may have made up has made me much more conscience of what is good for me and what is not. Your and yours negativity is not. You have pretty much convinced me that the consensus agrees with you. I did notice you have four threads now started on the first page. I guess you are now getting the attention you need.
I will miss all the people that have supported me, trusted me, I have supported and trusted.
Please talk to your doctors about getting you started on blood thinners such as Warfarin/Coumadin. When my husband had a stroke he had no damage except for a speech impediment and sometimes it is hard for him to get words out. They put him on a regiment of blood thinners to keep him from having another one. He has not had problems w/high blood pressure or other sorts of problems.
Please ask them about it. You may not believe it but I wish only the best for you. Please talk to the docs about this, OK. They kept him in the hospital for a week to make sure his Coumadin levels were where they ought to be. I know you checked out before the stroke had been determined, so if you called back now they might have a different plan.
Please take care of yourself. We may disagree on some things, but I so hope your life takes a turn for the better and your health gets better without all the stress in your home.
Best Regards,
Crispy
I agree, post what you want, as long as you are not intentionally hurting anyone and you never do. If people don't want to read your posts, or anyone elses for that matter, its their right to skip them. Love and hugsRoxy, Please don't go! I have come to think of you as a dear friend and would miss you terribly.
In fact, if the people I care about start leaving this board I will have to do the same. I can't stand what has happened around here!
Where is the comfort we always had? The ability to share anything, just as you would with any friends?
What's going on with all the picking on each other for such childish reasons? Folks, I am 59 years old, well past that stage.
I will just have to see how things go
Nini
An opinion, no matter how tactfully put can still end up like an a**hole. (everyone has one, but no one wants to hear anyone else's)Dear Dear Roxy,
What do yo want me to answer as to who I am, I think if you read my posts you would know. I have spent many posts explaining myself. You and your friends have attacked me and called me names. I know noone likes to hear things they don't agree, with, we obvious just have different opions and I am sorry you do not appreciate mine. I did ask you a question, it was not about your symptoms because I had read them on one of your posts, if you look at your reference above the question was:
If you had a stroke, WHY are the doctors not being more proactive in determining the cause and trying to prevent another one? Are the doctors that incompetent???
You have left that unanswered. I repeat, I lost a dear one to a misdiagnosed and undertreated stroke and do not want the doctor to give you the rub around.
You can all call me any names and insult me, I cried all morning, I guess vultures have feelings too, who knew??
You choose to answer only select questions that is all I was saying In another post when you stated Brett had called your Brother for 1/2 your money, Nini asked why he asked your Brother and not you?? Please answer that. SURELY since you are such a good person and 110% honest like you state, you would NEVER hide assets in your brother's name to recieve state benefits. Sorry this is the CPA, financial person in me.
It is so sad if you feel I shouldn't be able to post here. It is this kind of thinking that has kept so many of us quiet. I have been reading this board for 4 years and afraid to post most of the time, It took my courage because I didn't want to offend, but I felt sooo strongly about people dying or living with damage from mistreated strokes. You don't have to read my posts, but I hope I can share and help someone. I know I have learned alot here and on other sites. Please don't judge and disregard people as being mean or nasty because their opinions are not yours. I hope I can learn something from everyone I meet in my life!!! I have joined the group here I feel very sorry for you and you have my sympathies, but maybe not for the same reason as others here.
Karen
Cassandra,
I don't know what "current condition" of Roxy's you are speaking of, she has been this way since I came to this board. I suspect for much longer.
Who in this discussion tried to run of Deanna? Where did that come from? I know I didn't, and I'm pretty sure SOD or daisy didn't, so what kind of crap are you stirring?
Phats
What I don't understand is why Roxy has to explain any of this to you? Why does she need to justify her actions? I don't agree with all her actions and I do tell her that. But she is still my friend whether I agree with her or not.OK, I respect your opinion. I think I'm right on the money with Roxy, but that is MY opinion.
Hold on there a minute Deanna. You are attacking me when I haven't even posted on this thread? In what way have I caused more personal conflict? I have not.
whoooo are you..who who who who...whooooo are you who who who who..
sorry had to add :D
We gave my brother money from our retirement for "emergencies". Not that that is any of your business. Also, my rd is trying to rush me into a neurologist and I am supposed to hear this week. I have been taken off all RA meds. I don't know why the pcp did not give me more medicine - he said it was too late, that I was no more at risk since three days had passed and my bp was fine and he said to check back in in two weeks unless I had more symptoms.
PLEASE TO ALL THAT HAVE PM ME, I HAVE NOT ANSWERED PMS. I am exhausted and stressed. You have been so supportive but I want to be able to respond from the heart and be coherent and find myself coming here to defend myself instead and then I am exhausted.
Daisy, you have caused me way more stress than I should have ever allowed to get to me. You and your buddies have ruined this board. It used to be such a loving, supportive place to be. I will no longer respond to your inquiries or threads.
DRAMA QUEEN
who who who who, awww tell me who are you?
Lesle?? That's my guess! Did I win?
Deanna,
Your answer to :What I don't understand is why Roxy has to explain any of this to you? Why does she need to justify her actions? I don't agree with all her actions and I do tell her that. But she is still my friend whether I agree with her or not.
She doesn't have to explain anything to me, but I was attacked and treated very poorly for asking the question?
Roxy,
I am very glad you are trying to get into a neuro, the PCP really should have done that the same day he told you!!! UGH!!!! doctors!!!
I am sorry by asking this question I caused you stress, I never meant to, I just never realized it would!!! No one has Ruined this board it is still up and running, it is only ruined if you let it be. I have had too much of this!!!! You have been extremely cruel. I am so sorry you feel I am not worthy to post here!!! My "buddies" are just people that have not jumped on the bandwagon, to be cruel and mean to someone that they do not know and even have not taken the time to read ALL the post. They see a chance to attack and rant and rave, and there they go, without anythought of what they are saying or who they are hurting. They justify themselves by saying they are sticking up for you!!! Well if they read all the posts they would know I did not attack you and I did it out of true concern. We are a SAD group!!!
Karen
Who's Lesle?? I feel left out !!!LMAO.. thats all i have to add....Oh, Daisy, LMAO means laugh my ass off =)
Lesle was member on 4RATalk and is now a member on Rheumamisfits. She is the avatar lady!! Oh!!! I will have to use that one!!!!! Someone PLEASE make me LMAO!!!! [QUOTE=now & then] Lesle was member on 4RATalk and is now a member