what is it with some people that they cant understand that life isnt always about them. I have ( or maybe had) a close relationship with my cousin , she is on her own with 3 kids and has had various medical problems which she is over coming with little support from her parents so I have tried to help and support her when needed. Not because I have to but becase i want to. I used to drive her places, be a listening ear when she was down and babysit. She has been battling deppresion for years and was offered a training program as a volunteer to other sufferers. She asked me to look after her kids while she went and i said yes.2 days before the program i became ill and had swollen legs ( i did post some pictures) I couldnt walk and was referred to the hospital so I called her and said i wasnt going to be able to look after the kids.........she hasnt spoken to me since, or returned my calls and i since heard that she is really cross with me for letting her downPlease take care of yourself.
Hi Pin Cushion - that is so sad that your cousin has taken that attitude. A lot of us here have had problems with friends and family not understanding RA
and I really wish the Arthritis Associations would be more proactive in explaining how this disease can affect us, that it's not just a twinge in a joint or two.
Could you print off some of the stories from this board and post them to your cousin. I have started to keep a folder of different postings (without the name of the board for obvious reasons) and I am being more assertive in explaining how serious this disease can get and the consequences it has on many peoples lives. Deanna has made some very good postings explaining the disease.
Some people cannot deal with illness, maybe from fear so she may be one of those. She sounds fairly ungrateful for all the help you have given her so I would at least try and tell her how hurt you are and pass on some info on RA. It is not just our bodies that get affected by this disease, it is a roller coaster for our emotions as well.
I hope she stops acting like a spoilt brat and realises how much she has let you down.
Kind wishes,
Hi Pin,
Maybe this can be part of her training course - as a support volunteer to people with any condition she needs to learn to understand people and empathise a little. Sounds like shes fairly involved with her own problems right now and too preoccupied to seriously consider yours!
Hang in there, she will probably come around once her world slows down a little. I have a feeling she'll come back to you.
Cheers, superwoman!
Nelly
I'm sure she will the next time she needs something. But then she's going to have to consider how to go about asking you. You do have to teach others about RA. From what information is out there, there is no way they are going to understand any way. In the states, the commercials for arthritis relief make it sound like you take a little pill and then you are back out racing across the country. Then the news media only wants to focus "cures." No one really tells it like it is, not even a lot of our doctors. It's like they want to hide it from the world because it is too ugly. It is ugly what it does to one over time. It strips so many things away from you and then attacks your body as well.Exactly, It seems like if I just take one Aleve in the morning I will be great. And even the commercials that advertise websites. My hubbie is always saying see go there. I have to explain that all the ads for websites like Twofutures.com and such are by drug companies to promote their drug. Poor guy he means well, he always feels so helpless he can't cure me!!!
Karen
Sorry i did mean to say that she has RA too so she knows how it can hit at anytime. oh well i think maybe she was just really upset at waiting to do this course then it all fell through cause no babysitter.I hate to let anyone down but i no longer apologise for being sick cause it isnt my fault and i dont do the guilty thing either . I have been there lots of times and shrunk the t-shirt in my tumble drier
Why i'm on the subject, does anyone else forget stuff in the drier and shrink it??? or loose socks in there?