With Brett gone, I have had time to do a lot of introspection. I can honestly say - RA has done something for me. I have time. I have my wonderful home that I love to be in. I have my daughter back. But you know what RA has done that needed to be done and is an ongoing project ??????????
I have spent hours upon hours looking at my life, my personality, my interpersonal interactions, my deeds, and I have consciencely worked on my behavior, my outlook, and my values. Many of us never have the time to do that. I can honestly say that I have changed in positive ways because of RA. I would never have taken the time to really look at myself. I was having too much fun. I was not a bad person but we all have personality quirks that we just never address. The two I have been working on the most is "interrupting' BAD BAD BAD - I get all excited and interrupt - how rude - and addressing hurt feelings when they happen. Communicating - always follow a negative with positives.
You know what else - I love how open and honest I am. I feel it is a blessing. I have nothing to hide. That is something I will never change. I love me even though I can be quite critical of myself.
I hate RA but without it - I would have always focused on my surroundings and my love of nature and my passion for the high of pushing my body. That is all fine and good, but looking inside - I am grateful that RA has made me stop to look. I love being a work in progress. I see potential. Wow - potential with RA. What a concept I think it makes you take a second look at how valuable and short your life
can be. we must make every attempt to make the best use of each and
every second we have. it has made me more health conscious and i make
better decisions about my health, nutrition, activity etc. I'm sorry that it took
this for me to stand up and pay attention. A patient told me not too long
ago. "we spend the first 40 years trying to kill ourselves, and the last 40
years trying to stay alive". While that is not true for all of us, it is certainly
true for me. Roxy, I am glad you can see the potential. I am condierably older than you and consider me a work in progress.
I hope I never stop learning. Glad you are back.
Roxy I have acquired a compassion for others that I did not have, and would never have had time for before RA changed my life. Some of my precious time I use to help women fighting drug and alcohol addiction and putting their families back together.
It is nice to look at the positives of having an incurable, progressive degenerative disease.
Roxy, Just want to say I'm so glad to see a post from you !!
Will write more later.
Hugs, Nini