I first am so relieved that I am not dealing with Kelsey right now. I am trusting she is in good hands. Last night and today I got a horrible flare, I am literally bed ridden. I cannot get out of bed, my legs will not hold me. My aide and Brett are taking turns caring for me. The hot - cold thing helps. I have been feeling bad after my Humira every time then I feel better in several days. This time I am experiencing truly being a cripple. Thank God for puppies and good days.
Oh Roxy, I am so sorry. I can somewhat relate to the physical aspect. I've been dealing with a really stressful situation too. I immediately went into a flare and it was the worst I have ever had. My husband had to wait on me hand and foot until the prednisone kicked in, and he never once complained. I'm so thankful for my husband. It was the first time I had ever been like that. My thoughts and prayers are with you and with Kelsey.
I just got a call. Kelsey is being admitted to hospital a minimum of 7-14 days.. Kweenb, Stress and RA flares are DEFINITELY related.I always thought that stress caused my RA to act up and I guess you have re-affirmed this.Roxy- I don't know your whole story, but have read bits and pieces.. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with all of this! That's wonderful that Brett has been there to help out. I'll be saying a prayer for you and your family!!
roxy, when my kids were babies, and I was totally sleep-deprived, stressed out, covered in spit up and hormonal someone gave me a great bit of advice: You're no help to anyone until you first help yourself. Think about it, when you get on an airplane and they give you the directions about if the oxygen masks drop down, parents are to take the first breaths and then give it to their children. That's what they say. You HAVE to come first so you did the right thing. Kelsy is where she needs to be right now and you are helping you so then you can help her. Good luck, take care!!!!I've never heard that on a plane Honey; but it's good advice.
Roxy; what else did they say about Kelsey? What are they treating her for? The flu? Hope things will soon settle down for you and your family. I'm real sorry things have been so hard on you. Hang in there.
Sorry this is off topic, I'm just shocked - Lovie, you've really never heard that? O.o You sleep on airplanes don't you? LoLI've never heard it either and I fly at least once a year. Guess I slept through it. Maybe I just don't remember? I honestly don't remember ever hearing that.LoL I remember it probably because I was always the one who was making fun of the emergency announcements. *bad kid* I know I know......lolKelsey is being treated because she is unstable from throwing up her meds. She needs 24/7 supervision as she is hazardous.
The good news is my doctor prescribed me "Chantix" to quit smoking. She also raised my oxycotin. I hadn't smoked in years until Kelsey came back. I thought I could have just one, once in awhile. I became addicted. I don't smoke a lot, 1/2 pack at most a day, but I hate them. This chantex is supposed to work really good and when she comes back, I will know I can't smoke one. Truth is, it is a relief she is in there. I just wish she wasn't so angry with me and would call. But the house is so peaceful............. I needed this rest. I think I have the flu she had. I can hardly raise my arms. Another reason it is a good time to quit smoking. I can't believe I ever started. I have always been so health conscience but she chain smokes and I thought it was like a bonding thing. HOW STUPID. I am really excited about quitting and Brett hates it. He is going down now to pick up the Chantex. Anyone else ever quit on it? I am curious so if I don't get any responses on this thread, I think I will start another one about quitting smoking. Roxy - there is a book on giving up smoking by Alan Pease or Alan Peasy, think he is Australian and many people swear by it. Amazon probably have it. When I think back all the years ago I gave up smoking I smile when I hear the glowing reports this book is given and wish it had been around then. Someone else may have the exact title but it is prob. something obvious like How to give up smoking!
Roxy, i am on my third day of chantix. my quit day is julu 9th. i am worried because i am under so much stress right now, it might not be a good time for me to quit. But is it ever a good time to quit? good luck, keep me posted. kel Wow I feel so much better today
So today Brett is trying to decide where to look for a job. He is concerned about me and would like to stay closer. He has been so kind to me. So Let Go, Let God to me is the best words I have ever heard. Second day on Chantrix. So looking forward to getting these nasty things out of my system. I NEVER thought I would ever start again. Amazing how addicting they are, I just hate the nasty things. It sure is peaceful around here with Kelsey gone......... I am out on my patio enjoying the birds, flowers and sprinkles of rain. Angie and Brett totally cleaned out Kelsey's room yesterday. It stunk so bad it made me wretch. We are looking to buy her a new bed - again. Everything is coming together as it should. I am not a religious person, but I do have a God and he is with me these days. Glad to hear you're feeling better and finding the balance in your life once again. As far as Kelsey, keep in mind that she is finding her balance as well and it may take more time for her with her illness. I have no doubt that she will call once she is stable and back on track. The important thing is that she is in good hands with professionals, getting back on her medications and she is safe. I am out on my patio enjoying the birds, flowers and sprinkles of rain. Now that sounds wonderful, I'd love to be there enjoying that. Peace & Love...Neasy Roxy go ahead and call me an unsupportive b**** but I am going to say it. You should not bring Kelsey home until you resolve your own co-dependent, bi-polar acting issues. Brett drinks and does drugs because of your RA, you smoke with your seriously mentally ill daughter because its a bonding thing. Kelsey is unstable i npart because she can't handle your RA...maybe but also because your are unstable. You are more worried about your daughter hating you than getting the help she needs. She ended up in the shape she was in because YOU didn't react the first time she threw up her anti psychotic medication. When the time comes mentally and physically that you can make decisions based soley on what is good for your daughter not what you want then you can be a capable caregiver. Right now from everything I have read you aren't capable of that at this time. Your decision making and thought processes are all over the place. One day you are depressed as all get out the next you are eupohoric and ready to take in foster children. On top of that your physical health is poor. Leave Kelsy where she can get help and take care of getting your own mental and physical health before even thinking about bringing her home. If you bring her home in 2 weeks she'll only be back in the hospital in a few months. Really put Kelsey first for a change Sorry, but shouldnt this thread have been started with OT??????????????????????????????????????????????
Here we go AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THANKS BUCKEYE, FOR SAYING WHAT I HAVE BEEN THINKING
PHATS I deleted what I said. It was inappropriate for a public forum even though I meant it and still do. It should have been sent in a pm. I also believe that you are right, public forums are no place to share details of your life. Roxy, Maybe the alternatives are not as hellish as you seem to think. Maybe they are the best for Kelsey at this time. Junctioncity posted that Oregon had a program called Respite Care that would give temporary care for 1 hour on up, you replied that none of those programs are available there, and then the next thing you know you posted that the hospital had put her in Respite care. HMMMM maybe you should take more time researching the mental health system in Oregon and what is available, it is sad you did not even look into it after someone posted it here for you. You posted that you called the social worker beause Kelsey would not behave, that she was peeing and sleeping every where and using the blankets, and not covering her mouth when she coughed, you said you called so that it would scare Kelsey into behaving. SAD You were more worried about getting germs from your daughter and that you would get a "life threatening illness from her" than about how sick she was and comforting her. I can imagine it is not an easy situation, but maybe it is best for both of you right now. Please put Kelsey first and do what is best for her now. Roxy, We actually do know what is going on. Primarily because you post multiple times a day, every day. Additionally, for someone who claims to be so "sweet" and "nice", your post to Buckeye was beyond nasty. Could it be that you have a guilty conscious and Buckeye hit the nail on the head? That person just gave their opinion, which is what everyone does here. You were plain nasty and rude. Phats WAY TOO MUCH UGLINESS HERE. Hope it all turns out for everyone. AMAZING. YOU DON'T KNOW sh*t ABOUT WHAT HAS BEEN GOING ON. YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME, YOU DON'T. I HAVE MY DAUGHTER HOME BECAUSE THE ALTERNATIVES ARE HELL. F/U PS YOU ARE A BITCH AND I HAD MENTAL HEALTH OUT THE FIRST DAY SHE THREW UP. [/QUOTE] First of all Roxy,you are wrong!! Everyone knows everything about you and your personal life. You put it out there for everyone in the cyberworld to read!! Don't get me wrong , Im not trying to start another fight thread and I've stayed out of this mess with you from the beginning. I did think at one time people were being too hard on you and felt bad for you and your situation and I still feel bad for you. But now I agree with alot of the other members who are just up to their necks with all of this mess!! I believe it's okay to go into some of your problems but it's everyday with you. I thought personal threads were supposed to start with ''Off topic" but this one didnt or I would not have read it. Seriously Roxy, you and your family need help from a professional. I dont believe any of us can help you but to say how sorry we are for you and Im sure that gets old too. Im not trying to be mean but please, please give us a break. Tara I hope everyone sees Roxy for what she truly is. As soon as someone disagrees with her, she lets loose with both barrels. She is accustom to crying the "poor Me" song and dance, but this time, she is clearly the aggressive one here. After all, she did tell Buckeye "F**k You". That is pretty aggressive in my book. Phats Roxy; I certainly wish you and your family well. I wish no harm to come to any of you......but you have been coming here long enough to know what goes on here. Why do you always seem surprised and tell us you won't be back? As long as I've been coming to these message boards you have been telling some of the most personal details of your life and then acting as if your feelings are hurt when people (Not all "evil" either) honestly tell you what they think of what you are saying. I don't want to hurt your feelings.....but for you to AGAIN say you won't be back is a bunch of HOGWASH! What you mean to say is you won't be back today.....or maybe this week. Try to take care of yourself. It's probable a good idea if you do take a break from "bloggin" for a while. Or maybe like someone has suggested before you could create your own person blog. That way it can be all about you and no one will have a right to say anything. (Only a suggestion) Roxy, Lovie has said what many people would like to say but in a kind and gentle way. No one here is evil Roxy,they just are confused about all your contradictions. I, and I'm sure most everyone else hope and pray you and Kelsey get the help you need. I do believe it is available if you look hard enough. Mentally disturbed people do get confused and delusional so please look deep within yourself, without anger, and look for the truth about yourself. Only then will you be able to see what your own problems are. Or, go back and read your post's and you will understand why people assume the state of mind you are in. At the very least please prioritize your issues for all your sakes. When you took Kelsey back you knew you were sick and she was sicker so your responsibility is first to your child. I say child because she is obviously not mentally an adult. Things seemed to be going so well for you two till Brett and Colton came back into the picture and Kelsey became VERY sick (your words, not mine). I posted from the beginning that if you didn't get her to a Dr. she was going to lose all the affects of her meds and you would be dealing with all the problems with her all over again, and it happened. You discredited every suggestion you were given about respite, Dr's , cigarettes, hospital, and / or anything that may benefit Kelsey til it was too late and she regressed horribly. You admittedly barley kept your anger intact and seemed to be more worried about you getting sick and Brett having to come into a situation like that. Gotta wonder who comes first here IMO. You seemed to be more thrilled about seeing Colton than attending to your own childs need. IMO again. I'm pretty sure you will take offence at what I am saying but I beg you not too. Mental problems are nothing to be ashamed of, the shame would be in not getting the help you need just like you do with your physical issues.. Take Care and God Bless Your Family.. Roxy, you and I joined this forum at approx the same time and I have always supported you. Still do! Always will! Early on, I tried to ease your mind that RA was not a "death sentence." You listened. You went forward. Now it seems that you've gotten so far off track that it seems impossible to guide yourself back in the right direction. It's not. Let people help you. People WILL help you. You have to help yourself before you can help Kelsey, Brett or anyone. Get yourself well and THEN go help your loved ones. It's very hard. I think for the most part, no one here wishes you any ill will. There's no shame in having a "hard-head," Just try to understand that at times, you are crying out for any "suggestion" as to how to deal with everything and your AI "family" are trying to help you as best we can. We are trying to help as best we can and that's all we can do. WE become frustrated when it seems your not wanting to listen. We that care about you and wonder why you want to remain in the same vicious circle. Sure, your loved ones are so very very important to you as are all of our loved ones to us. That's why YOU have to be well and strong and have a stable environment around you to help THEM. It's not impossible yet it won't happen overnight. Help yourself first Roxy, that's very important. We all want what's best for you! Bookworm, Roxy comes here for support but it is not supportive to continually say "oh you poor thing" to someone who has shown time after time she is unwilling or unable to do anything to change her circumstances. Roxy has a lot on her plate and she is obviously overwhelmed and not handling things well. She needs far more help than anyone on this board can provide. Ignoring that fact is not helping her. But as long as her decisions or lack of decsions were only affecting herself and the other adults in her life then it is really her problem. However, now she is making decisions that have and will impact the life of someone who cannot make decsions for herself-her daughter Kelsey. Based on her communications with us Roxy is barely able to care for herself no less her seriously mentally ill adult daughter. Letting that go by without saying anything is something I for one could not ignore. Roxy needs mental health help. She needs to deal with her need for attention, she needs to learn to deal with her illlness, she needs to improve her self estem to eliminate her co-dependency. she cannot properly deal with Kelsey in a healthy manner until she deals with Roxy. Support means telling her the truth whether she want to hear it or not. Welcome Kate, You are going to get to know alot of people on here and most of them are just plain great!! We all have shared our home life to an extent but no one goes overboard with it as much as Roxy. Ive been here for several years and most of her posts revolve around what's going on at her home. It's okay at times but nobody wants to read that all the time it gets old quick. No I dont have to read it but I mistakenly did on this one and it's seems her life has taken over the boards lately. We all like Roxy and she knows that we wish her well but give someone else a chance to have a bad day or two. I have run out of answers for her. She needs to talk to a professional to work out all of her problems. This is an RA board not a psychotherapy board. Hope you stay around a long time and you will see the pattern. She says she's gone but dont worry she'll be back and it will be the same old song and dance once again. Then everybody will be mad at everyone who is getting tired of it all and on and on again
Roxy, I was also a foster mother and I know that respite is NOT only for the mentally ill, foster parents can get respite for the foster child or adult living in their home, you must ask for it whether its for a day, week, etc. You lose your foster pay during that time, but all foster parents need a break sometime. Once a week the agency that you had Kelsey thru should have had someone come in to give you a break. I loved my foster son, but when he decided he wanted to go " I LET HIM GO". Now that I have ra I must put myself first. You cannot give Kelsey the care she needs if your health is not good, the stress will only make you worse. You do not need to discuss your personal life on this forum, why put your business in the street, I know you say that you are not a religious person, but the Lord is the only one who can really help you with your problems. "GO TO HIM WITH YOUR PROBLEMS, HE WILL WORK THEM OUT". The people on this forum is not the one, everyone here have there own problems. I am not being rude, I wish you the best. Sorry this is so long. I have a few concerns myself. After reading much of Roxy's posts the past year I can see that she does a lot of taking and not so much giving to the members here. This is just my opinion. Roxy has Kelsey at home for the $$$ she recieves each month. She posted about how Kelsey is very sexual. Why would Roxy allow her daughter to go off with Brett for walks and outings? That kind of scares me. I have been so ill with this RA that I have felt like death warmed over and when I feel like that getting on the puter is the last thing I want to do. Roxy, you need to get a grip. I have one word for your life. Dysfunctional. To add to the last post.... And she lets her go and hang around the skate park, What does she think she is doing there???? Roxy has absolutely no idea because she lets her go unsupervised. That makes me a little nervous, it isn't like she is going to the library..... MaeMae~Kelsey is Roxy's daughter. She isn't her foster parent. The comment about her being a foster mother steams from an idea Roxy had a one point to make extra money after her husband left her. We all screamed "BAD IDEA!" but she didn't like that advice and thought we were all just being "Mean" to her. She also pitched a fit when we all said "BAD IDEA" when she wanted to take in school age children after school for daycare. The poor woman can hardly take her dogs for a walk. How is she going to care for children every afternoon while their parents work? I certainly wouldn't want my children in her care. I've been a member here for a long time. I've heard every detail of Roxy's life including when she's got the craps. Sorry; I don't need to know that. She uses this forum like a diary and then gets mad when other's don't stroke her and pat her on the back. Like BUck mentioned......many of us do not feel it's supportive at all to continue to encourage that. The situation with her daughter was borderline neglect. She's a very ill young woman and I don't blame you Roxy for wanting to care for her at home. She gave it a good try but the best thing she can do now for her daughter is to follow her care through the system and work to find her the best situation possible. She wasn't even well enough to go to the hospital with your severly ill daugher. She had to have her husband who has been gone for months take her alone! That right there should alarm anyone. I can't even imagine not going with one of my children to the hospital even if they had to put me in a wheel chair once we got there. I don't mean to jump on the beat up Roxy ban wagon.....but I think at this point we can all agree that we're no longer helping her with our "Support". And Katie~I agree. It's all about Roxy. Never does she offer any "Support" to others. If she even comments on another persons problem it QUICKLY leads back into a "ME, ME, ME" situation. I hope what Roxy says is true and she won't be back to read this. I don't want to be cruel.......but I think we've all heard enough! We are all in agreement that Roxy does indeed have conflicting issues with regards to her RA, Daughter, pets and with Brett. We all have very personal problems to deal with on top of coping with RA and other illnesses and we all do try to help each other out with advice and maybe sometimes some harsh words to bring us back to reality.Its what being part of this board is all about. The only difference is that we try to listen and take advice on board and Roxy doesnt.She reads our replies then does what she wants anyway , I think thats because up until RA hit her she was a very very independant person who had a huge job with lots of responsibilities, so its hard to let go of that kind of life and be complacent and accept this illness. Roxy - if your reading these posts, please get some help to accept that you do have a chronic illness and your whole life will change because of it, you can not look after a sick daughter and lots of pets and yourself and deal with Bretts problems. We are all in the same situation as you with regards to our illness, some worse , some better but we all go through the emotions of it. I too have read back and everyone that has tried to be supportive hasnt had any support back from you, this is a two way street, even if they are one word answers if you feel really bad, at least it shows that you care too. I really hope Kelsey gets better and when you are both mentally well then you will be able to help each other. Just to fight the stereo types of the lives of families with mentally ill children - Less than 1% of parents with a mentally ill adult child has them at home. Kelsey big bucks that she contributes to the house is 0 monthly. I have three beautiful bedrooms that I could rent each for that, but no roommates would live with Kelsey. That 0 goes toward food, clothing, rent and 24/7 supervision. Your ideas that Kelsey would be better off letting the mental health dept. care for Kelsey - Kelsey walked out of the institution she was in and was on the streets an entire day, very very unstable. She found her way home to me at 2 am. They had her meds wrong when I went to check on her. She got NO one on one and had to deal with daily people who are threatening and psychotic. She ate horrible food and walked around in peed in clothing. You people who are so big on giving advice - maybe YOU should do some research. I spend my life researching resources for Kelsey. Kelsey was not allowed respite care until she became very very unstable. I had mental health here twice and called her psychiatrist. It is easy to judge and criticize me for not giving advice to others. Do you want me to tell them from my experience - RA only gets worse and the meds do not work ???????? I pray for people and came here for prayers. I believe in prayer, just like you believe in positive thinking Lovie. BTW Lovie - Bowel movements and constipation are a very real issue when you are on painkillers. I think it is a very appropriate topic for this board. I have been so busy, I have only had time to come back and check what is on the board off and on. I have no desire to be on this board but the misconceptions people have about mentally ill and services and their families - I cannot just let that go. I am fine with people not liking me here but I feel that if you want to dish it out - be sure you know the facts. These misconceptions can hurt people way beyond me. I will not give up my pets, family or openness. I know I do not belong here. Roxy, Please don't start all this up again.There is not one thing left to say to you that hasen't been said, there's no more advice, no more enabeling you,and sorry dear, not a whole lot of sympathy from most that know you. I don't think we have any phycologists here but I gaurentee you that many of us have dealt with mental illness in our families. Some better than others have researched resources, medicines, Federal and Governmental aid and respite care. You are not alone or the only one that deals with this everyday. The only difference is that most people want to get help for themselves or loved ones. I do feel sorry for you Roxy and many others do too but you have been proven over and over to be less than truthful, to say the least. I'm sorry to be so blunt Roxy but IMO your problems stem from pure old selfishness. Whatever is best for you and makes you happy or has the least path of resistance is the one you take. Then you justify yourself by the encouraging posts that you receive. You screwed your daughter over for Brett and Colton. I hope you can live with yourself for this but don't get angry when someone see's right through you.. Now vent on me if it will make you feel better. You opened yourself up by coming back after saying for the umpteenth time that you were not. You are my defination of a troll, or at the least a trouble maker... [QUOTE=AlmondJoy]Well here she goes again......... and again, and again, and again, and again,[QUOTE=Lovie]
I don't want to hurt your feelings.....but for you to AGAIN say you won't be back is a bunch of HOGWASH! What you mean to say is you won't be back today.....or maybe this week. [/QUOTE] Can I call it or what?
But be rest assurred folks! She will be back... that is how Lovie was so right, she has seen Roxy do this last year and well... it is just like cyber Deja Vu! I really do wish Kelsey, Brett, and Colton the best in life, and as for Roxy... well she does not take my postings as sincere, so I gots nothing for her. I have not even replied to this post, just read, because well... all it is... is a rerun from last year. Roxy posts and posts details of her life people do not care to hear, and then she gets offended and makes people look like they are mean to her. I have seen this before and well... I knew it was going to end up like this. [/QUOTE] I just had to log in to say, Joonie you crack me up
One of the hardest things for anyone with emotional problems or with a mental illness to do is to admit that they have such a problem. Just like we go thru phases of denial with our RA...so do people with other chronic illnesses. However, witht he help of family, friends, and sometimes professionals...we move past the denial and into acceptance. It just seems that Roxy is stuck and has been stuck in denial. And until Roxy comes to grips with what everyone else sees and has tried to very nicely tell her, there isn't a whole heck of a lot we can do. It is kind of like an addict that does not want to get better and we are co-dependent because we are trying to help her get better and doing whatever it is possible that we can do and it is only harming that person. Not helping. The best thing we can actually do to help Roxy is nothing at all. It is now where she has to want to help herself. Until that time comes nothing we say or do is going to make a difference. She will take it as we are bashing her (hence the topic name change) and will continue on in the behavior patterns she currently has. I do hope at one point she does get the help she needs so she can feel better about herself and give the care and love to her family that they so need and deserve. Roxy, in no way, shape, or form am I trying to bash you. I'm sure you will take it as that tho considering your current state of thinking. You have got to learn that if you are going to air all of your dirty laundry in a public forum that you can not expect people to agree with you in all aspects. You can not expect constant hand holding, sympathy, and empathy. There are times that we have all made bad or just plain wrong decisions in our lives and have had people call us on it and it has been a wake up call. Then we go on and learn from our mistakes. If you have several people telling someone...HEY...that doesn't sound like the brightest thing in the world...then it probably is not. It is not meant to bash anyone. It is meant to say hey stop and think about this for a second or two. Sometimes support is not a kind word of encouragement or sympathy. Sometimes support is a downright telling it as it is crooked finger shaking in the face. I have had that kind of support not only from some of the people here....but also my family. BECAUSE I NEEDED IT. Roxy...you really can not be a content and happy person on the inside. It is blindingly apparent in your posts and comments to other people here. Why in the world would you want to live life like that??? You have several people here tell you these things over and over and over and over again. Hopefully some day in the near future you will get what we are all saying and get some help for you. I hate to burst your bubble...but people see right thru you. There is no more hiding it. We all know that you are not a happy person with yourself and that you have some issues of your own that you are in a great deal of denial about. Stop using your RA as an excuse for everything. I have a 12 year old daughter who does not even do this with her own RA. And oh yes, in case you are wondering why I have stopped posting to your posts or supporting you, it is because I saw long ago you do not support or encourage anyone else. However, for some reason I could not hold back this time and I am posting this. You can say what you want about me and this post and no harsh or nasty words from you will elicit a repsonse from me. So don't even bother. Bottom line....you are out of rope Roxy. I really feel that no one here is going to throw you anymore rope. Until you realize that you have some of your own serious issues to attend to and take time out of your "busy" life to do that...you are not going to find much support and sympathy around here. I really feel people are just done with it all. You have basically worn out and wrung out every little drop of support and sympathy you can get here. Mainly because you do not offer support, sympathy, or encouragement to anyone else. I bet if you had done so, we would not be having this topic thread right now. I can tell you this tho. This is a wonderful place to be with some very truly wonderful people that I am willing to bet if they see some true and permanent changes in you that you would be welcomed and supported once again. Once again, we aren't bashing you. We are calling it as we see it. And since so many of us share the same ideas and opinions it might be worth going back and reading some of these posts and taking some of this to heart. Until you do that...well...I am sorry to say...not many people will be supporting you. And that is the best support and the best thing they can give to you. [QUOTE=Flames]Roxy, Is this really any of your business and does it affect your personal life in some way or did you just feel the need to get on here and act ugly?! Are you a doctor?! What if she is bi-polar...do you seriously think your statement is helping the situation in any way?! Did anyone force you to click on her posts and read them?! This one totally lit a fire under my ass!! That statement took a lot of nerve and I can't even imagine ANYONE saying anything more nasty than that. That was in every single way possible...uncalled for!! What a monsterous thing to say to anyone!! Just for the record...I wouldn't of even responded at all until the last statement. I've stayed out of this until I read this post and now I'm going to speak one time and one time only regarding this particular post. I am all for people having their own opinion and freedom of speech however, this was one of the most cruel, spiteful, heartless and hateful post I have ever seen. Flames you should be ashamed of yourself!! I am ashamed for you. You don't have to like, agree with or have sympathy for Roxy or anyone else on this board but what you have done goes way beyond an opinion. Some of the things you've said could seriously push someone in a bad state of mind right over the edge. There is absolutely no value to your post and it is certainly not humorous in the least. My final thought on this: This thread seriously needs to be dropped as I sincerely think that it has gone beyond advice or opinions. When people start popping off with angry lips just to hurt someone there is a real problem. Unfortunately my post is going to bump this up again and that sickens me. However, I will not post to this thread again in hopes that it will die out like it should. ~Neasy I don't have a red face. *shrug* I read it. Every time it gets brought up. At this point, it's cheap entertainment. You can call me what you like, I don't care. She's let so much crap out, and everyone has just turned it into a circus. Why can't I read it and get a daily giggle? It's not nessicarily us not wanting to read about her, it's just not wanting to read the *same thing* over and over when it's so obvious that she has a problem. As far as the "mean" comments to Roxy, yeah well, she's said worse. Are we really going to get into pointing fingers? As far as my conscience goes - clear as a bell baby. :) I hope Roxy reads *every* last word on here. Sometimes a good slap in the face is what it takes for sh*t to dawn on people. And sometimes it takes a beating. Looks like Roxy chose the latter of the two. Sure sucks, don't it? I did have to giggle about the Oprah part.....just because all I could think about was how Oprah never shuts up about her stupid "va-jay-jay" Haha Some people. Really folks, at this point in the thread it's time to just get the frick over it already. Are we this bored? Really? When does the new season of Scrubs start...........or the Office....Hmmmm....maybe you kids will drop it when your shows come back on? One can hope. ;-) [QUOTE=now & then]You know, for all of the complaining about Roxy and how some do not want to read about her, there are some hypocrites among us because this thread has had over 4,000 hits. I bet that if we could tell who the readers are that there would be some red faces here. I have been reading it because I think that it so unfair to attack anyone this way. Well, my conscience is clear, how about you? [/QUOTE] Who cares? It's like a car accident. Everyone turns their head to see what happened. Everyone clicks here to see drama. Darn you Soxy!!! It was long gone and forgotten about and you searched thru 3 pages just to bump it back up?! Why?! Oh and some of those 4,000 hits were search engines doing their daily/weekly spidering. So not that many have viewed it. At one time today we have a total of 90 spiders spidering this board all at the same time, so each one of those will count as a view if they search this thread. Die thread Die!!! Roxy is going to be Roxy let it and her go!!!!! Beat that dead horse! BEAT IT!!!! KICK IT!! GET IT!!! Well, I dont know about anyone else but I for darn sure dont have a mental Illness.
Say this wasnt an RA board and Roxy was posting the way she did, you can bet everyone would be saying the same thing too. Nobody is bashing her or beating up on her we are just finally coming to terms with the way she is and speaking out about it. There is nothing wrong with that. If you will read some of the previous posts you will see that people say how they dont mean any harm towards her and truly do care about her but they are just tired of all the same old crap all the time. And truthfully, I dont think anyone is going to change their minds at this point. Now die thread die!!! I've thought for a long time now that if Roxy and all her glory does exist that she is just yanking our chains. Any attention she gets, good or bad, has her wallowing in euphoria. And if she can cause anyone to be at odds with each other because of her nonsense she has scored big time in her game she calls life. Very sad really. She would like nothing better than to destroy long time friendships and support here because SHE doesn't have it anymore. It's all about Roxy... I agree with you all. Lorster Im not fairly new, been signed on again since 05 been around since 03. Signed on back then didnt really post much forgot my username and pass and had to start over again. So Ive been around longer than alot of you just dont post enough to be 'senior member'. Ive read posts after posts about Roxy for a few years now- never been on another board but this one with her. I know her actions too well. And I dont have a gripe just burnt out on it as well. Genesis you are exactly right!!
[QUOTE=lorster]No, lets let this thread exist until the cows come home. That is clearly Katie, that is really funny. I have to ask if it was directed at me? If so, I really wasn't beating the dead horse, I was questioning Lori's comment. Guess I should have PM'd her. [QUOTE=soxy]Thanks for the laugh Katie [/QUOTE] But Soxy, how does a start date of April 2007 translate into being around for a couple of years - egging things on with a cloned name? I am starting to catch on to who the moderators are in here, while pretending there aren't any. Really, Lori? I'm sorry, but I have to respectfully
[QUOTE=lorster]No, lets let this thread exist until the cows come
Good luckPS - one thing I did when I gave up smoking was give up coffee as I always had a ciggie and a cup of coffee (many of both) but the association was always there. I now
have a decaf cappucino when I am out but apart from that dont drink coffee - still makes me think of smoking.
Smoking is not good for your lungs with RA which can also affect them so it is probably important to stop.
Also have heard sunflower seeds being chewed help when you crave a cigarette - havent a clue why but wouldnt hurt trying.
Roxy,
Good morning....I am so sorry you are going through all of this right now. I usually read post in the early morning, and always look to see if you update. I know that taking care of someone with a disability is very tough. (I worked in a home with mentally handicapped adults) It is heart wrenching and stressful...and yes I do believe that stress and RA flares go hand in hand.
I also used Chantix to quit smoking. It is an amazing little pill. After about two weeks of the pills, you won't even think about smoking, nor will you have any desire to have one. I quit for about 3 months, and then had two very stressful family tragedies within 2 months. So needless to say, I started smoking again. Oh well, I will quit again when I'm ready.
I just wanted to say that I know I do not know you well, but you are always in my prayers. Why is it that things have to hit rock bottom before they start improving? Seems unfair.... I hope your pain subsides for you..hugs and prayers....
kateri.
www.theeasywaytostopsmoking.com/
The Author is Allen Carr. Book Title - Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking.
I have three friends who have beat the curse using this book. My Doc thinks it is very good.
While I'm on here, just a quick word to say hi, and know that I have been thinking of you all. The cold frosts and bad winter weather here is not being very kind to my body just lately, and I'm just having very short spurts on the computer. So, I'm heading for bed with my sheepskin electric blanket and hot corn bags.
I believe stress is a definite trigger for a flare.
I have never smoked cigarettes, so can't help there!
Hands hurt, keeping responses short today!
This is simply MY perception and means nothing really, except that it is what I think, so no one should get angry or defensive or anything else but that is up to you.
I have been on this board for awhile now and I think that most people come here for support and empathy. IMHO that is what Roxy seeks from AI. Again, just my opinion, but when anyone offers others takes on her posts besides simply, "Oh poor Roxy, I will pray for you. You are going through so much. Please take care of yourself............" then we see another side of her. I think that is because she only wants the sympathy thingy and not much of the reality thingy and you know, who am I to say that it is right or wrong?
These are just my observations and should be taken with a grain of salt. My personal opinions on anyone's situtation is just that, my personal opinion, and I am entitled to it, though I don't express it all that often.
I think that some simply get tired of hearing the "supportive" posts to Roxy no matter how out of control her life might be and want to offer another perspective.
Jeanne
Someone else is FINALLY seeing how bi-polar and manic ROXY is!
So glad that poor Kelsey is someplace where she can get some help.I came here for support. I got so much support. There are a few evil people that do not care about me or my daughter. I would never have my husband, which we are only friends at the moment, in my home if he were not clean and sober. Kelsey is coming back to live with me. She misses me and wants to come back. Social services said I did all the right things and have taken good care of her. I don't regret the anger I feel at the evil people who have attacked me. They are mean and cruel. I won't be back. I have promised the people I love to stay away from here after I say good bye and thank you to so many of you that have truly been there for me. This is no place for a person who is willing to put their heart on the line, feels no shame in how they live their lives, and just want an outlet when things get tough. Bipolar - geeeeeeeesh - the amount of stress I was going through with Kelsey here and this break - of course I am feeling better. Respite care is only for mentally ill who have decompensated and are unstable. I will miss so many of you but it seems more evil people show up every day. This is no place for me.
IT IS TIME TO SAY 'AMEN' RE THIS SUBJECT....
Roxy, Bingethinker said it very well, very, very well. I think that I had mentioned before that all of you pets required a lot of work and expense and you have said yourself that work is difficult for you and that there is a shortage of money. And then you brought Kelsey in to live with you and that is what any Mother would do, but you were not able at that time or even now. And then you added Colton to the mix and you had Brett to worry about. Wow, it scares me to even think about that.
I would love to have pets, etc. but I cannot keep up with the necessary things in life such as taking care of me! We have to put ourselves first and if that goes well, add on another little chore. You have not realized yet that you are handicapped Roxy. The life you had is gone and now you have to very carefully prepare for what you have now. You had a good life so cherish that memory and move on. It's not easy Roxy, but you are a strong woman and I know you can do it! There is a quote stating that old age is not for sissies and neither is this GD disease that we all have.
As far as these people on the board complaining, I think it's just jealousy on their part because it took the attention away from them. They had a choice to read or not read your messages. They also have a problem to work out.
So take care Roxy.
I'm sorry it's come to this Roxy!! I hope you can get yourself "back on track" and then deal with the other issues in your life! You can do it, Roxy, I know you can!!
I hope that the members of this board who have effectively run Roxy off this board, where she came for support, are happy now. I, for one won't be back here either!!
She's NEVER going to change. It's about the attention she gets. And all of you feed into it by getting into these debates over who is supportive and who is mean to her.
As for those of you who tried to give her some actual resources for help...oh no....there is no way you can possibly be correct. Don't you know Roxy knows everything and everyone else is stupid and can't possibly know "the system" better than she can?
She has continually asked for advice and then gotten mad when she gets it and it's not what she wants to hear. So why does she bother asking? To get attention. She gives out details no one really wants to know about. And yeah there is the old standard, if you don't like it, ignore it. But, that goes for her as well except in her eyes, it doesn't apply.
Let me ask you this: how many times has she caused a divide between members here? Members who might otherwise get along reasonably well? How many posts and hours of peoples' lives have been given to hand holding her, giving support to her which is never returned, people giving asked for advice and info to be told they're wrong? And you let her get away with it?
People have said this is not a supportive place and other have said this is supportive. Well for the most part it can be supportive...but this one issues colors a lot of people's thinking about this site. It has the power to drive off both old members and new. Do you people really not care that ONE person and their issues has been allowed to do that? If people would simply stop responding to her, then there would be no problem. There would still be other problems with this site but at least it wouldn't be one person causing them.
Personally, my opinion of Roxy and her having her daughter in her home was that she was wrong to do it given her health and the instability of her daughter. If she's sick and not taking her meds, that leads to too many other problems. And Roxy's not really in the health to force the issues too easily. Heartbreaking as it is for Roxy, home is not the place for her daughter. That's not just Roxy's health. It is the upheaval in her life and Brett in and out. And the ups and downs of having what seems to be uncontrolled RA. None of that is beneficial to someone who needs a stable environment. But, did Roxy listen when that was pointed out to her? Nope, she knew best. Same as her idea of foster kids, babysitting, and whatever else she's come up with during her "up days" that I've missed.
The problem is, I know people in the past have pointed out to Roxy that she's extremely "me centered" and that she might get more support if she gave more. But, again, did she listen? Nope, because no one but Roxy is right.
Just my two cents.
and again
and again................http://www.nami.org/MSTemplate.cfm?Site=NAMI_Oregon I am sure you said you lived in Oregon, I saw this and thought you might be able to contact them with regard to Kelseys treatment at the institution, it sounds as if she is being neglected and it needs to be reported.
and again
and again................[/QUOTE]
You need to have a psychological evaluation done on yourself. You have quite the history and everyone here knows about it. You have gotten drunk and came online and posted anyway before, you have drank and took narcotics with that alcohol, the list is endless. That is considered to be "self medicating". Look that phrase up.
You have symptoms of bipolar disorder. When a million people tell you, hey you may have a problem. Then it's time to get it checked out. Also I would recommend to quit making this board your own personal Oprah Winfrey show and telling everyone about the least little thing that goes on in your life. If you need something like that then find a counselor, not a message board.
But look at the bright side to all of this, if you are as freaking nuts as everyone says you are you may get to have a room in the same wing together!
[/QUOTE]
what Roxy wanted. Look at the title. And clearly, everyone has had a lot
of fun. Cassandra and Cathy. You must know. RA is a valid medical
diagnosis. Mental illness is not. We all know that, just read the thread. I
honestly have not followed Roxys story as I do not have time to read that
much on this board and she has invited some of this critisism but there
are a few people on this board who cleary have a history with Roxy and
many of us will not understand what all went on and how far back it goes.
Tara, you are fairly new to the board so your gripe with Roxy must go
back to another board, that is all I can figure because you clearly have a
history with her. You people don't even know if Roxy really has RA, or if
she even has a daughter, or a husband, dogs, cats, etc. None of us really
know. Maybe she is on the board to screw with all of you and keep you
totally entertained. Hey, maybe I'm Roxy. Did any of you think of that?
Roxy, if you are reading this, you deserve anything you get because of the
way you have posted in the past. You take more from the board than you
give, it is obvious. Everyone here needs to take something positive from
this thread and honestly spend some of your time on the real RA issues
that we are all dealing with daily. Give Roxy a rest and Roxy, take a break
from this and try to get your life sorted out. You need a break from us
too. Problem is Lori - we all want to have the last word.
what Roxy wanted. Look at the title. And clearly, everyone has had a lot
of fun. Cassandra and Cathy. You must know. RA is a valid medical
diagnosis. Mental illness is not. We all know that, just read the thread. I
honestly have not followed Roxys story as I do not have time to read that
much on this board and she has invited some of this critisism but there
are a few people on this board who cleary have a history with Roxy and
many of us will not understand what all went on and how far back it goes.
Tara, you are fairly new to the board so your gripe with Roxy must go
back to another board, that is all I can figure because you clearly have a
history with her. You people don't even know if Roxy really has RA, or if
she even has a daughter, or a husband, dogs, cats, etc. None of us really
know. Maybe she is on the board to screw with all of you and keep you
totally entertained. Hey, maybe I'm Roxy. Did any of you think of that?
Roxy, if you are reading this, you deserve anything you get because of the
way you have posted in the past. You take more from the board than you
give, it is obvious. Everyone here needs to take something positive from
this thread and honestly spend some of your time on the real RA issues
that we are all dealing with daily. Give Roxy a rest and Roxy, take a break
from this and try to get your life sorted out. You need a break from us
too. [/QUOTE]
disagree. My husband has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and
Schizophrenia. Those are valid illnesses.
home. That is clearly what Roxy wanted. Look at the title. And clearly,
everyone has had a lot of fun. Cassandra and Cathy. You must know.
RA is a valid medical diagnosis. Mental illness is not. We all know that,
just read the thread. I honestly have not followed Roxys story as I do not
have time to read that much on this board and she has invited some of
this critisism but there are a few people on this board who cleary have a
history with Roxy and many of us will not understand what all went on
and how far back it goes. Tara, you are fairly new to the board so your
gripe with Roxy must go back to another board, that is all I can figure
because you clearly have a history with her. Yo