I feel like I have the flu EVERY DAY!!!! This is besides my hips and knees aching. I have a sore throat, swollen lymph glands, achey body, weak..........same old same old. I had an appointment to go see a counselor today, trying to work on how to "cope". I so miss my old life and who I was before this f****** condition. Anyway, I thought, before ra I would have cancelled any appointments feeling this sick but now I have to learn to function feeling sick all the time
Awwwwww
{{{Roxy}}}
I wish I was able to give you a real hug! Please remember, you have lots of "cyber shoulders" to cry on any time. If I had a magic wand I'd make it all go away....Hope your feeling better soon.
Hey Roxy,
You hit the nail right on the head when you said Brett "just wants to fix it." Guys are "fixers" and it is very frustrating to us when we can't. Brett, right now, is having a very hard time seeing you in the pain your in. Especially since he feels like his hands are tied. I'm certain that that man you just married would do anything in the world for you so when you feel like your about to explode, like now, let him know how you feel. Remember, in his own way he is hurting too. I was one of the lucky ones who married someone who knew nothing about RA, but chose to educate herself by reading anything she could related to arthritis. Now, I ask her questions about OUR disease. Your right, this disease can give you a very lonely feeling like your the only one who has it and then there's always that "Why me" question that pops up from time to time. You'll get through this. You're not alone. I'm certain tomorrow will be a better day! Hang tough, Rox!
Roxy, I understand how you feel and I hope you feel better soon. This really can't be fixed (at least not yet) but you're strong and will make it through another day.
I'm on my second week of antibiotics because I too have had a sore throat that doesn't seem to want to go away. When I have uncontrollable pain it takes over my brain. I always joke that my brain cells have temporarily relocated because I can't think about anything else but the pain.
Please take care and don't let it get you down. If you think it might get ahold of you, just spill it out on this post and we will all be here to support you.... I wish we could do it in person but since we can't, I too send you big cyber hugs.
Now, I wish I knew how to make all the great emotions on this post, but I don't and I'm too lazy to figure it out.
I'm going to go rest now because tomorrow is 136 minutes of walking for my marathon training and I'm already worried about what is going to hurt, feet, knees, hips, shoulders. If you are wondering why my shoulders would hurt, it's because of the arm motions you need to make to walk in a marathon. Needless to say, just gently moving my arms forwards and backwards sets up shoulders off. May I say, that is really pisses me off that I can't do normal things without making something hurt
Take Care and Feel Better Soon!!!!
Bingethinker,
what a cute name. I'm glad you have a great wife who read up on your disease. We women are like that. I would research anything I could to help my husband with his problems and even step in a play nurse. Give her a big hug and kiss and let her know you appreciate her....
Well Sweetie; right this minute I know exactly how you feel!!
A month ago I had a slight infection. A cough and congestion. They put me on an antibiotic and I was off my meds for about 17 days while I recouped. I'm pretty sure I started my meds back before I was completely better and now my slight cough and nasal congestion has turned into Bronchitis and a sinus infection. To top it off I've been coughing so much I've pulled something in my back...that tops my list of problems. Once again I'm off my meds until I finish another coarse of antibiotics and the infection is gone. My RD warned me not to restart MTX & Humira until it was COMPLETELY gone...but there was no way I could have made it through my vacation without it. I still had a slight cough...but felt better. Lesson learned. (I've always been a slow learner)
Going back to bed. Feel better guys.
Thanks you guys. I have pretty much done absolutely NOTHING today. It sucks. My hips just ache. I am so glad I have my computer and you to keep me company. Yesterday I went hiking with Brett. It was the first day that I felt decent in over a week. So I wake up this morning feeling ten times worse. It is just not fair!!! Every time I do something fun and feel like my old self I get knocked down ten times harder. One step forward, ten steps back. You know what I mean. I am so glad I have you guys. I am going to see a counselor to work on the guilt I have around being so "lazy" around the house and feeling so worthless around Brett. It is not his fault but ra is hard on both of us. I can tell he does not know what to do around me lately. Go do his own thing or stay- but there is not much he can do when he stays. Today was the first day I got him to go to the gym without me. The house is a mess but I hurt too much. It is a depressing scene right now. I have to hope it gets better this weekend...............I wish I could give you a spoon, mine are gone too:0(
I'm sorry, I know how "it" can just slam you and make you so angry.
I have to go to the post office for my work each day and check the PO Box. There are 2 stairs, just 2 little stairs. My knees are so stiff I just dread those 2 little stairs. Today I was so ANGRY, I went there and did the 2 little stairs and there was nothing in the PO Box. I was so mad that I had used all that energy for nothing. It's just amazing how life has changed and it has been a tough week "spoonwise" for me too.
I am hugging you ((((Rox ))))with all of my heart, I really am. Maybe Brett could read Allen's post....I don't know just a thought.
Again, I wish I could say something great, but I can only say I know how you feel and agree that this is just completely sucky if that's a word.
We love you lots Rox !
Cris, good luck tomorrow
Staci, I love your signature line
Please try to rest and not stress about BRett. He will do what he needs to do to cope. THat is just more stress on you, worrying about him too much. I know you just got married and this is not how it should go, but this is your life, no one elses... Brett didnt marry your RA, he married you and he loves you.. whether you feel great (yesterday musta been a BLAST
THis doesnt sound like much of a pep talk, and Im not telling you to feel better cause you "need to feel good" but i want you to rest and GET better!!!!PM me if you want to talk about education... your job interests me since its so relates to what I do... lets talk about something other than RA. Rent some movies, have a night in with candles... you may not want to move, but that shouldnt stop the romance. (I am SOO jealous of that aspect!!!!) Heres the HUG you liked so much... from me to you!!!!!!!!!!
Later! ps: you are SO Right.. it is such a F****** disease!!!!!!!
I am sorry you have pain and have this disease. I hope that you can find a med that will put you into remission or at least feel better.
I was going to post something earlier today, when you first posted it, before everyone else replied. But I could not think of anything to say.Well, I did think of something to say but it all related back to me...
In a nut shell the post said: I have had to put up with disease my whole life and it still gets me down, frustrated, aggravated, angry and much more. See, I had a few years when I was a teenager where I felt like I could do anything. I was pain-free and stiff-free and was able to be seen as a "normal" person. By about age 17 it slowly crept back and was full blown after I had my daughter. Then recently I was semi-symptom free for 9 months, due to being preggos, and I was able to do more then I had in a long time. Then I slowly had to depend on hubby to do things for me, because my belly was getting bigger and I was unable to do what needed to do. Now, 9 months later after giving birth, I am more dependant on hubby. I just feel like I am a burden to him. I try to do things by myself, but I get frustrated or something else because I cannot do it. Just the other day I was feeling sorry for myself and told hubby I was not going up to the in-laws. And it upset him. He told me I was going and I told him no I wasn't. Anyways to make a long story short. Hubby said "I am tired of this! Find your own damn bra!" I took that as he was tired of me and my health problem. I cried for 2 hours. The worst part about it is hubby does not remember saying the "I am tired of this!" part. But he does remember saying "Find your own damn bra!" The next time hubby finds a "new friend" I am going to let him go. I know that I am a burden to him and I have attitude most of the time and that I cannot do things like I use to. I would not blame him if he finds someone else who is "healthy" and not so dependant on him. He would probably be a better person if he had someone else. Yeah it is one of them days for me. I dwell on things too much.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhh Joonie Girl. You are not a burden. You are a treasure. Why do you think everyone loves you so much on here. Your intelligence and wit, your bluntness and humor, your openness and big heart. It is easy to see why your hubby is there for you. He would not do all the things he does for you if he did not love you dearly. It is easy to understand why. You are the mother of his child and a treasure – he is a lucky man. Don’t let my pity party rub off on you. Yesterday I was having a bad day, today I woke up feeling much better. That is why we come here. To be reminded. There are better days to come. I will be your rock today Joonie Girl. I will come back here and check in today. We love you girlfriend and your hubby loves you too. Feel better. This world is a better place because we share it with you!
I used up all my spoons last night ...but it was because I wanted to do something 'normal' with my husband ...it's noon & I'm just getting up... Speaking of needs...I need a doggy door - I can't keep getting up & down to let this dog in & out all day- he thinks it's a game! Lulu I have been like this all week. Just starting to get over being like this. I got to see my mommy yesterday. She always brightens my day. I miss her. But you can tell when I do not feel good or something is bothering me. I do not call her as much. I only called her like 3 times this week, compared to 20 times a week...lol...sometimes 4 times a day. I do not have many "pity parties" but this week was one of them. Brett is cooking dinner right now and I took time out to visit my friends here. It brings me so much comfort to come here. Brett is wonderful and you are too. I am truly blessed and thank you all for reminding me. I do feel I have good friends here and sometimes I sure do need you. Today was a better day and I think tomorrow may be better yet.
Love, Roxy
I hope you are feeling better right now.
THIS WILL GET BETTER WHEN YOUR MEDS ARE ADJUSTED. I GET TERRIBLY DEPRESSED DURING A REALLY BAD FLARE...IT JUST SEEMS LIKE IT WILL NEVER END...BUT IT FINALLY DOES. I KNOW HOW DOWN IT CAN GET YOU BUT STAY POSITIVE AND CONTINUE TO VISIT YOUR FRIENDS HERE. WERE HERE FOR YOU!!
Hi Roxy,
Glad you are feeling better today. I'm so sorry to
hear how bad you have been feeling and also that I
wasn't on-line to read your post earlier.
I totally understand about the flu thing..I feel like I
have the flu all the time. I think sometimes the worst
part is starting to feel better for awhile and thinking
it's going to be a good day, and then all the sudden
strength is gone. It's so hard to try to explain to
friends why I can't be out doing things every
day/night and why it's hard to make firm
commitments.
I'm glad you got to get outdoors for awhile and go for
a hike. Brett sounds so wonderful-especially with a
massage out of the blue! What a sweetheart.
I hope you enjoy your evening of ice cream and
movies.
And remember you have lot's of friends who
understand and are here for you.
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